Flaccidia, world's smallest and underwhelming country considers name change
Flaccidia, that not-very-impressive country located east of Portugal but west of China, is considering a name change to rectify its unfortunate reputation as the baby carrot of nations. Prime Minister Justus MacPolo explained, "We're actually a bi…
Read full storyGov. Greg "Eggplant" Abbott has been arrested for reckless wheelchair driving
In a bizarre turn of events, Governor Greg "Wheelchair Willie" Abbott found himself in handcuffs after being charged with reckless driving while operating his wheelchair. The governor, bearing an uncanny resemblance to a rotten eggplant, attempted…
Read full storyLiberal Democrats won't disturb you again, until the next time
Although they have met once or twice in the pub in the past few weeks, your local Liberal Democrat will not be disturbing you again, at least not until the next time. William Gavinson, a spokesperson from Chutney-on-the-Fritz's Liberal Democrat gr…
Read full storyTiffany Trump says her father deserves to go to prison
The latest revelation from writer Margarita Mixx of Wild Whispers magazine exposes Tiffany Trump's candid thoughts on her father's predicament. According to Mixx's report, during a visit to Mar-a-Lago, Tiffany confronted her father, saying he dese…
Read full storyRoyal submarine, the HMS Sea Scoundrel, hits a school of orca whales and receives heavy damage
Ta Ta For Now News reveals that the royal submarine, HMS Sea Scoundrel II, has sustained extensive damage after an unexpected collision with a pod of orca whales. The submarine's commander, none other than Prince Harry, Duke of Sussex, 38, explain…
Read full storyThe FBI says that Trump has already been fitted for handcuffs
According to Andy Cohen, America's renowned information guru, an interesting revelation has surfaced about former president, the Trumpturd. It appears that DJT has already undergone a rather unique fitting process, this time involving handcuffs. C…
Read full storyThe sexy Kardashian sisters are now the proud owners of a hot dog food truck
The Kardashian sisters continue to expand their business empire, venturing into various unconventional products. However, their latest venture, The Horny Hot Dog Food Truck, takes the cake. Family matriarch, Kris Jenner, proudly announced the sist…
Read full storyWillie Nelson turns 90 and says that he feels like he's 31
Legendary Texan musician, Willie "Mr. Weed" Nelson, continues to show that age is just a number with his vibrant spirit and unique lifestyle. According to reports, the 90-year-old music icon attributes his longevity to his morning ritual of prepar…
Read full storyMajor League Baseball will now issue fines to players who spit their chewing tobacco on the dugout floor
The Sports Bet Gazette is reporting that MLB Commissioner Rob "The Man" Manfred is sick and tired of having to pay millions of dollars to remove nasty, vulgar, sickening tobacco juice stains from the floors of MLB dugouts. Manfred has issued a pro…
Read full storyA knuckleball pitcher for Swamp State College throws a 4-0 no-hitter against Ohio State
In a stunning upset, the underdog Swamp State Crocodiles triumphed over the formidable Ohio State Buckeyes baseball team, as reported by Sportsapalooza journalist Pia Confetti. Confetti highlighted the extraordinary performance of 18-year-old fres…
Read full storyReports from the FBI are that the entire Trump family could possibly all end up in prison
The Trump family may soon be fronting a different kind of reality TV show as reports suggest their potential residence could shift from Mar-a-Lago to a federal prison. According to sources at The American Research Group, the FBI's investigations h…
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