Rossetti's famous 'Pandora' painting a dead ringer for Rebekah Brooks

Funny story written by queen mudder

Monday, 10 March 2014

image for Rossetti's famous 'Pandora' painting a dead ringer for Rebekah Brooks
Wanna see pics of a naked Andy Coulson painted by Reuben's circa 1685?

Geneva, Switzerland - The pre-Raphaelite master's portrayal of Pandora opening her little box of evil has lain in a fusty Swiss bank vault since 1969 after spooking its superstitious Nooz of da Scrooz-reading owners with its baleful, knowing stare.

Rossetti rushed out the picture in three days flat during a laudanum-fueled weekend when a narcotic vision of a toxic redhead suddenly popped into the oil painting region of his brain.

It's one of a series of Pandora's Box paintings executed by the artist during his famous curly redhead phase which art hystery and jurisprudence specialists have both dubbed 'spookily prescient' given the Rebekah Brooks hacking trial.

Next month it will be auctioned for an estimated $11millon with dozens of online bids already scrambling to exceed the estimate.

Commenting on the pre-sale bidding war a spokesperson for ex-NewsCorpse owner Rupert Murdoch denied the octogenarian is among the bidders:

"Rupert's already got five just like it," a PR source said today.

"Wanna see pics of a naked Andy Coulson painted by Reubens circa 1695?"

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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