Jolie Nearly Adopts Jennifer Aniston

Funny story written by Stefano M. Stefano

Thursday, 26 April 2007

image for Jolie Nearly Adopts Jennifer Aniston
Jennifer Aniston - She's in there somewhere

Actress Jennifer Aniston has revealed that she was nearly adopted by Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt prior to them adopting their fifth child, Pax Thien, while in Vietnam.

"It was a crazy, silly, dopey idea from one of my friends. Either Matt Leblanc or Barbara Walters, I forget. I was all liquored up at the time, and thought I could get back into Brad's life by pretending to be an orphan. I thought I could do it, because I am, after all, an actress."

Hopping a flight to Vietnam, and sneaking into the orphanage dressed as a baby complete with baby bonnet and pacifier, Aniston's hopes were raised when the couple spotted her and wondered why she was such a big girl.

"I was making goo-goo ga-ga sounds in my crib, and when they asked why I was bigger than the other children I said, 'I'm just big boned'."

The jig was up; Brad ran screaming from the orphanage and Jolie grabbed Pax, who was in the next crib, and left to join her man.

"I thought I did a good job," Aniston said, adding, "I squinted my eyes and looked all cute and needy, but I guess they just wanted a boy. Again. Geez, how many kids do they have now? 15 or 16? Maybe I should have been saying goo-goo ga-ga in Vietnamese and not American. I guess I messed up. Do you have Brad's phone number?"

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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