WASHINGTON, D.C. - (Satire News) - Kitty Segovia, with The iNews News Agency has just broken the story that Russian dictator Vladimir Nikita Putin, is feeling so much fucking heat from the people of Russia that he has decided to leave Ukraine and ret…
LITTLE ROCK, Arkansas - (Satire News) - News Blues reporter Velveeta Maracas, reports that after interviewing the newly-elected governor of Arkansas, she can say that she is just as hate-filled, and as just as evil as her idol Donald Jonathan Erasmus…
HOLLYWOOD - (Satire News) - Hollywood Hors D'oeuvre's reporter Tahiti Zeppelin reports that the cutest transgender dog in the USA is named Fufi Fondue. Fufi who belongs to female impersonator RuPaul, beat out a group of 69 canines to win the covet…
VESTABOL, Russia - (Satire News) - Word coming out of southern Russia is that the communist town of Piffinchev, has been captured by the Ukraine's 903 Infantry Regiment. The Kremlin Voice reports that the 903rd is made up entirely of Ukrainian fem…
LITTLE ROCK, Arkansas - (Satire News) - The newly-elected Republican governor of Arkansas, Sarah "Chubby" Huckabee Sanders has just become the nation's fattest governor. Huck-San, as Democrats and Independents call the big old Lard Bucket, won on…
NEW YORK CITY - (Satire News) - The New York Police Dept. reports that Donald Jonathan Erasmus Trump has just been taken into custody at JFK Airport. Federal agents report apprehending the orange whore bitch as he was in line to get on board a fli…
DALLAS - (Sports Satire) - Reporter Tortilla Torres with The Sports Mirror has just revealed that a Dallas Cowboys cheerleader, just spoke with her and informed her that she has resigned from the world-famous cheerleading squad. Madison Powergate,…
TAMPA BAY, Florida - (Sports Satire) - Sportsapalooza writer Pia Confetti, spoke with Bucs quarterback Tom Brady, and he revealed a very interesting observation. Even though his team finished the NFL season with a lowly 8-9 regular season record,…
TALLALHASSEE, Florida - (Satire News) - Word coming out of The Plywood State is that Gov. Ron DeSantis has just issued a mandate stating that he wants the twice impeached, presidential election "Loser" to vacate Mar-a-Lago and leave the state as soon…
WASHINGTON, D.C. - (Satire News) - White House Press Secretary Karine Jean-Pierre has informed the US news media that Mexico is reporting that their destroyer, The Pancho Villa, has attacked and sunk one of Russia's largest battleships, The Siberian…
BOISE, Idaho - (Satire News) - The Idaho state senate has listened to the citizens of the Potato State, and they have voted to ban ribbed condoms. State Senator Gardenia P. Kryler, 47, of Idaho Falls, said that she has always hated having her husb…
WASHINGTON, D.C. - (Satire News) - Pico de Gallo with Tittle Tattle Tonight reports that Washington, D.C.'s most eligible bachelorette has just gone in to get some female bikini landscaping done. The famed, award-winning TTT reporter said that he…
FRANKFORT, KENTUCKY - (Satire News) - BuzzFuzz has just stated that the Kentucky state legislature has just voted to expand the 3-second rule. Taffeta Kixx with BuzzFuzz noted that the 3-second rule, which has been in effect in the the US since Wo…
MAR-A-LAGO - (Satire News) - The Miami Globe-Gazette Newspaper reports that federal agents from the FBI recently conducted a pre-dawn raid on Trump's Mar-a-Lago complex. Agent in charge Clayburn D. Ryburn told the news media that agents confiscate…
BANGKOK, Thailand - (Satire News) - The QuinniPinni Polling Agency (Asia) has revealed an amazingly amazing fact. A recent poll taken in over 250 Thai cities showed that Thailand has more transgenders (males who are called Ladyboys) than any other…
BALTIMORE - (Satire News) - Sen Marjorie Taylor Greene who says she is enjoying the hell out of being divorced told Tilapia Frisbee with RumorLand News that her vajayjay (pussy) has never seen so much 'fucking' action. The blonde senator, who has…
HOLLYWOOD - (Satire News) - Sen. Marjorie Taylor Greene, who is recently divorced, has been saying that she's sick and tired of all the rampant rumors that are flying out of the countless rumor mills scattered throughout the nation. The 48-year-ol…
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