Britain's first nail bar for dogs opens
Many businesses have been forced to shut down during the pandemic, some of them permanently. But not all shops are suffering badly. This week in Chaffinch St Cock, Britain's first nail bar for dogs opened. Canine Chaffinch Nails is subject to the…
Read full storyA Fox News Insider Reports That Maria Bartiromo and Jeanine Pirro Can’t Stop Crying
NEW YORK CITY – (Satire News) – A Fox News insider, who did not want her name disclosed (Laura Ingraham), informed Boom Boom News reporter Hacienda Fiddle that Maria Bartiromo and Jeanine Pirro haven’t been able to stop sobbing ever since fellow Foxe…
Read full storyCouple regret starting a Jason Statham Film Marathon
Chutney on the Fritz couple Gary and Lorraine have begun to regret their plan to watch all of Jason Statham's films during the lockdown. 'I knew he had done a few films,' said Gary. 'I mean, there were the three Expendables films, the one with Mir…
Read full storyTraffic Cone now knows all of student's boring life choices
Traffic cone Peter Smith now knows everything that student Conrad Barrington does, as the two have been sharing house space since September. 'It all seemed like so much fun at first ' said Peter. 'I just minded my own business at the end of a road…
Read full storySpinster buying Valentine's cards for Postman and Delivery Driver
Spinster Felicity Dowager from Chutney on the Fritz is buying Valentine's cards for her postman and delivery driver. Felicity said: 'I am 24, and have never been married, and I am always being told by unhelpful maiden aunts that my best years are…
Read full storyStefano M. Stefano's Somewhat Inaccurate Movie Reviews
Here's a bunch of movies you'll want to check out after you read my somewhat inaccurate reviews. "Star Trek - The Motion Picture" - A bald chick flies the rocketship Enterprise straight into a galaxy gravity pull and needs the crew to fix her rea…
Read full storyMarjorie Taylor Greene Wants To Ban Black History Month
WASHINGTON, D.C. – (Satire News) – The woman who most of America is now calling the most hateful, despicable, evil woman in the entire universe, has just gone and stuck her size 13-D foot in her nasty, bigoted mouth. Marjorie “The Human Scarecrow”…
Read full storySpecial Forces From Switzerland Capture The World’s Most Notorious Terrorist Leader
CAMEL SHIT, Afghanistan – (Satire News) – Al-Zit Mohammed, supreme leader of the Taliban, and the most notorious terrorist leader on earth, has been captured. Afghanistan’s Mirage News Agency has confirmed that the 52-year-old beer-bellied leader…
Read full storyManchester United Captain Harry Maguire Says He Wishes He Had A Tenner For Every Spoof Written About Him
The Manchester United and England defender, Harry Maguire, has spoken out about the considerable, and growing, number of fake news stories written about him, and remarked that he wished he had a ten-pound note for every one of them, for then, he woul…
Read full storyJustice For The Capitol Building
The Capitol Building was vandalized by a mob of insurrectionists guided and motivated by Donald J. Trump. He claimed his reelection was stolen. Boo Hoo! Every loser’s lament. Trump failed to win the popular vote, and didn't come near winning t…
Read full storyWhat Will Rogers Might Say About Today's Events
Here are some idiosyncratic observations about life in America today, written in the style of Will Rogers, as thoughts from far outside the box. The Pope says all dogs go to heaven. Does that include Rottweilers? A rising tide lifts all boats…
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