President Obama Stresses That The Russian All-Girl Punk Rock Band Pussy Riot Will Not Be Allowed To Perform In The USA
WASHINGTON, D.C. - The president addressed the members of the White House Press Corps concerning a matter that had been brought to his attention by Ann Coulter of all people. The GOP maven asked the president if he was going to allow Pussy Riot to...
Read full storyThe Hulk Comes Out as Gay
The Incredible Hulk abruptly came out as gay leaving a sudden, gaping hole in the GOP's anti-gay agenda. "Hulk SMASH closet!" said the huge, green monster, sporting a smug grin and semi-erection as he crashed to the ground with a "THOOMP!!" and broke…
Read full storyChurch should not dismiss gay marriage, says Pope Frankie the Argie, especially mine
Rome - A tongue-in-cheek remark has landed Pope Francis in a fine mess after outing himself in a gay marriage slip. "Someone is gay," Pope Frankie said enigmatically. "But he search for My Sweet Lord and has good willy...So who am I to fudge -...
Read full storyChurch ceiling ruined by sandals
The ceiling of St. Slippersarus Church in Gateshead is in need of repair after sandals ruined the décor. Apparently, youngsters had been observed taking off their sandals and hurling them upwards to shouts of 'Hallelujah!'. "It's a scandal,"...
Read full storyNick Clegg mobbed by screaming girls at Liberal Democrats conference
Liberal democrat-fever has hit sky-high records in the town of York this past weekend where the spring Liberal Democrat conference is taking place. The party arrived by coach where screaming and adoring fans were waiting holding banners and begging f...
Read full storySenate Slumber Party Disrupted by Obnoxious Junior Senators
Washington D.C.-A United States Senate slumber party was disrupted and nearly canceled altogether when what started out as a pleasant evening, filled with erstwhile discussions and fun-filled moments, quickly turned sour, thanks to the obnoxious beha...
Read full storyUS intelligence scours Putin body language plus items (found) in Moscow hotel laundry for next moves in Ukraine
Inside reports from the Pentagon indicate new methodologies of intelligence gathering are underway in the crisis with Russia's President Putin. The essential conflict is over whether Mr. Putin's vision to protect Ukraine and Russia's interest shou...
Read full storyArgentine President Cristina de Kirchner likens Crimea situation to the Falklands
Buenos Aires - Daft Argie wackjob Cristina de Kirchner has come out on Vladimir Putin's side by backing the 'return' of the Crimean Peninsula to the Russians. In a televised address this morning President Kirchner showed just how much recent brain...
Read full storyFacebook to change the default profile picture
Following on from Facebook allowing users of the popular social networking site to indicate a gender other than the rigidly binary Male and Female, the default profile picture will now be changed. "Not all our users want to put a profile picture,"...
Read full storyRossetti's famous 'Pandora' painting a dead ringer for Rebekah Brooks
Geneva, Switzerland - The pre-Raphaelite master's portrayal of Pandora opening her little box of evil has lain in a fusty Swiss bank vault since 1969 after spooking its superstitious Nooz of da Scrooz-reading owners with its baleful, knowing stare.
Read full storyWoman Stung By Bees Vows Revenge
A California woman stung more than 1,000 times by a swarm of bees is expected to be okay, but has vowed revenge on the bees that stung her. "Apparently," said a close friend of the woman "these bees swarmed towards her, and, taking advantage of he...
Read full storyScamatology is Having a Huge Garage Sale
Clearwater, FL Insisting they are not going out of business, Scamatology's diminutive leader Davey Makemerich announced that they would have a garage sale on the lawn of the Super Power building. With rumors that all is not well in the Scamatology...
Read full storyMy neighbour's orgasm broke my conservatory roof
A woman from Grimsby has a whole street to herself after ALL of her neighbours moved out because of her noisy lovemaking. Lucy Cox 34, says she has a "normal, healthy sex life" but it would seem the former residents of Enderweigh Close would strongly...
Read full storyRussian Roulette
Tsar of Russia, Peter the Great, 1672-1725 (aged 52) is said to have issued a Will of which the following is an excerpt: "… Russia must plunge Persia and Turkey into frequent wars; establish shipyards on the Black Sea… as well as the Baltic, as both are indispensable to a successful carrying out of our enterprises. We must hasten the downfall of Persia {many thanks to Jimmy Carter acting on behalf...
Read full storyWoody Allen: The Rumors Are Not True - I Am Not The Father of Kim Kardashian's Baby
NEW YORK CITY - Writer and director Woody Allen has told The Right Coast Revue that he is starting to feel like a combination of Arnold Schwarzenegger and Senator John Edwards who both fathered children with other women while they were married. Th...
Read full storyKid Rock Says That Spike Lee Needs To Shut His Bigoted Mouth Before He Shuts It For Him
NEW ORLEANS - Spike Lee recently commented in an article in Afro Sheen Magazine that white singers have no right singing rap music or hip hop music since it was a genre of music invented by blacks to be sung by blacks only. The well-known film dir...
Read full storyJennifer Lawrence Falls At A Fast Food Restaurant
BEVERLY HILLS - It appears that Jennifer Lawrence is becoming more famous for her slips, trips, and falls than for her acting. "Trippy" Lawrence, as Michelle Obama has nicknamed her, is noted for having tripped at last year's Academy Award Show wh...
Read full storyAshton Kutcher and Girlfriend Mila Kunis Are Asked To Cut Back On Their PDAs
WEST HOLLYWOOD - Ashton Kutcher, 36, and his fiancée Mila Kunis, 30, were having a nice quiet dinner at The Barbed Wire Barbecue Diner in West Hollywood. The two were celebrating the fact that they just both feel 110 percent better now that the ev...
Read full storyPutin Invades Coney Island To Help Russians Living There
Russian President Vladimir Putin has sent Russian troops into Coney Island, a part of Brighton Beach New York, that has a large immigrant Russian population. Swarming ashore from submarines that covertly approached the beach they quickly took over al…
Read full storyThe Russian Warship RS Siberia Has Left Cuba
WASHINGTON, D.C. - Vice-President Joe Biden has informed the White House Press that the Russian warship the RS Siberia has just left Havana Harbor and is sailing back to Russia. According to the Russian national news agency Vodkavich, the RS Siber...
Read full storySarah Palin Fires Back At Cindy McCain Saying She's The Biggest 'Sissy Girl' She's Ever Seen
WASILLA, Alaska - GOPicky Magazine has reported that there is no one who loves to hear themselves talk or hog the spotlight more than Sarah "Snowflake" Palin, with the one possible exception of Donald "The Hairdo From Hell" Trump. Tabitha Tula Wis...
Read full storyAn Angry Feminist Lesbian Looks at the Sunday Funnies
Today we welcome what we are told will be a lighthearted and insightful column by our usual feminist commentator, Val-Grace MacDorkin. Take it away, Val! Many Lesbian Feminists miss out on opportunities to connect with the general public by overlooking popular culture. I will never do this, I love popular culture, so long as it involves no males. Today I am looking at the Sunday Funnies, or Co...
Read full storyBoobs: they're not just for women anymore
Manboobs: are they appealing or appalling? Several celebrities consider them to be...well, both. That is, they think their own are just lovely, but they find other male celebrities hooters loathsome. Steven Tyler, who looks more and more like an old lady every day, has sprouted some B cups that joggle when he jogs (something he doesn't do nearly enough, judging by the state of his mammari...
Read full storyBighorns an endangered species, scientists say
Albuquerque, NM - New Mexico's bighorn sheep will be outfitted with chic new collars, complete with miniature radio receivers in a desperate attempt to keep the endangered animals from becoming extinct. An "army" of scientific researchers, equipped w...
Read full story"The Tonight Show": a lost episode?
HOLLYWEIRD, CA - Had Ed McMahon lived long enough to see the sex tape of his famous boss, Johnny Carson, that's reportedly being offered, privately, for sale to the highest bidder, McMahon might have amended his famous introduction of the Tonight Sho...
Read full storyTaylor Swift Urges Katy Perry To Write A Song About That Low-Life, Heartbreaking John Mayer
NASHVILLE - Taylor Swift, Jennifer Love-Hewitt, Jennifer Aniston, Ke$ha, Jessica Simpson, and Katy Perry all have one thing in common. They were all wined and dined and then unceremoniously dumped by the biggest jerk wad in Tinsel Town, John "The Pla...
Read full storyBook Review - The Hunchback of Notre-Dame by Victor Hugo
A sad tale about a bent over college football star determined to play for the "Fighting Irish' who sadly never makes it out of Paris. Hideously deformed and mocked by other footballers who laughed at his affliction. I hate people like that. So what, he was retarded, no need to keep mentioning it. It was poignant to hear him shout "The balls, the balls" when yearning to just grab a footba...
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