CLEVELAND, Ohio – The Duchess Disinfecting Company has stated that their cleaning products are powerful cleaning disinfectants and they should never, ever be ingested orally or otherwise. The company’s Chief Director of Public Relations, Olivia Ti...
NEW YORK CITY - Fox News reporter Tucker Carlson interviewed Judge Jeanine Pirro regarding the recent rumors that she had been drinking while on the air. The judge became quite upset, and told him that it was not beer, nor whiskey, nor tequila, bu...
WASHINGTON, D.C. – President Trump has said that the $1,200 Economic Impact Checks have all been mailed out. A spokesman for the anti-Trump group calling itself the Never-Trump Organization told the media that none of their more than 65,000 member...
NEW YORK CITY – The National Institute of Births has just released statistics that show that the nation can expect a huge spike in baby births in January (nine months from now). NIB Executive Director, Dr. Grover Kimkullen, said that with the new...
NEW YORK CITY - Nicolle Wallace served as communications director under President George W. Bush. The former staunch Republican woman says that she has had her fill of DJT, who she opines is 73 going on 3. Wallace, said that she is afraid that...
HURRICANE BEACH, Florida – In what local residents are calling a very unpopular decision in this day of the Coronavirus, the Florida Beach Authority has decided to reopen Hurricane Beach. When life-time resident, Trixie Belle Stufflebaum, 91, hear...
WASHINGTON, D.C. – President Trump stated at his daily C-19 Press Conference/Campaign Pep Rally that he hopes everyone appreciates that he has just given them a very nice monetary present. Trump stuck out his chest and said that he wants to show h...
CHICAGO – The Coronavirus has really changed the way a lot of people are doing a lot of things. People are having to shelter-in-place, self-isolate, stay home, hide in the closet, and practice safe-distancing. The Condom Council of North Americ...
MANHATTAN – Former anchorwoman, Megyn Kelly, says that she is tired of being cooped up in her multi-million dollar apartment. The former darling of Fox News and NBC told her husband that she is still upset with Don Lemon, and how he disrespected h...
VALDOSTA, Georgia – The Georgia Chapter of the KKK has sent out a newsletter with some vital info for their members. The newsletter addresses the concern of the older members, who are becoming a bit nervous regarding the Coronavirus. One membe...
HONG KONG – The Chinese Press is reporting that a restaurant in Hong Kong put up a sign stating that blacks cannot enter the eatery. A lawyer representing former NBA basketball player, LeShontay Maypole, said that he and his wife, LaQuaneesha, tri...
LOS ANGELES – All of the late night talk show hosts have been doing their shows from their homes due to the Coronavirus pandemic. Jimmy Kimmel said that the sheltering-in-place is causing him to hallucinate and become extremely depressed. He to...
DETROIT – President Trump’s chief counselor Kellyanne Conway was in the Motor City visiting one of her sisters-in-law, Consuelo Conway. She was asked by a reporter with the Detroit Daily Divulger about a rumor that had been making the rounds that...
NEW YORK CITY – The man known as the “Bern” went on live stream and endorsed the man known as “Capt. Blue Collar.” Bernie Sanders said that if he had to endure another four years of Trump’s Day Care presidency, he thinks that he would rather move...
ANNAPOLIS, Maryland – Ivanka Trump, the oldest of Trump’s two daughters, was speaking before a group of Republican women who call themselves Lesbians For Trump. She told them that her daddy embraces all kinds of women. She giggled and said that sh...
WASHINGTON, D.C. – George Conway, who is one of the directors of the national Dump Trump 2020 movement, was quoted in The Washington Post-Express as saying that the president recently paid out some hush money. Conway, who is married to the presid...
CHICAGO – Recent polls report that STD numbers are at the lowest level that they have been since March of 2003. The figures clearly show that, since so many individuals are now sheltering-in-place, the incidences of vodie oh doeing have just about...
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