GREEN BAY, Wisconsin - (Satire News) - NASCAR sexpot Danica Patrick informed The Left Coast Mirror's Tequila Tallyho that she is concerned about the fact that she has developed a big callous on her NASCAR brake foot. The race car divaette, who is…
PARIS, France - (FIFA Satire) - Sports Bet Gazette reporter Zorro La Bamba has just broken the story that Roger Goodell, commissioner of the NFL has instructed the FIFA World Cup Committee to stop using the name "Football" and start referring to it b…
CALEXICO, California - (Satire News) - The Cosmos News Service reports that Calexico's St. Sylvester Church has just been named "The Prettiest Church in California." CNS writer Armada Aquatica said that the church, which was built in 1799, is 223…
PARIS, France - (Sports Satire) - The FIFA World Cup Organization, after getting lots of feedback, has decided to hold the world soccer event every two years, instead of every four. Out of the 211 members, a total of 209 voted to go to the every t…
LONDON - (Satire News) - The BBC reports that queen consort Camilla Parker Bowles accidentally revealed what her hubby, King Charles III, earns per year. The Mrs. King Charles III, was talking with BBC reporter Oceana Figgly about the new UK hair…
HOUSTON - (Satire News) - Scandal Today writer Cheyenne Patio states that the most arrogant, sarcastic, jerk in politics, Sen Ted Cruz, cryingly told her that contrary to rampant rumors, he did not beat his 17-year-old daughter Morticia Bruja Cruz wi…
QATAR - - Sports Bet Gazette reporter Zorro La Bamba writes that in all of the decades that he has covered the World Cup games he has never seen a team manager do what the French national team manager did. La Bamba stated that at the 69-minute mar…
ROTTEN PEACHES, Georgia - (Satire News) - The Watchdog News Agency reports that the GOP candidate who was backed by Donald "The Nazi" Trump has gotten his fat ass stomped in the Georgia senate race. Herschel Walker, who has admitted to fathering 1…
CHICAGO - (Satire News) - Boom Boom News reporter Hacienda Fiddle has just announced that a Windy City Hooters waitress has captured "The Best Hooters (Tits) In America Contest." 24-year-old Miffy Knockapello, of Cicero, easily won the boob contes…
MANHATTAN, New York - (Satire News) - Sarah Ferguson is one very physically active woman. The infamous Duchess of York is 63, but her recent suitors ages 39-62 all agreed that she has the sensuously erotic body of a woman 33. According to Dail…
QATAR - (Sports Satire) - Qatar police have reported that World Cup security guards found a B-13 bomb near the dressing room of the Argentinian team. A rep for the Qatar police said that the bomb is the same type that President Putin's troops are…
QATAR - (Sports Satire) - Brazil's superstar Eric Cantona spoke with Sportsapalooza writer Pia Confetti and they talked about beer, wine, pizza, the Brazilian rain forest, Hostess Twinkies, and pussy. Cantona is noted for being quite the player wh…
BOSTON - (Magazine Satire) - The Boston Evening Moon's senior reporter Sigmund Cottonseed, reports that the most hateful, evil, predator in the nation has just had his face slapped big time. Several patrons at the McDonalds located on One If By La…
MEXICO CITY - (Satire News) - The president of Mexico, Andres "Andy" Manuel Lopez Obrador, has just announced that the Republic of Mexico will be sending the destroyer "Pancho Villa" to assist Ukraine in its war with the invading bastard commies.
CLEVELAND, Ohio - (Satire News) - Metro News Service reporter Joaquin Cerveza has just reported that the twice-impeached, one-term disgraced ex-president Donald Trump, has just been named The American Racist Federation's "2022 Racist of The Year."…
LONDON - (Satire News) - BBC reporter Tyrus Bottomfiddle has been embedded with the 707th Queen's Elite Infantry Regiment for the past two months. He recently reported that 92% of the regiment's troops are extremely depressed and they want to retu…
NEW YORK CITY - (Satire News) - GOPicky Magazine reports that the biggest fucking liar in the history of fucking liars, Donald Jonathan Erasmus Trump, has stated that he will be donating $800,000 to help rebuild the UK's Adolf Hitler Museum. The N…
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