Catholic Church Introduces "Virtual Confession" for Computer Age
Tired and have no time to stop by the local church? Have not been able to see your priest to confess your sins due to the workload? Unable to pay your last respects to the dearly departed neighbor or childhood friend? No problem! The Catholic C...
Read full storyChuckle Brothers To Take Over Running Of British Government
Plans are being put in place for a dissolution of the Labour-led British government, and the formation of an emergency committee to run the country led by TV funnymen, the Chuckle Brothers. Barry and Paul Elliot, of Rotherham, are two comedians be...
Read full storySarah Palin's Personal E-Mail Revealed By An Unknown Hacker!
A successful hacker got into Sarah Palin's personal e-mail and now her private stuff is all over the Net. To Todd Palin, the possible '2nd Man,' this was the lowest blow he could imagine. To read an in-depth interview with Todd Palin, see the Mag...
Read full storyGordon Brown To Step Down In November
After months of speculation about his future, and pressure from those around him, Gordon Brown announced that he is to step down at the end of November. The Tesco shelf-stacker has been a part of the night-time team at the Chippenham store for mor...
Read full storyArriba trains beat world train 100% punctuality record
Arriba South East inter-city trains have flown in the face of rail privatisation problems to record a year of unbelievable time-keeping set to land them in the Guinness Book of Train Records. Their trains between London and Portsmouth, stopping at...
Read full storyDamien Hirst To Hold Jumble Sale
Damien Hirst, the Turner Award winner and talented 'artist', is to follow up a recent Sotheby's auction of his best and most sought-after prize artworks, by getting rid of the rest of his shite in a Jumble Sale. The 223-item lot raised over £111mi...
Read full storyDear Uncle Arthur
Dear Uncle Arthur, Please help me. I do not know what to do! The other day I went to my local library to search for information in support of our local campaign against GM crops. When I arrived I was shocked to see my husband kissing an attractive young librarian in the back office. When I confronted him when he admitted that he had been having an affair with her for six months since he...
Read full storyOtis "toff" Ferry In Street Brawl With Gary "paedo" Glitter
Gentleman thug Otis "tofty" Ferry floored Gary "vile disgraced, desperate, dung-eating, disease-ridden, pop-pervert" Glitter in a "bizzare" and "arousing" media demon street brawl. Eye-witnesses were shocked to see "fox-fondling" Otis g...
Read full storyEuropean & Al Queda Polls Favour Obama as Next US President: Both Seek a "Weaker" United States
(Strasbourg) Recent polls conducted in several European capital cities and across the Middle East have indicated both Europeans and Al Queda supporters alike would prefer Barack Obama to John McCain as the next US President. While these polls indicat...
Read full storyLindsay Lohan Engaged
RANCHO CUCAMONGA, CALIFORNIA - Sources close to Samantha Ronson, 31, have stated that she and actress Lindsay Lohan, 22, are planning on getting married in the not-too-distant future. A free-lance reporter asked Samantha who of the two would be a...
Read full storyMcCain unveils "Computer for the Aged"
Blackberry inventor and Republican presidential nominee John McCain today unveiled his latest invention today. Dubbed the "McCain Atomic Typographer," the device has a set of "keys" that, when pressed, causes characters to be printed on a medium, us...
Read full storyAfter Sarah Palin Yahoo Hack, McCain's Gmail A "Snoozer"
(Washington, D.C.) What if they hacked into your e-mail and no one noticed? That's exactly what happened after the hacker group Anonymous broke into Republican Vice Presidential candidate Sarah Palin's Yahoo account. They also broke into Republican P...
Read full storyUganda Bans Miniskirts, National Geographic Cheers Return to Normalcy
The Government of the African nation of Uganda has banned the wearing in public of the miniskirt by women (men are still permitted to wear them, but that is another story). They claim that this was done to prevent traffic accidents, both car and ox...
Read full storyTina Fey and Sarah Palin Are Indeed Sisters
SANDPOINT, IDAHO - Well it is official. As so many thousands of people suspected, Tina Fey, 38, and Sarah Palin, 44, are in fact sisters. Although they are not twins, as some felt, they are sisters none-the-less. An inside source very close to Am...
Read full storyObama Economic Policy: Cook the Books, Blame Republicans!
Washington,DC/TheSpoof.com - Presidential candidate Barack Obama displayed his superb culinary capabilities with his deft new recipe to explain the Double Fannie /Freddie Cheese Melt...And it's a WHOPPER! Joined by Democratic financial Hi-Rollers...
Read full storyUFO reports go up around Party Season
Mr Lawrence, a simple man of simple minds has devoted his life to proving that sightings of UFO's go up when more people have been drinking. The 40 year old told us: 'I have it on good authority from Xenon, my Alien buddy that more people see UFO...
Read full storyGerald Ratner poised to swoop on Goldman Sachs
Canary Wharf - (Northern Crock Mess): Former trailer-trash jewelery retailer Gerald Ratner is poised to swoop on investment giants Goldman Sachs after the bank's share price nosedived. Ratner, 69, famously caused the bankruptcy of his own eponymou...
Read full storyMiddle East Piss Process: Tipsy Livni/Sarah Palin to Nuke Iran
Tel Aviv - (General Pinochet Mess): An ex-Mossad half-sister of Russian Prime Monster Vlad 'the Impaler' Putin has been chosen to lead Israel out of its pacifist ideological desert and stand shoulder to shoulder with future US President Sarah Palin "...
Read full story'Theft, embezzlement, sub-standard service, greed, infidelity, prostitution, homosexuality, sectarianism AND miniskirts:' Uganda minister's rant
Kampala, Uganda - (Wobbly Ass Mess): Uganda's ethics and integrity (sic) minister has had a Damascene revelation about what makes his country sic (sic). In a televised press conference today Nsaba Buturo said the seven deadly sins of biblical lore...
Read full storyCERN scientists arrested for obscenity
NewsDesk Geneva, Switzerland: A group of young scientists from CERN were arrested last night while partying at a popular nightspot for scientists in Geneva. Reports coming in state young revellers in the Quantum Pub were arrested while stripping...
Read full storySarah Palin Email Hacked By Spoof Writer Warren Redlich
Sarah Palin, the Republican VP candidate, has been the victim of hackers who have infiltrated her Yahoo email account and obtained private information about the Alaska Governor. A group calling itself Anonymous has claimed responsibility. One...
Read full storyAmir Khan To Fight Man With No Fists
Amir Khan, the British fighter who was knocked out within the blink of an eye in his last bout, is keen to protect his fragile reputation from further damage in his next one, and is to face a boxer with no fists. Khan was pulverised by Breidis Pre...
Read full storyBritish Misprint Society claim Gary Glitter is a pedant
The British Misprint Society, which is sponsored by the Grauniad Newspaper, has today labelled failed glam rock star Gary Glitter a pedant. In a statement issued by its director of communications, Professor Brian Brain, he explains the dismay of t...
Read full storyLondon Black Cabs Fires Are Start Of 'The Rise Of The Machines'
London's famous Black Cabs are deliberately setting themselves on fire and taking copycat action in, what the capital's top policeman Sir Ian Blair is calling, Taximeter 3: The Rise Of The Machines. Commissioner Blair, that one who is in racism t...
Read full storyFed takeover of AIG ensures U.S. taxpayers are now self-insured. So watch yourself!
Washington, DC - Try avoiding a car accident or having to file a homeowners insurance claim. Or any claim altogether for that matter, even at all personal cost to yourself or especially that of your family. As now, after the Fed takeover of AIG (the...
Read full storyObama Runs Old Bat McCain Ad!
The campaigns have tussled over race cards, gender baiting and ageism through the election season. Demo-rats 4 Obama have introduced a new set of teeth marks into the competition with their independent ad about a cartoon character named Old Bat McCa...
Read full storyImmigration Controversy In UK over Pickles!
Five Gherkin pickles managed to make their way into the infamously bland cuisine of the United Kingdom. Smuggled from Nepal, the spicy cukes are in the midst of a battle for their residency in the UK. British immigration lawyer for the Vinegar Fi...
Read full storyOff-Shore Drilling Is Coming
According to the association of American Dentists, off-shore drilling will begin in late November of this year. A group of three Pensacola dentists, headed by Dr. Tyrell F. Gumbocker said that they have leased a 200-ft yacht, "The Dental Floss Qu...
Read full storyPalin Awarded the Rubber Dildo Award
Arizona Center for Biological Diversity awards the Rubber Dildo award every year to the pubic figure that has spent the most effort fucking themselves up at the expense of the common good. George Worst President ever Bush has won the prize seven year...
Read full storyBush Economy Sucks Like Hoover!
Just when we all believed that all the damage possible had been done and Worst President Ever would just slink off into the brush and go away, he shocked and awed us again! This time with a real live stock market crash and a 1920's style depression.
Read full storyHBO's and Hobos Merge in Brave New World Depression!
HBO's, Britain's largest mortgage lender appeared to be at the end of her rope as US economy tanked once again. As the American government has become the Union of Socialist States in Receivership, Britain's big, big bank looked like a goner, that is...
Read full storyPickleweasels to Replace Bearskin Hats for Palace Guards
LONDON - Military chiefs have come to terms with animal rights group regarding alternatives to the traditional bearskin hats famously worn by sentries at Buckingham Palace which take the skin of one whole Canadian black bear to make. Baroness Ann...
Read full story