Emma Watson Not The Angel We Thought?
It is old news that scarhead Daniel Radders has taken to smoking 20 a day but it seems like Emma Watson who plays geeky Hermione Granger has moved on to...well, other things.
Read full storyClinton to Obama: Stay in the race, see if I care
Senator Hillary Rodham Clinton had a few words of advice today for her rival, Senator Barack Obama: Stay in the race as long as you want - see if I care.
Read full storyHappy Man Mysteriously Stops Whistling
Popular cheery guy, Larry Phelps is well known to the citizens of Kingston Town, Jamaica as 'happy Larry', but to everyone's astonishment last Friday he suddenly stopped whistling, wearing brightly colore...
Read full storyJenna Bush to model for Victoria's Beaver
Crawford, Texas - (Hairy Ass Mess): Just weeks away from her wedding to Henry 'Hagar the Horrible' Hagar Jenna Bush has signed a lucrative modelling contract with racy lingerie boutique chain Victoria's Beaver.
Read full storyBig Oil couple has cornered 75% global reserves Senate Committee's Rep Malarkey told
Washington DC - (Hydrocarbons Mess): Executives from the world's top five oil companies are meeting with US lawmakers today.
Read full storyBoo-birds Bash Bush
George W. Bush, 43rd president of the United States and former part-owner of a major league baseball team, threw out the first pitch at the Washington Nationals baseball stadium yesterday in the US capitol. Much, or perhaps most, of the opening day...
Read full storyHillary Clubs, Kills, and Eats Baby Seals
(Philadelphia PA) Hillary Clinton left the Pennsylvania primary campaign for the weekend to blow off a little steam in northern Canada. She took Chelsea and went on her annual baby seal hunt. She took the same nail-studded club she used for chasing B...
Read full storyT5 Torch Trepidation
The Olympic torch relay faces its toughest challenge yet as it approaches London and the dreaded Terminal 5 that has recently opened amid chaotic circumstances at Heathrow Airport.
Read full storyApril Fools: The Spoofers Day Off
Somewhere in the Southern Hemisphere, relaxing on a sunbed - That's right, it's my day off today. With the whole world gone April Fools Day mad, there is no need for satirical and spoof stories to balance out this serious world. Today, the entire contingent of spoofers all around the world are having a day off.
Read full storyHospital And Supermarket Apologise For Foetus Blunder
A hospital and a supermarket have apologised to the public after 7 foetuses were lost from an ante-natal unit and were later discovered on shelves at a local supermarket described as Poussin. Bosses at the hospital, St Agnez-on-the-Hill in Sudbury...
Read full storyChuck E. Cheese Ends Dollar Peg
Pizza Time Theatre Inc., the parent company of Chuck E. Cheese restaurants has announced that Chuck E. Cheese Game Tokens (CECGT) will no longer be pegged to the dollar, but will instead be tied to a basket of currencies, including the Swiss franc, t...
Read full storyGay people expect discrimination; Jews expect a discount
A new survey released today has found that gay, bisexual and lesbian people think that everyone from ice cream vendors to Santa Claus treats them less favourably because of their sexuality.
Read full storyHarry Potter's April Fools Joke Backfires
What was meant to be a harmless April Fools joke for Harry went terribly wrong resulting in both the young actor and his adoptive mother critically ill in a London hospital.
Read full storyPuppet Monarch's new coat of arms for UK coins
London - (Ass Mess): "A lavishly revamped coat of arms featuring ancestral Puppet Monarchy symbols is to be unveiled this week," a Royal Mint source said today.
Read full storyHarriet Harman wears a stab-proof vest to Cabinet
London - (Ass Mess): Drowning Street officials have confirmed that deputy Labour Party leader Harriet Harman regularly wears a flak jacket to Cabinet meetings.
Read full story2008 Grand National Betting Scandal Latest
Hundreds of Housewives have been arrested after police acted on a tip-off from a leading bookmaker that the women were neglecting their domestic duties, and nipping out to place their yearly flutters on the G...
Read full storyFabio Capello Arrested
Fabio Capello, the England football team manager, has been arrested by police in London, over suspicions that he is an Italian.
Read full storyTerminal 5 Luggage Sale Starts Tomorrow
Terminal 5, the new £4.3billion state-of-the-art facility at Heathrow Airport, that was shut down earlier this week when it transpired that its checking-in system didn't work, is to hold a sale of all unclaimed baggage
Read full storyMicrosoft Cancels Windows Vista
In a not-totally unexpected move, Microsoft reversed the roles of Windows Vista and XP. The spokesman for Microsoft said, "Vista is on the way out and XP is on the way in."...
Read full storyGambling Supplants Pedophilia in NY Roman Catholic Diocese
Roman Catholic dioceses across the world and the US of A have been battling a legion of pedophilia cases perpetrated by so-called celibate priests. Whether child molestation causes celibacy or vice causes versa, the NY Archdiocese has disclosed a new...
Read full storyRice Gives Head-way In Israel!
Sexcretary of State Condoleezza Rice, after ignoring the Palestinian-Israeli conflict for most of her life has finally gone to the Holy Land and there she has given headway. .
Read full storyTony Resko Comes to al-Sayyid Moqtada al-Sadr
Tony Resko: Godfather, al-Sayyid, I come to you with all due respect and all praise and honor to Allah and San Guiseppe. Oh Great al-Sayyid of the two double-uus, I would never disturb you on this blessed day when you art so occupied in the slaughter of the occupying infidels. May Saint Jude, the Blessed Mother and Mohammed bless and guide your every suicide bomber, I mean, holy martyr.
Read full storyFuss Over U-Tele-Tubies Ignores Hot New Daspooftube!
Daspooftube is TheSpoof.com's answer to the lame ass U-Tele-Tubies webslum. Rainin' McCain, Hott 4 Hills, Pequenya HC and Obama-sistable are just some of the candie-crazed idiocy that seems to be sweeping the nation and the world. As with mos...
Read full storyShyness can be cured by breaking wind in church, says expert
A well respected world authority on acute shyness and social anxiety has developing a new technique which he is convinced will alleviate the problems of sufferers. His solution -one so unusual that it has caused a few ripples in the academic pool so...
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