Texas Is Sending 900 Bulldozers To Fight The Out-of-Control California Wild Fires
AUSTIN – (Satire News) – The Texas Senate has announced that they have agreed to send 900 fire-fighting bulldozers to help fight the dozens of fast-moving wild fires in the Left Coast state. Senator Harmon K. Finstermund, a Democrat from Nacogdoch…
Read full storyThe New Taliban Regime Plans on Invading Pakistan
KABUL, Afghanistan – (World Satire) – The CIA has just intercepted a message that the new Taliban regime has decided to invade neighboring Pakistan. The message was sent by Taliban General Abdali Tibia Nim-Nim to Taliban spokesperson Sabeen Siri Y…
Read full storyIt's Switzerland's Turn To Invade Afghanistan
Switzerland is about to invade Afghanistan. The reasoning is Afghanistan must be invaded by someone, and Switzerland felt they had to get into the action before Canada or Finland. And besides, what else does Switzerland have to do all day besides…
Read full storyNeurologist: Senior Members Of GOP Should Have Heads Examined
A leading authority of neurology believes some leaders of the Republican Party should have their heads examined for signs of cerebral damage, much like those performed post mortem on athletes suspected of having Chronic Traumatic Encephalopathy (CTE)…
Read full storyKimberly Guilfoyle Has Become Known as The Puerto Rican Linda Lovelace, The Infamous Porn Actress, Who Starred in The X-Rated Hard-Core Film "Deep Throat"
CHATTANOOGA, Tennessee – (Satire News) – Bedroom Pillow Talk's Carolina Chipotle, reports that Donald Trump Jr’s., girlfriend, Kimberly Guilfoyle, traveled to Tennessee to visit an ex-boyfriend, who owes her $13,805. While there she spoke at a ral…
Read full storyDonald Trump Is MIA
MAR-a-LAGO, Florida – (Satire News) – Ivanka Trump is worried shitless as she cannot find her daddy, aka “The Pussy Grabber.” The 6-foot-tall daughter of Donald and Matilda Elmira Trump says that she last saw her father in Mar-a-Lago’s Emperor Hir…
Read full storyToyota Using Ass-Kicking Taliban in New Ads
Tokyo, Japan - The Toyota Motor Corporation unleashed a new commercial today, marketed towards Authoritarian regimes and Dictators around the globe. The commercial plays heavily on the recent success of the Taliban in Afghanistan. A victory that c…
Read full storyThe Real Reasons Why The New England Patriots Released QB Cam Newton
GILLETTE, Massachusetts – (Sports Satire) – Many sports pundits had predicted that NFL quarterback, Cam Newton was bound to get cut by the Patriots. The rumors around the locker room were that the Pats powers-that-be and Coach Bilichick, were just…
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