Trump Cancels the 1848 Treaty of Guadalupe Hidalgo with Mexico
President Trump signed an executive order today to unilaterally cancel the 1848 Treaty of Guadalupe Hidalgo. Under the treaty at the end of the Mexican-American War, on July 4, 1848, the United States agreed to pay Mexico US$15 million for the lan...
Read full storyUS State Department Offers $10million 'Bounty' On Bin Laden Junior
World policeman, the United States of America, has taken it upon itself to, once again, do what it thinks it is entitled to do, to think for every man and woman, and to make decisions on behalf of every living soul on the planet, in order to ensure c...
Read full storyTrump sucks egg out of chicken during interview
As if the Trump presidency hadn't already provided us with enough surreal moments, an interview on the CNCB channel last night gave us a whole new dimension to his state of mind. While answering a question about trade embargoes with China, Trump...
Read full storyNorth Dakota and South Dakota To Merge Into One State
BISMARCK, North Dakota - The downward-spiraling economy has truly had an adverse affect on everyone and everything. CNN is reporting that due to the nation's economic woes the states of North Dakota and South Dakota have decided to merge into one...
Read full story
"It's Just Annexation, Everyone's Doing It!"
Trump Vows To Ban Arabic Numerals In Case They Have ISIS Sleeper Cell Ties
US sanctions against Russia begin - Chekhov to be written out of next "Star Trek" movie
A foreigners guide to the U.S. Election process - Part 1 Nomination
'Gone With The Windbag', starring Clark Cheney and Scarlett Obama opens today in a cinemas near you
Mexico To Send 5,200 Troops To US Border
US not as good at borrowing money!
Men Died After Eating Cabbage
NASA to Send Armed Rover to Mars
Campaign Replaces Statue of Liberty with Disrobing Ron Paul Girl
Stupid Slogans
Salsa Dancing Imperial Stormtroopers Rob Bank of America
Rosie and Dim - On the Roseanne Barr Fallout
TV creature Rosanne Barr has blamed a series of racist Tweets on a sedative she had been taking. As we wait for the judge to come back from recess in our trial (completely trumped up charges of multi million pound embezzlement, we can’t even spell embezzlement without auto correct) we had a look at what other celebrities blamed shit behaviour on. Tommy Robinson: Recently incarcerated racist pat...
Read full storyThe Best Dream He Ever Had
On reflection, he was more than happy that he had lived to experience such an event, however unreal it may have appeared at the time. He could see it all clearly now. Gazing up at the stars that seemed suddenly close and friendly he could not help but replay the scene over and over in his mind. To a stunned and packed Senate gathering President Barack Obama got slowly to his feet to announce th...
Read full story
Breaking news…
Interested in writing your own spoof news stories like these?
Yes, tell me more!Seven day catch up
Check out anything you've missed with the archive:
Illegal Immigration Solution Borders on Genius
EL PASO, TX (UPI)-U.S. Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE) officials are finalizing plans for a new strategy aimed at resolving the out-of-control illegal immigration dilemma plaguing America's workforce, economy and way of life.
Read full storyNew Blockbuster Bond Movie Set to Break Records
A new James Bond film is set to break all box office records. Called "Never Live Again Unless Once More Over The Eight" it sets out to give Bond a human face: Explained producer Erin Broccoli with his writer-director son Benjamin; "Well, we figured i...
Read full storyChristina Aguilera Leads Fight to Change America's National Anthem
Christina Aguilera has had enough of the criticism for her flubbing the Star-Spangled Banner during this year's Super Bowl. She claims that only a handful of Americans actually know all the words to the 'incredibly difficult and outdated' song and be...
Read full storyPepe and Hillary's One Year Re-Union at Club Lewinsky
It is obvious to myself, Pepe Warezabar, your roving reporter for The Guard Dog, that Hillary Clinton is alive to every nuance, every whisper of significance occurring in the known cosmos. So it was not surprising to me when we met for our one year re-union at her husband's favorite night club, The Lewinksy, that she would enquire about my health. The club was very noisy at this point with...
Read full storyCanadian Troops At US Border
US military chiefs are in a mild panic tonight, as Canadian troops continue to pour into Manitoba, with the intention of repatriating an area of the US totally detached from it, known as the Northwest Angle. The Northwest Angle is an area - essent...
Read full storyTrump: Kim Jong-un Handshake Injury Exclusive!
After the historic first ever man-to-man meeting between US President Donald Trump and North Korean dictator Kim Jong-un, in Singapore yesterday, Mr Trump had to request a visit from a local doctor last night after complaining of severe discomfort in...
Read full storyIraq Impregnated with Bastard Democracy After US Pulls Out Too Late
WASHINGTON, D.C. - Citizens celebrated Tuesday in the streets of Iraq as the U.S. began withdrawing its 130,000 troops from the troubled country. As it turns out, the celebration may be short lived, as America's violation of Iraqi sovereignty alread...
Read full storyRice and Webber back together for 'Basra's Burning' musical
Tim Rice and Andrew Lloyd Webber are to renew their partnership for what is being hailed as ‘the musical to end all musicals’. The pair who gave the world ‘Jesus Christ Superstar’ and ‘Evita’ have already penned the score for ‘Basra’s Burning’, a musical based around a humble Iraqi family and how America and Britain freed them from Saddam’s shackles of slavery.
Read full storyFunny America Headlines
-
Florida to be cut off from the US, said to make profile too sexist.
-
Katherine Harris declared Best Female Parody of 2006
-
US embargo on Cuba finally working
-
Arrogant 'Crypto-Nazi' William EffBuckley Jr. Felled by Very Large Word
-
World Unfair to US
-
'Lactics' stun Poopes; United back 'on top' of Face Sitting League.
-
Americans Change The Rules In Sports?
-
State of emergency declared by City of Denver as bomb doesn't go off
-
Scientists Warn U.S. Could Be Cut In Half!
-
Trump Administration Plagued by Technical Difficulties; Prayerful Vice President Remains Cool Under Pressure
-
Bush Tax Plan: Give Em a Break
-
Preliminary Tests Indicate That Moammar Gadhafi and Yoko Ono May Be Same Person
-
More Dumsfeld Backward Speak, America's Word Warrior Spews Anew
-
Bush declares war on Mother Nature!
-
British Tourist Experiences First Hand 'The Moslemisation Of The USA'
-
Here She Comes...
-
'You've got me under your thumb, so deep in the heart you're really a part of me . . . '
-
Grumpy Cat Will Replace David Letterman! Fans Go Crazy!
-
Costs-Benefits Luncheon on Capitol Hill... Obama.
-
Trump stands down (and then up again)
