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Funny satire stories about America

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Funny story: America Loves You, Bitch

America Loves You, Bitch

Haiti is tied to America’s whipping post. America is not a racist country. America loves you. Won’t you buy goods and services from America? They love all their allies and are willing to love their enemies too. The USA always wants to gain control…

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Funny story: M.A.D. About Red, White, Blue

M.A.D. About Red, White, Blue

During the good old days of the Cold War, there was a thing the Americans and Soviet invented called “Mutually-Assured Destruction” or M.A.D. This came about when both side had enough nuclear missiles to blow the frick outa each other, and take the r…

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Funny story: American “Freedom” Still Not For Everyone

American “Freedom” Still Not For Everyone

Given the extreme hatred of women in the USA, philosophy majors and Starbucks baristas are all wondering if Republican-led states will essentially become prison camps for women and other “people” not seen as people by Christian MAGAs. Will such st…

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Funny story: Amerika Über Alles

Amerika Über Alles

The suede denim secret police are coming. Militias throughout America are preparing – or “prepping”, as they like to say, (short form is way cooler than the whole world, that's how you know you're not unedamacated) – for a coming war. Will there…

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Funny story: Dumpster Fire World

Dumpster Fire World

No, it’s not a new addition to Disneyland, it’s an upcoming classification of certain countries in the world. There’s the First World (who call themselves more civilized than other ‘worlds’, and are, thus, less civilized, being snobs, to put it li…

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Funny story: Basil Blathering Visits America - 'Trumpheads' Everywhere

Basil Blathering Visits America - 'Trumpheads' Everywhere

This is Basil, from Ye Olde Church News - sent on a fact finding mission to America. (Plus making it a paid vacation. ) We hear such alarming news of our American bretheran - that the Religious over here are going crazy. It is all true. Ever…

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Funny story: The Banana Republic and Its Tarantulas

The Banana Republic and Its Tarantulas

Some have said – possibly Ron DeSantis – that America has now been turned into a banana republic after Mar-A-Lago got raided by the FBI. Others have said that America was turned into a big banana when Trump campaigned to become Head Banana. So…

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Funny story: Untied States of Trumperica

Untied States of Trumperica

If Trump gets back in come 2024, one of his secret promises has been not only to move the White House to Florida, but also to change the name of America itself. No longer will it be the “United” states, but the “‘Untied” states, since Trump will p…

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Funny story: America is …

America is …

America, you are like the annoying house guest who just won’t go the fuck home, even when the host and hostess are in their PJs and have turned off the lights but kept the front door unlocked hoping you’d take the hint. America is the annoying nei…

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Funny story: Chinese Villager Tells Of A Weird Country Called America - Far Across Ocean

Chinese Villager Tells Of A Weird Country Called America - Far Across Ocean

(A young villager from China returned from America - tells his friends about America.) All the men carry guns, and-walking, or in a car-shoot each other if one makes a small social mistake. They must have a license for the car - for safety reaso…

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Funny story: The Taliban President of Afghanistan Is Sending 300 Soldiers To Defend Ukraine Against The Russian Invaders

The Taliban President of Afghanistan Is Sending 300 Soldiers To Defend Ukraine Against The Russian Invaders

KABUL, Afghanistan – (Satire News) – Afghanistan’s new president Abu Taboo Fashu, has informed the news media that he has ordered 300 crack Taliban soldiers to fly to the Ukraine and join the American’s, the British, and the Cambodian troops in defen…

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Funny story: Renaming the US of A?

Renaming the US of A?

I was appalled, yes appalled, to learn, from the prestigious Smithsonian Magazine, that Amerigo Vespucci, that man for whom America was named, was a pimp from Florence, Italy--a pimp, yes a pimp, who procured women for paying clients and got a cut of…

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Funny story: The US and Mexico Agree To The Greatest Trade Deal In US-Mexico History!

The US and Mexico Agree To The Greatest Trade Deal In US-Mexico History!

NUEVO LAREDO, Mexico – (Satire News) – President Joe Biden of Mexico and President Andres “Andy” Manuel Lopez Obrador of Mexico met in Nuevo Laredo's famed Fernando Valenzuela Bullring, to iron out one of the greatest trade deals between the United S…

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Funny story: The Taliban and The United States Work Out a Camels For iPhones Trade

The Taliban and The United States Work Out a Camels For iPhones Trade

WASHINGTON, D.C. – (Satire News) – The Omnium Gatherum News Agency has just learned that Afghanistan’s Taliban faction will be shipping to the US, 900 one-humped camels, in exchange for 3,000 used iPhones. The trade is believed to be one of the mo…

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Funny story: Sexual Intercourse Has Gone Down Drastically in 37 States

Sexual Intercourse Has Gone Down Drastically in 37 States

PAWTUCKET, Rhode Island – (Satire News) – Recent studies conducted at Pawtucket’s prestigious Paul Revere University have shown that the incidence of sexual intercourse has gone down in 37 of the 50 states. Professor Wilmington F. Fissaletti, 74,…

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Funny story: Call It Botox For America Or The Infrastructure Bill?

Call It Botox For America Or The Infrastructure Bill?

What is Biden’s $3 trillion Infrastructure Bill? Who cares? Sounds boring, go away, snooze time. For starters, think of the Golden Gate bridge splitting in half and cars falling into the waters. Got your attention? Do you drive across bridges o…

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Funny story: The United States Has Closed The US-Canadian Border

The United States Has Closed The US-Canadian Border

WASHINGTON, D.C. – (Satire News) – After much consideration the United States Department of Animals has decided to close the US-Canadian border due to the fact that Canada has flat out refused to have their extensive moose population neutered or spay…

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