Global Warming Will Put An End To People Buying Black Cars and Black Trucks
When it is 120 degrees out every summer - who is going to own a fancy $60, 000 black truck, or a black muscle care with windows illegally tinted totally dark black? We are going to have a revolution - all cars - if we still use cars - will be whit…
Read full storyPronouns, JK Rowling, and Gen Y – Not Silent, But Deadly!
I put on my Hercule Poirot hat and did some investigating. I wanted to know where these pronouns came from. (Yes, I know, they came from the gradual evolution of the English language. Or language in general. When the first cave man and cave women…
Read full storyGetting A Job in the Age of the App
I’m old school. I print off resumes and walk them in the front door of where I want a job. But I jest kint git no jobs! HR Interviewers ask me these bizarre questions: “What’s your Twitter/Instagram/Facebook?” I reply: I’m looking for a j…
Read full storyStephen Curry of The World Champion Golden State Warriors Buys His 3-Year-Old a Clear Mouthpiece Just Like The One He Uses
SAN FRANCISCO - (Satire News) - The NBA world champion Golden State Warriors are happy to report that their super star MVP player has decided to pass up the fabulous offer that was offered to him by the owner of The Boston Celtics. Curry told Sher…
Read full storyTed Cruz Says He Has No Idea How The 183 Opioid Pills Got In His Political Attache Case
TIJUANA, Mexico - (Satire News) - Ted "Dracula" Cruz fled the US once again (with his two semi-cute daughters in tow) to avoid the fierce 158 MPH winds of Hurricane Cinderella. Cruz has a history for tucking his tail between his legs and going dow…
Read full storyTrump Women to Bare All in Playboy Magazine
The Trump Family has done a YUGE deal with Playboy Magazine (it still exists? In paper?) for three Trump women to appear nude in a super-spread of an upcoming issue. Melania, Ivanka, and Tiffany will all get a chance to take it off. However, Donal…
Read full storyThe Reason Why A French Tennis Player Was Disqualified From The Wimbledon Tournament
WIMBLEDON, England - (Satire News) - The Wimbledon Tennis Tournament Guild (WTTG) has finally announced why French tennis player Claude Jean Du Poupon, 27, was disqualified. According to France's Ooh La La News Agency, Du Poupon, who has a temper…
Read full storyThe Latest Poll Shows That 91% of All Republican Evangelicals Say Trump Is Going To Hell
WATERLOO, Iowa - (Satire News) - The latest QuinniPinni Poll clearly shows that the hate-spewing Trumptard's supporters are dropping like ants at an insect spray factory. In fact, the Q Poll shows without a shadow of a doubt that not only are "Don…
Read full storyA Fantastic Rugby Player Who Plays For The Great Britain National Rugby Team Has Been Signed By The Dallas Cowboys
DALLAS, Texas - (Sports Satire) - The Sports Bet Gazette is reporting that one of the greatest players to ever play for the Great Britain National Rugby Team, has just been signed by the world-famous Dallas Cowboys. Cowboys owner Jerry Jones has s…
Read full storyThe Tannagoosa Crime Family From Kansas City Tells Rep. Jim Jordan To Stop Lying and Acting Like An Effeminate Version of Trump or Else They'll Neuter Him
KANSAS CITY, Missouri - (Satire News) - National Focus Magazine has just broken the story that the infamous Tannagoosa Crime Family of Kansas City is not happy with GOP asshole Jim "Fruity Pebbles" Jordan. Durango Tucker with NFM spoke with family…
Read full storyNew Zealand Is Changing Its Name
WELLINGTON, New Zealand - (Satire News) - After several attempts the down under country of New Zealand has finally voted to change its name. President Jacinda "You Go Girl" Arden, the president of New Zealand, said that after talking about it for…
Read full storyPresident Biden Signs a Presidential Executive Order Forcing The Inhabitants of Red States To Pay 29.3% More Taxes
WASHINGTON, D.C. - (Satire News) - President Biden says that he has just about had his fill of one Donald Jonathan Erasmus Trump's incessant bellyaching that the election was stolen, that Pelosi is an illegal alien from Japan, and that his dick (Trum…
Read full storyDonald Trump Finally Admits That He's An Atheist!
ALLIGATOR NUTS, Florida - (Satire News) - After years and years of acting like he was a church-going person, Trump has finally admitted that he has not set foot in a church in 41½ years. He said that he relishes that he was not only able to fool t…
Read full storyMcDonalds Reports That The Sales of Their McAvocado Twinkies Are Setting Sales Records
CICERO, Illinois - (Satire News) -McDonalds has always been at the forefront of new fast food menu items. They had great success with their McSushiburger, their McEnchiladas, their McTofuburger, and their most recent McGuacamole Muffin. And no…
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