Famous singer now offended by Pancake Day
A famed singer and plagiarist, who has at least two big hits he has been sued for, has now said that he is offended by Pancake Day. 'It was bad enough, last week, when I said that I was offended by Valentine's Day, but now Pancake Day is here. The...
Read full storyPresident Trump Visits India and Immediately Insults The Entire Country By Saying He Wants a Big Mac Burger
NEW DELHI, India – President Trump landed at the Ravi Shankar International Airport and was greeted by a crowd estimated to be about 95 or maybe 98, including two dozen or so airport workers. It was very windy as the president waved to the crowd m...
Read full storySenate Votes to Not Allow Ballots in Presidential Election
Professing a commitment to avoiding mob rule, the Republican-led United States Senate voted to prohibit the introduction of voting ballots into the 2020 general presidential election. "We've already got a president, so there's no point in consider...
Read full storyBernie Sanders gives rivals finger-lickin’ good, crispy thrashing in Nevada as he aims his poultry gun on the White House
Rivals for the Democratic Party presidential candicacy in the state of Nevada were sent reeling, as He-Man of the Left Bernie Sanders delivered a mighty good kicking in their primaries. Skeletor Joe Biden screamed in pain despite coming second, as...
Read full storyTrump Plans To Completely Destroy News Outlets Like CNN, MSNBC, ABC, CBS, And NBC
MT. AIRY, Maryland – The president was in the town of Mt. Airy on a campaign tour. He was speaking before 196 supporters and 13 non-supporters. He told the crowd that he is making two lists and checking them both twice. He said that the first list...
Read full storyPresident Trump Shows His BFF Sean Hannity Personal Intimate Photos of Melania and the First Lady Explodes!
NEW YORK CITY – President #45 was in the “Big Apple” for an appearance on the Sean Hannity Show. Potus had lunch with the Fox News host at a local McDonalds. Sean had a Filet-O-Fish Sandwich, and the man that Elizabeth “Sacajawea” Warren calls “C...
Read full storyMeghan Markle and Prince Harry Say They Will Defy Queen Elizabeth And Continue To Use The Word “Royal”
SAUSALITO, California – Prince Harry and his lovely wife, the Duchess of Sussex, were visiting friends in Northern California, when they were asked about Queen Elizabeth’s latest royal antics. RumorLand News reporter Ty Quickmeister informed the v...
Read full storyElon Musk Creates Time Machine, Sends Tesla Cybertruck Into The Past
When Elon Musk announced his plans to create a time machine back in April of 2016, many in the scientific community were skeptical of the entrepreneur’s ability to take on such a formidable task. Despite the reservations, many in attendance at the pr...
Read full storyPutin to arrive in New York; will take over US
Thanks to the alert reporting of MSNBC, we now know the Russian plan is not simply to interfere with US elections. It wants to completely take over the country—next week. Mr. Putin has said he will probably reside in Trump Tower in New York, an...
Read full storyPancake Day Latest: Manchester United Captain Harry Maguire Is Going Round To His Mum's House Later
Harry Maguire, the Manchester United and England central defender who cost United £80million when he joined them last summer, has confirmed he will be going round to his mum's house on Tuesday, for a special Pancake Day treat. According to Maguire...
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