
A Javelin Thrower From Zimbabwe Arrested In The Possession of An Illegal Blow Gun
TOKYO – (Satire News) – Summer Olympic officials were shocked beyond belief when a routine search of the Zimbabwe Olympic team turned up an illegal blowgun. The blowgun known commercially as the Zebra Z-19, is extremely dangerous and unlike most t…
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The Alabama Supreme Court Rules That Nudity Is Not Nakedness
MONTGOMERY, Alabama – (Satire News) – The Supreme Court of Alabama ruled by a vote of 9 to 3, that nudity does not constitute nakedness. State Supreme Court Judge Woodley “Stonewall” Jackson, stated that the 9-year-old case of Maggie Scotchmist vs…
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All The Details on The Blake Shelton and Gwen Stefani Country-Style Wedding of The Decade
TISHOMINGO, Oklahoma – (Satire News) – Boom Boom News reporter Hacienda Fiddle was invited to attend the country western wedding of the decade on Blake Shelton's 13,716 acre Yippee-Ki-Yay Ranch. After six years of living together, country singers…
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Trump’s Hair Stylist Says That DJT Told Him That He Regrets Not Having Appointed Himself King
NEW YORK CITY – (Satire News) – Donald Trump’s long-time hairstylist Francois "FiFi" Flambeau, recently appeared on The Ellen DeGeneres Show, and revealed that the former resident of 1600 Pennsylvania, confided to him that he really and truly regrets…
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The Universe Apologizes for 689 Million Who Still Live in Poverty Worldwide
Associated Press--Details leaked out today that at a support group for anger management for deities, one of its attendees, the Universe, was heard to admit while tearing up that he was “so sorry” for the 689 million people worldwide who still live in…
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McDonald’s Latest New Menu Food Item Is An Astounding Hit!
CHICAGO – (Satire News) – Corporate officials with McDonalds took the suggestion from San Francisco native, VP Kamala Harris and they have added a new menu item, which has gone through the roof. The vice-president, who says she eats an average of…
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The US Bureau of Weather Has Just Condemned Death Valley Because of The Extreme Heat
DEATH VALLEY, California – (Satire News) – In an unprecedented decision, the US Bureau of Weather has just issued a directive condemning Death Valley. A spokeswoman for the USBW, stated that with the daily temperatures hitting the 160s, the agency…
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Meghan McCain Has Been Fired By “The View”
NEW YORK CITY – (Satire News) – Well it’s finally official, the GOP mouthpiece, Meghan McCain will no longer make her incendiary political comments on the long running talk show “The View.” An insider, who spoke on condition of anonymity, stated t…
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Sad News: Polls Say 18-24 Year Olds Aren’t As Patriotic and Religious as Their Unhinged Trumper Parents
Washington - Older White Americans were surprised to learn that people in the 18-24 age range did not share their enthusiasm for all things patriotic and evangelical. Caucasian baby boomers, a group that overwhelmingly approves of a wannabe dictat…
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A Member of The Taliban Found Working At a Jack-in-the-Box Drive-Thru Window In Baltimore
BALTIMORE – (Satire News) – The FBI has reported that they have just captured the infamous Taliban director of covert external operations. FBI Agent Thurman W. Glassmaker, informed the news media that Abu Bak Fu Mufumi, 31, has been sailing under…
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Biden Dog Major To Sell MADGA Hats
After graduating from Trump University with a degree in sales, Biden’s dog, Major, decided to go into business manufacturing dog hats labeled Make American Dogs Great Again. This brought an explosion from Trump lawyer Rudolph Giuliani. “We’ll sue…
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90 Year Old Bulgarian Shot Putter Claims Hunter Biden Tried To Steal Her Dentures
BILLINGSGATE POST: “Pardon me. But can I borrow your teeth?” While campaigning in a rural area of West Virginia in 2019, Joe Biden was unable to keep his chain of thought as he read from his Teleprompter. There was an elderly lady in the front row w…
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