Trump: Kill The Kill Switch
Donald Trump's campaign managers insist that there be no surprise kill-switch at the next presidential debate. No way should the networks have the right to snuff off one of Trump’s five-minute diatribe’s on the evils of Joe Biden and his son, both of…
Read full storyJustin Bieber’s Popularity Skyrockets Since His Appearance on Saturday Night Live
NEW YORK CITY – (Satire News) – Fox News is reporting that, since appearing on "Saturday Night Live", Justin Bieber's popularity has tripled. The Canadian singer’s record sales surpassed Nicki Minaj’s, Lady Gaga’s, and even the Trumpapalooza Ass K…
Read full storyTen Other Things Undecided Voters Are Undecided On.
Ten Other Things Undecided Voters Are Undecided On. 1) Eating a Filet Mignon prepared by Ina Garten, or eating bodega Spam that expired in 1997. 2) Getting passed a basketball in a game of hot potato, or getting passed an MK3 grenade. 3) Whe…
Read full storyDonald Trump Fears Debate Kill-Switch
Since Donald Trump kept interrupting Joe Biden during the first debate, the Debate Commissions decided the solution was to introduce a kill-switch for Trump’s microphone, a loud buzzer when he told a lie, but a heavenly bell-tone when either Trump or…
Read full storyDonald Trump To Star In Christmas Pantomime
There was great excitement amongst amateur thespians this morning when it was revealed that outgoing president, Donald Trump, has been asked to take the leading part in a major Broadway pantomime production for the New York festive season, and beyond…
Read full storySuicidal Nutter jumps off Beachy Head and survives!
Ageing Jo Johnson, a 69-year-old pensioner from Erith, Kent, was so pissed off with Covid, Brexit, Manchester United losing, and Jose Mourinho's constant whingeing, he decided enough was enough. Last Sunday evening, he left his humble abode, a 4…
Read full storyLara Trump Has Just Become The Meanest, Cruelest, Most Hateful Bitch in the Entire USA
NEW YORK CITY – (Satire News) – Just when millions of people thought that no one could ever be meaner, nastier, and have more hate in their heart than Donald Trump, along comes his fake, blonde-haired daughter-in-law from Hell, Lara Trump. The 38-…
Read full storyPele Invites Cristiano Ronaldo To Self-Quarantine in His $14.7 Million Brazilian Mansion
SAO PAULO, Brazil – (Sports Satire) – One of the world’s most famous soccer players, Pele, recently spoke with Cristiano Ronaldo who plays with Juventus. Sports Balls Illustrated Magazine reports that Pele, who is the president of the Sao Paulo R…
Read full storySan Antonio Spurs Assistant Coach Becky Hammon is Being Courted For an NBA Head Coaching Job
NEW ORLEANS – (Sports Satire) – According to ESPN-4, the word out of the Big Easy is that the New Orleans Pelicans are considering Spurs assistant coach Becky Harmon for the head coach job. Pelicans owner Gayle Benson, stated that she has checked…
Read full storyKirstie Alley is Catching Hell For Saying That She’s Voting For Donald Trump
LA BREA, California – (Satire News) – Former "Cheers" star Kirstie Alley has infuriated the Hollywood celebrity community by bragging that she is going to vote for President Trump. The 69-year-old overweight ex-actress said that she likes the Pres…
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