WASHINGTON, D.C. – Reports filtering out of the George and Kellyanne Conway household, state that Kellyanne is totally stressed out over her daughter’s verbal attacks on POTUS. Claudia Conway, stated that the "Pied Piper of the Potomac" has about…
CUSTER, South Dakota – The news media is reporting that Jonathan Penna, also known as Chief Cow Lick, has stated that he and his group, known as Red Lives Matter, want George Washington to be taken off Mount Rushmore. They state that it is only fa…
WASHINGTON, D.C. – President Trump told Sean Hannity that he wants to have a statue of himself commissioned. POTUS stated that he would be dressed as a Civil War Confederate general, while sitting majestically on a majestic Civil War horse. He…
WASHINGTON, D.C. – The President says that the reports that appeared in the Chicago Daily Wind newspaper about him doubling the taxes of members of the Black Lives Matter organization, are simply not true. “Lies, put out by Nancy Pelosi, Robert De…
LOS ANGELES – Javier Hernandez Balcazar, better known as Chicharito (the Little Pea), recently told the Los Angeles Sports-Chronicle that he is seriously thinking about purchasing his old team, Manchester United. Chicharito, who owns a chain of Hu…
CARPINTERIA, California – Soccer great, David Beckham, has just stated that he cannot get soccer out of his blood. Beckham played for the L.A. Galaxy between 2007 and 2012. The retired superstar was recently approached by the athletic director for…
NEW YORK CITY – The coach of the Trump University Titans football team, has just stated that that they are cancelling the 2020 collegiate football season. Coach Bilbo “Ding Dong” Shasta, 74, stated that the reason is not because 24 of the players…
POSSUM BELLY, Mississippi – RumorLand News is reporting that one of the chapters of the Ku Klux Klan, has just announced that they are planning on going into Harlem, New York, and distributing Confederate flags to the residents, free of charge. Wh…
BOSTON, Massachusetts – The officials with the Miss Massachusetts Beauty Pageant regret that they are having to cancel this year’s state beauty contest. Pageant director, Meryl "Gams" Kinderhook, 46, informed the media that, during the all-nude bo…
IRVINE, California - The In-N-Out hamburger chain commented that they do not recall sex pervert Ghislaine Maxwell ever eating at their establishment as she has stated. Maxwell told one of the jail guards who is guarding her that her favorite hambu…
HOLLYWOOD – Hip-Hop Rapper Kanye West, who is married to Kim Kardashian, has just thrown his durag into the presidential ring, and stated that he wants to be the nation's second black president. Westy, as Tucker Carlson calls him, says that he is…
SAN FRANCISCO – Members of the newly-formed Pink Lives Matter movement have announced plans for a big entertainment whoop-dee-do, as they say down in Nawlins (New Orleans). Organizers, Bruce Figwater and Myron Tutu, have informed the media that th…
WASHINGTON, D.C. – The President of the United States has again shown that he is addicted to lying. As many have said, the man could not tell the truth if he was offered 50 Big Macs. His brain is programmed to lie, lie, lie, and lie a whole bun…
WASHINGTON, D.C. – A White House insider has informed the news media about Trump’s latest Mount Rushmore idea. The President, who is, perhaps, the most conceited individual since tennis player, John McEnroe, will sign a presidential executive orde…
NEW YORK CITY – More than 200 residents who reside in Trump Tower say that they are sick and tired of having to view the 15-foot-tall statue of Donald Trump that sits in the building’s lobby. They say that it looks stupid, with Trump holding a nin…
MANCHESTER, New Hampshire – One of the most evil women in history has just been arrested, and is now sitting in jail. Ghislaine Maxwell, (#6903517) who was the girlfriend of the most perverted pervert on Earth, Jeffrey Epstein, was arrested as she…
MOSCOW – Word coming out of the Kremlin has put a great happy ‘bigly’ smile on President Trump’s face. A recent poll, that was actually taken inside the Kremlin, shows that Trump is ahead of Joe Biden by 83 percentage points. American poll expe…
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