There were 196 spoof news stories published in 2001. A selection of the most popular stories is shown here. You can use the calendar on the right hand side to browse the spoof news archives.
Charlie Dimmock's nipples fail to erect
The BBC switchboard was jammed after last week's edition of Groundforce brought a flood of complaints from angry male viewers.
Read full storyUncovered - '80's 'Sunday Sport' Stories Scam!
It was just one gigantic hoax, folks! Those colourful Sunday Sport stories from the eighties that gripped the nation's imagination were nothing more than barefaced lies!...
Read full storyAnn Widdecombe Not Anorexic
Sources close to the Conservative Party today reiterated claims that Ann Widdecombe was not in fact anorexic. In refuting the claims, the way would now seem clear for Miss Widdecombe to stand for the Tory Leadership.
Read full storyHanes To Produce Crotch Sock
The Hanes Company, long known for it fine undershirts, socks, and underwear, delved into a new market with the announcement of their new line of crotch socks.
Read full storyMagician Pulls Hat Out Of Rabbit!
The Great Gorgonzola, master magician with 'The Zwumpee Baloney Circus' troupe, yesterday unveiled his new trick to a crowd of reporters in London.
Read full storySteven Gately Considers Return To Closet
In a dramatic change of heart, Boyzone member Stephen Gately is poised to announce that he is straight.
Read full storyEnglish Teacher Given Long Sentence
Yesterday, Jonathan Gasoven, English Teacher at Laughborough School, Middlesex, was given a long sentence by Judge Mortimer Mcloud.
Read full storyQueen Mother: She won't wear nickers, revelation!
The Queen Mother made a firm stand against would-be thieves yesterday when she said that she "couldn't abide people who steal things".
Read full storyNew Strain of Rabies Found in Ants!
Last week, Scientists at the University of Wales discovered a new strain of rabies in ants.
Read full storyLara Croft - The Reality of the Tomb Raider
Developers at Core design, the people who 'gave birth' to Lara Croft, sex-icon of the virtual world, have announced that Ms. Croft has taken her life into her own hands and now acts independently of the team at Core.
Read full storyPlanet of the Apes Movie Further Confuses Teenager
The new Mark Wahlberg movie Planet of the Apes has come under fire for adding to a teenage boys sexual confusion.
Read full storySchool days are the best of your life.
A shocking revelation came to light earlier today from the Minister of Education that is sure to cause controversy.
Read full storyThe Flying Pensioner Phenomenon
The Health and Safety Executive has recently been called in to investigate a spate of freak accidents, involving 'flying pensioners', that continue to plague nursing homes in the Border regions of Scotland.
Read full storyWhat A Rip Off - Cruel BBC Con Exposed
What do Sir David Attenborough, Craig Doyle and Keith Floyd have in common? They're all fakes according to Jim Wriddle, who worked in the BBC canteen for more than thirty years.
Read full storyArse found on Mars
Scientists today released findings that suggest a great big arse has been found on Mars.
Read full storyBoo Boo Bear Gay
As most kids, I was always a big fan of Yogi Bear. So when I heard that Boo Boo & Yogi were a pair I sent one of my field agents to investigate.
Read full storyManson 'Normal' Shock
Outrageous rocker Marilyn Manson has once again shocked the rock establishment by announcing his decision to become "normal".
Read full storyTeenager admits daft stunt not influenced by TV
A teenager yesterday admitted that a ludicrously stupid stunt he had pulled was completely his own idea and not at all influenced by TV or films.
Read full storyEscapologist Gets Roped Into Prison Escape Bid!
Yesterday it transpired that an escapologist by the name of Keys Maloney was involved in a prison escape bid with auctioneer Harry Dunworthy. The bid, which took place at Dartmoor, involved Keys Maloney in infiltrating an auction house and waiting p...
Read full storyBritish Weather Boom Smashes Records!
The British weather boom continues. According to a leading meteorological expert we've already had more weather this year than in the last three years put together.
Read full storyFolic Acid Good, Home-Made Acid Makes You Crazy
A medical report published last week states that the popular supplement taken by pregnant mothers may raise the chances of a pregnancy resulting in twins. Many women take folic acid during pregnancy to prevent their child from getting spina bifida or...
Read full storyKKK Image Shaken By Gay Bias Claim
The Ku Klux Klan has long been known for its ideals of being a caring and impartial group. The group that would set fire to crosses so non-believers could be reminded of Jesus' sacrifice even at night. A group who was just searching for what we...
Read full storyBlue Blue Peter Blew Elephant
A probe was launched at the BBC today amid claims that award winning children's television programme Blue Peter was making use of subliminal messages designed to warp young minds.
Read full storyExam exams
School kids in Arizona are to start a new subject as part of their syllabus: exams.
Read full storyBidding Ends On Kidman-Cruise Divorce Jokes
CBS' The Late Show with David Letterman has emerged the victor in the most heated jokes auction in entertainment history.
Read full storyPrince William wants all students bar-coded
The Students Union expressed its horror at proposals by his Royal Highness, Prince William , that all students should be tattooed with barcodes.
Read full storyMuse To Strike
Poets, writers and musicians could face weeks of severe disruption if a strike by the muse goes ahead.
Read full storyBea Arthur Eats Crowe?
Police officials in California continue to deny rumors of Bea Arthur's eminent arrest in connection with the recent disappearance of Oscar winning actor and Hollywood heartthrob, Russell Crowe.
Read full storyAmbulance Chasers R' Us will make you RICH!
Well, how rich do you want to be? If you are a poor, talentless, loser, then its time you consulted our resident team of cheats, liars and fraudsters at 'AMBULANCE CHASERS R' US'.
Read full storyTennis, It's a Funny Old Game
I was watching tennis last night on the telly, and I didn't quite understand what it was about. Two people just hitting a ball around, I mean come on! At least with football you have some kind of team action going on. But with tennis it's just like, what?!...
Read full storyBog Theives Cause Brown Pants
A gang of thieves, whose blatant scummery has shocked locals, has rocked Milton Keynes, North Bucks. They've been nicking public loo-rolls, and the council is doing practically absolutely nothing about it.
Read full storyTeenage Girl 76% Compatible With Josh Hartnett
A simple numerical test has proven that 14 year old Kayleigh Roberts of Atlanta, Georgia is 76% compatible with the actor Josh Hartnett.
Read full storyChristians Wanted - Apply Coliseum
Confusion reigned in Rome today amid reports that next month's opening of the Gladiatorial Games at the Coliseum was under threat. Snuff movie mogul Theopolis Theodopholis was distraught when interviewed at his Pisa mansion. "It's not...
Read full storyThe TheSpoof.com Guide To Summer Fun & Safety
With summer already here, many readers may have already been on their annual summertime excursions to the beach and held many a cookout. However, its never too late to learn some new fun and safety tips.
Read full storyOffice supply inventor dies at 71
Milton Stamp, office supply entrepreneur and inventor died at his home recently after an extended illness. Stamp was well known to his colleagues, who, according to his wife Berta, were always somewhat skeptical about his ideas.
Read full storyBuffy goes Batty
Sarah Michelle Geller was charged with murder yesterday. Geller accidentally plunged a wooden stake through the heart of the shows director.
Read full storyHokey Cokey "not what it's all about"
A British scientists have discovered that the hokey cokey is not in fact what it's all about, in a report to be published later today.
Read full story'No Buttons On Moon!' cries Mr. Spoon's daughter
The daughter of Mr. Spoon, once celebrated children's entertainer and all round friendly alien, has revealed that the moon upon which Mr. Spoon lived had no buttons.
Read full storySport favours morons
At school, sport's day was one of those classic occasions in which the strong survive and the weak get hurt and then later lambasted for it.
Read full storyBeckham in Spectacle Shocker
David's done it again. Not content with the sarong and sexy knickers, Becks has been compelled to top them all with his latest fashion statement.
Read full storyPop group Steps to be Reclassified
In an extraordinary move Home Secretary David Blunkett has forwarded proposals for the cheesy pop/ novelty covers band Steps to be reclassified.
Read full storyWhy not take your Christmas tree on holiday?
WHOPEE!! It's summer holidays again --- pack the suitcases, cancel the milk, take the dog to the kennels - big sigh of relief! Everything done and dusted! All set for fun and sun --- But wait a minute! Haven't we forgotten something?...
Read full storySchwazeneggar terminates cigar contract
Phillip Morris is sueing Arnold Schwazeneggar for breach of contract. It seems the giant tobacco company contracted Arnold as it's spokesperson for it's new line of cigar, The Terminator.
Read full storyWimbledon Troubles
Play at wimbledon was stopped at the beginning of this month by a drug police squad, after they had recieved an anonymous tip-off that the ground keepers at the Wimbledon tennis grounds had been growing an illegal drug on centre court.
Read full storyScientists Crack Genetic Nougat Code
After years of research, Canadian scientists have discovered the chemical make-up of nougat, the tasty, soft compound found in candy bars such as Snickers. Six years of laboratory testing have finally paid of for the team of researchers based in a se...
Read full storyBritish Dance Unhealthy
A survey published this week has found the state of British dance music to be very unhealthy.
Read full storyNew Glue
British scientists have announced today that they have formulated a glue which they believe is the strongest in the world.
Read full storyRaging Queen
Her Majesty the Queen launched a damning indictment of the British people today.
Read full storyPluto whups Mickey
Pluto has been arrested following a violent fracas with owner, Mickey Mouse. The naughty dog is expected to be freed on bail with the words: "Bad dog, naughty dog, get in your basket!"...
Read full storyLicense to Ill
There was a time when Britain just had to worry about its raging drug problem. Now, there is a new social plague on our streets, and it is people who deal and take illness purely for recreation.
Read full storyBlair Makes Mistake
After discovering some dated literature in the House of Commons, a recent speech made by Tony Blair did not help him in beginning his new term in office well. Not well at all.
Read full storyOld Firm to join Rollerball League
As confusion hangs over their entry into the English Premiership, Celtic and Rangers have turned elsewhere in their desperate attempt to finish 7th and 8th in the league by moving to America to join one of the successful Rollerball leagues.
Read full storyTony the Tiger Mauls Pop of Snap Crackle Fame
Pop, the cheeky little fella from the Rice Krispies adverts, has been mauled to death by Tony the Tiger following years of enforced vegetarianism.
Read full storyRevolutionary New Community to Begin Construction
SOUTHERN PODUNK, AL Residents of Southern Podunk will finally have the opportunity to experience all of the conveniences of big-city living when the Rensfield Development Company (RDC) opens the doors of its new residential high-ri...
Read full storyBoy Stalked By Old Actor
Police are to launch an investigation after a boy of 12 told them an elderly actor had been stalking him at a rugby match. The incident took place at Esher rugby ground in Surrey last month.
Read full storyThieves Get Chatty
People who chat on the internet should be aware, a group of thieves are working the web and taking what they see. E-Crime is on the up, and the E part is only half the operation. "Internet thieves? Ha - Don't make me laugh!", I hear you cry. But don't get too complacent my dears, these people are professionals, and very light fingered ones at that! The thieves mainly target single males, who...
Read full storyHague re-signs after landslide
William Hague, leader of the UK Conservative party, has been forced to re-sign a personal document after he was caught in a landslide and his writing went wobbly.
Read full storyManager "Bright tailed and Bushy eyed"
A senior management executive is celebrating today after finally being able to comb his eyebrows upwards.
Read full storyStar Trek - Guilty
Star Trek fans reacted with horror today as the US Federal Court returned a guilty verdict against the show's producers over cruelty to crewmembers in red sweaters.
Read full storyBen And Bessie To Marry
Aunt Bessie, the Yorkshire pudding millionairess and Uncle Ben, the rice magnate are engaged again and will marry next year, according to close friends.
Read full storyLoo Read
An Essex man was in trouble this morning when he ran out of new things to read on the toilet.
Read full storyNew Salon Driven By Success
A hairdresser whose salon has won a New Business award for outstanding achievement says his success is all thanks to his driving.
Read full storySchumacher's Really A Crap Driver
At last the secret of Michael Schumacher's phenomenal success in Formula One racing, has been leaked to the public.
Read full storyChanging Rooms' Star House Ruined
The presenter of the TV series "Changing Rooms", Carol Smelly, was described as "distraught, a complete mess" after vandals spent 3 weeks in her house redecorating. The sick odd-jobbers filled every room with MDF "Handy Andy...
Read full storyMcDonalds Sued
Average businessman, Keith Remington, is to sue fast food chain McDonalds amid claims that food he ordered via a local drive-thru came to him without error.
Read full storyHamiltons Face Fresh Sexual Deviance Charge
United Nations President Kofi Annan issued a plea for calm today amid claims that disgraced former Tory MP Neil Hamilton and his wife Christine sexually assaulted the island of Tonganoma during an official government visit in 1993.
Read full storyGypsy Mozzarella Pavement Pizza Artist To The Star
Soon to be on the lips of all, is "Gypsy Mozzarella, pavement pizza artist to the stars!"...
Read full storyCritic Sez The Media is 'Pap and Useless'
Shocking news for all us news fans. Some buffed-up critic called Funky Spyglass has described our television as "pap" and the Internet as "useless".
Read full storyBush Calls For Mid-East Peace
Valiant efforts have been made by world, Arab and Israeli statesmen to call for an end to violence in the Middle-East, and a return to the peace process. President Bush has led the world in saying "peace is good". Tony Blair followed by j...
Read full story'Cravens' Is NOT John Newsrounds Middle Name!
In a shock revelation it has transpired that 'Cravens' is not John Newsround's middle name.
Read full storyJohn Starks ball playing days may be over
Utah Jazz guard John Starks hasn't been the same since his playing minutes shrunk this past season. Just recently he found out his testicle was missing.
Read full storySteps Taken To Rebuild Afghanistan
The United States says Steps are being taken to rebuild Afghanistan. The all-singing, all-dancing group will accompany senior UN officials on a tour of the war-torn country.
Read full storyTo Boldly Go! - CyberSpace Travel One Step Nearer
Jubilant British Cyber-physicists were last night on the brink of making the most important scientific breakthrough since man first stepped on the moon - or so they say. After weeks of painstaking research and endless fruitless experimentation, it is...
Read full storyWoman Shoplifted Goods In Her Eyebags
A woman has been sentenced to 6 months in prison for stealing over £10,000 of goods from various shops. Over the course of a year, she had been concealing items including buttons, soap-powder, and fridge-freezers in her prodigious eyebags.
Read full storyLady hurt in gecko incident
Margo Beckinsall was injured this week when she tried to befriend an evil gecko.
Read full storySpielberg admits 'I was abducted'
The director who made blockbusters such as Jaws and Close Encounters of the Third Kind claims he was abducted by aliens before he became famous.
Read full storyTheLordGodCarpets.com
"I know, I know," said God to Moses over the telephone. "But I had to add Carpets because someone already had TheLordGod.com."...
Read full storyVicious Vicar Bites Bishop's Bottom
Police were called early today to the vicarage of the church of Donny in the Wold amid reports that the resident vicar, Father Seamus O'Flannigan, had sunk his teeth into the Bishop of Brighton's bottom.
Read full storyGardener Gavin Told Off
Avant gardener Diarmuid Gavin has been severely told off, according to neighbours.
Read full storySexy Kylie fights dirty in the gutter?
The Press Complaints Authority issued its strongest protest yet over harassment of members of the 'gutter press' by celebrities, pop stars and members of the royal family.
Read full storyHeron Sanctuary Runs Up Huge Bill
A Heron sanctuary in Somerset has run up a huge bill.
Read full storyNightmare of unlimited free beer for students.
Student leaders were stunned when the brutality of the latest E.E.C. Directive began to sink in!...
Read full storyHarry Potter Shocker
Magician and legend, Harry Potter, has been diagnosed allergic to magic dust.
Read full storyMicrosoft apocolypse fear
An insider for Microsoft yesterday revealed to us that:...
Read full storyWar Dominates News
The terrorist attacks on America and war in Afghanistan is dominating the news so much that other important news is not being covered in the media. Government announcements, scandals and other necessary information are not being covered. This report...
Read full storyComposers To Face The Music
Composers around the world are in a state of shock this morning when it was announced that no more new tunes can be written.
Read full story"Bin Laden Most Wanted" Declares Fashion Victim
Fashion expert John Gaudie has said it is "quite right too" that Osama Bin Laden is the world's most wanted man. "I really want to get my hands on him" he said last night.
Read full storyStrike At Match Factory
Yesterday, a match factory in Wick, Scotland went on strike.
Read full storyFoot And Mouth Crisis Thickens
Cumbria farmer Arthur Sidebottom today shocked the agricultural community by suggesting radical reforms as the county's farmers prepare to restock their farms following the foot-and-mouth crisis.
Read full storyScientists Discover New Consonant on Mars!
Last week scientists at Jodrell Bank discovered a new consonant on Mars.
Read full storyMichael Schumacher guilty of alcohol abuse
Michael Schumacher's career hung in the balance last night following a French court ruling that the motor racing legend had been found guilty of alcohol abuse.
Read full storyCoffee Remains Unmade As Intern Numbers Fall
The National intern shortage worsened last night as new appointments fell for the third time in as many months.
Read full storyMan's Face Turns Sideways
A Bostonian man who always signs his e-mails with ;-) is in hospital today with a slipped face.Barry Large of Boston, Mass., reported feeling unwell late Thursday night. He telephoned is doctor to say his face felt "like it was turning sideways&...
Read full storyJohn Rocker pitches new album
Baseball reliever and bigot John Rocker has a new pitch. "If you want a piece of me buy my new CD". It seems the tempermental Rocker has a country side. His new CD, "Rock Ya to Sleep" hits stores next month.
Read full storyBighand Clocks Clock Clocking Out
The row over claims that NHS surgeons were manipulating waiting lists in order to comply with strict government guidelines continued today amid accusations that the clock in the waiting room of St James's Hospital, Leeds A and E department was ru...
Read full storyNellie May Go Back To Circus
After over 40 years in the jungle Nellie the elephant is said to be considering moving back to the circus.
Read full storyGloves Found in Glove Compartment
Bournemouth car dealer Nigel Duncan was still in a state of shock last night after finding gloves in a car's glove compartment.
Read full storyFloods! Don't Panic! Don't Panic!
Forget war in Afghanistan; forget AIDS in Africa; real news could affect your Little English selves! Summer's gone, and so it's time for localised flooding to take over the news. Small-scale damage will occur for a day or two in towns like...
Read full storyWestlife in original music shocker
Irish boy band Westlife have stunned the public by announcing that their latest album will be written entirely by themselves and will not be full of dreary ballads.
Read full story