Women No Longer Needed - Solutions being Discussed at UN
In the age of technology and the "Modern Man" which now surrounds us, and which boasts triumphs it is claimed by top scientists that women are no longer needed!...
Read full storyRonald McDonald drops a whopper as condom found in Happy Meal
Wellington, New Zealand - (Ass Mess): In an innovative marketing twist today the Wellington branch of fast food retailer McDonalds added an unexpected little treasure to the Happy Meal bag of seven year old Maria Whitaker's take-out meal: a condo...
Read full storyRichard Gere, could get banged up in Bombay!
An Indian court has issued an arrest warrant for Hollywood actor Richard Gere after he kissed Bollywood star Shilpa Shetty at an anti aids demo.
Read full storyKate & Wills Spilt : Royals happy as setting up another car crash was to much like hard work last time
After the shock split of the couple "made" for each other the royals could breath a sigh of relief.
Read full storyTV satellites gone wrong
Today a massive laser beam with toxic TV rays destroyed an area of sea the size of California, and Sky television is being blamed.
Read full storyPhilosopher Snaps His Towel at Gym Discovery
A philosopher at Rodin University is pioneering a new thought in maxims. Until now the research of old maxims using new methods has been severely lacking and the time has come for a change.
Read full storyRosie O'Donnell To Have Donald Trump's Baby
(New York, New York) -- Opposites really do attract. Billionaire developer, media star, and serial monogamist Donald Trump, has announced that comedian turned talk show host and "infant terrible" Rosie O'Donnell will carry his child.
Read full storyCondi to Release record
Empowered Black Woman Condi Rice is to get down with her neighborhood by releasing a rap record, the move comes as she announces that she plans to run for 2008 Presidential elections!...
Read full storyBetty Ford Center Opens New Sanjaya Wing
A spokesperson for the Betty Ford Center has announced the opening of the new Sanjaya wing, devoted to young people of questionable, still-burgeoning talent who are catapulted into a position of wealth and fame without cultivating the coping skills r...
Read full storyBeanz Meanz Finez
London - (Ass Mess): In a classic Naomi Campbell moment of unsurpassing cretinous idiocy droopy-faced and be-botoxed Brit movie actor Hugh Grant took out his anger on a pap yesterday by throwing the nearest heavy projectile to hand, a 50p can of McT...
Read full storyPrince Harry threatens to leave Army
Third in line to the British Throne, Prince Harry, said today that if he isn't allowed to go to Iraq, he will "drag my sorry ass out of the Army". Harry, 23, dragged his sorry ass into the Army in 2005,...
Read full storyCurse of Imus,Act III, Scene II
Bristol, Rhose Island - (Ass mess): The curse of Don Imus is spreading fast as two more radio shock jocks were fired today for repeating his inimicable racist diatribe about 'nappy-headed hos'.
Read full storyAngelina Jolie to Adopt Prince Harry
London - Actress/sex kitten Angelina Jolie announced today that she would be seeking to adopt Prince Harry.
Read full storyGere in hiding as Indian arrest warrant issued for Kama Sutra acts of obscenity
California - (Ass Mess): Greying Pretty Woman movie star Richard Gere was back home hiding behind the sofa at his Beverley Hills mansion today as Rajasthani prosecutors issued an arrest warrant naming him as as the perpetrator of 'an obscene act&...
Read full storyJolie Nearly Adopts Jennifer Aniston
Actress Jennifer Aniston has revealed that she was nearly adopted by Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt prior to them adopting their fifth child, Pax Thien, while in Vietnam.
Read full storyPotter Book Lost
The manuscript for the final Harry Potter book, "Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows," has been lost according to information given at a press event at the Ritz Hotel in London.
Read full storyGore Says He Invented the Warp Drive
CCN (Crazy Cal News) - NASA - Today, when NASA engineers announced that they had developed the warp drive. The long researched and awaited discovery was announced to be a boost to space travel and would allow astronauts to travel great distances in...
Read full storyChina creates first ever "Women's Town"
BEIJING (Reuters) - Chinese tourism authorities are seeking investment to build a novel concept attraction -- the world's first "women's town", where men get punished for disobedience, an official said on Thursday.
Read full storyBush Has Intern of His Own
CCN (Crazy Cal News) - Washington, D.C. - While President Bush was concentrating on the testimonies in the Senate inquiries, Democrats went to the president's bedroom and found that President Bush has an intern of his own.
Read full storyNASA Selects Cyberbock Industries for Next Generation Spacesuit
DAYTON, OH, Apr. 27 -- The National Aeronautics and Space Administration (NASA) has selected Cyberbock Industries to be one of three competing prime contractors for the development of a new generation of spacesuits, to be used in future manned explor...
Read full storyIntroduction of New Writer: Doppelbock
In order to understand Doppelbock, you must first understand the history of his family -- the Bock family.
Read full storyHillary Teaches Kids to Sue Parents
CCN (Crazy Cal News) - New York - Today, Hillary Clinton took time out from her election campaign and stopped at a grade school to instruct children on how to sue their parents.
Read full storyJessica Alba Tops Sex Poll Despite No Nude Pics
Jessica Alba today topped the fhm sexist woman poll despite never having been seen nude in her entire life by anyone."I like to buck the trend" said Jessica today "but I dont like to be seen buck naked."...
Read full storyChampions League Final Venue To Be Switched - Possibly
UEFA, the governing body of European football, has hinted that they are reconsidering the venue for this year's Champion's League final.
Read full storyCan Spinal Tap save Al Gore's ass?
New York - (Rotters): Legendary 80s spoof band Spinal Tap are set to reinvigorate Al Gore's flagging determination to get as much attention as possible by reinventing himself as a global eco warrior whose date with destiny lies in the 2008 White...
Read full storyAlan Ball/Boris Yeltsin Funerals Mix-up
There was confusion today on both sides of the Iron Curtain over the funerals of ex-Russian President Boris Yeltsin, and former England World Cup winner Alan Ball, who is dead.
Read full storyNASA set to dump Hawking into Bermuda Triangle area of Atlantic Ocean
Kennedy Space Center, Florida - (Rotters): NASA is ready to dump plagiarising wannabe Albert Einstein the Second pseudo-scientist Stephen Hawking into the Atlantic Ocean during an apparently routine space weightlessness flight exercise today aboard a...
Read full storyChoir boys in abuse cover up
Former choirmaster Peter Halliday is due to be sentence today for molesting boys during the 80's. One of his former victims said "When your first sexual experience is a 40-year-old man forcing himself on you it's pretty horrific" An ordeal Billy P...
Read full storyPlease can Hugh not feed the Paps
Following the recent furore surrounding Hugh Grant's alleged assault on a paparazzi, police authorities have asked members of the public not to feed any paps they may come across in the street.
Read full storyHugh Grant Has Bean Nicked
News just in today that average actor and man who constantly says gosh when suprised, Hugh Grant has been arrested for throwing baked beans.
Read full storyThe War is over, no one left alive in Iraq! Prince Harry relieved
The White House and Downing Street released together a joint press…er…release simultaneously late last night at the same time to say that the war in Iraq is now officially over as most Iraqis are now dead or fled the country.
Read full storyPsychiatrist Says Bush V Bush Shows Split Personality
CCN (Crazy Cal News) - Washington, D.C. - White House Psychiatrist, Peter Bourne, examined the video, Bush V Bush on YouTube and determined that he has dissociative identity disorder, formerly known as multiple personality disorder.
Read full storyJessica's No Hero
CCN (Crazy Cal News) - West Virginia - Ex-private Jessica Lynch admitted during testimony, "I'm no hero. I'm just a nappy headed ho."...
Read full storySnoop Dogg bans Australia!
World famous rapper, Snoop Dogg has taken the unprecedented step of banning Australia from the world of rap.
Read full storyBrown and Cameron Bid for Sympathy
Genealogists discovered that Gordon Brown, Chancellor of the Exchequera, clergyman's son, molested by a priest, and David Cameron, a stockbroker's son, both had great-grand parents who were Scottish farmers. They also share the same tailor, a...
Read full storyGordon Brown to Become English
In what some would say is a desperate attempt to boost plummeting poll figures and approval ratings across the board, a frankly shell shocked spokesman representing a new grouping of Brownite Labour MP's has announced that The Chancellor and Prim...
Read full storyGordon Brown Extorts the SNP for Oil
CCN (Crazy Cal News) - London - Yesterday, Gordon Brown extorted the Scottish National Party, or SNP, for oil. He warned the SNP that if they took rights over their own oil, their £30 billion that Scotland receives every year from the Treasury.
Read full storyTheSpoof.com wins contract to be International News Agency!
In a shock announcement this morning, all the other international news agencies have been deemed "inadequate" "outdated" and "not up to the job", Henceforth, all news pertaining to international issues w...
Read full storyPhil Spector "Russian Roulette" Claim
Prosecutors at the murder trial of mentalist nutcase music producer Phil Spector have claimed that he "was always beating up women".
Read full storyHarry To Do Sod All in Iraq
Prince Harry's role in Iraq is under review today. It has been reveal by Army chiefs that the Harry will not be allowed to go to the front line as it is too dangerous.
Read full storyAn Apology
In an article posted earlier here on The Spoof, concerning the announcement of Rosie O'Donnell's new reality show, "America's Biggest Mouth", this writer utilized a picture of a pig with a caption indicating that it was Miss O'Donnell making the announcement at a news conference.
Read full storyHeather Mills McCartney Dumped Out Of 'Dancing With The Stars'
Heather Mills McCartney, the estranged wife of murdered ex-Soviet spy Alexander Litvinenko, has been banished from Dancing With The Stars, the US version of the BBC show, Stiffly Come Dancing.
Read full storyI Am Not A Plastic Bag Says Paris Hilton
Typically blank-eyed heiress Paris Hilton was visibly upset today during a press interview in which she critisized top designer Anya Hindmarsh over her "insulting" designer bag for Sainsbury's Supermarkets.
Read full storyKarl Rove To Be Indicted
(Executive Branch) -- Karl Rove, Political Consellor to President George W Bush and often referred to over the years as Bush's Brain (Bush's Liver, Herb Peterson, took early retirement with medical leave), has been served another subpoena, a...
Read full storySatan & Cheney in 2008: A Father & Son Ticket
(The 8th Ring of Hades) -- The Prince of Darkness (I-Darkness) and Richard B A Dick Cheney (R-Wyoming) have announced they will mount a campaign for the presidency of the United States. It is believed to be the first Father & Son Ticket although Joh...
Read full storyLaura Bush Suffering
CCN (Crazy Cal News) - Laura Bush said on national TV, "...believe me, no one suffers more than their president and... and uh I do."...
Read full storyObama criticizes Bush's microchip implant
Earlier today Democratic candidate Barack Obama, held an interview with members of the Democratic party at a secrete location in BFE Washington with support from the Hollywood Liberal Association (a well known celebrity organization) to discuss Bush&...
Read full storyBush Comments on the Genocide in Darfur
CCN (Crazy Cal News) - Washington D.C. - Upon hearing about the genocide in Darfur, President Bush made a televised speech to the people in Darfur.
Read full storyBillionaires Start $60 Million Dollar Education Effort
CCN (Crazy Cal News) - Eli Broad and Bill Gates, the two most important philanthropists in American public education, pumped more than $2 billion into improving schools, Now, however, dissatisfied with the pace of American education, they are joining...
Read full storyApple Introduces "i-Shred" Combo Printer-Shredder
Cupertino, CA (USA) - Apple Computer shocked the computer industry today by introducing the i-Shred combination printer-shredder, a sleek unit that creates and destroys corporate documents without any operator intervention. This revolutionary office...
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