Tel Aviv - (General Pinochet Mess): An ex-Mossad half-sister of Russian Prime Monster Vlad 'the Impaler' Putin has been chosen to lead Israel out of its pacifist ideological desert and stand shoulder to shoulder with future US President Sarah Palin "just in case Iran needs nuking."
Tipsy Livni, 69, was formerly on secondment to the CIA as a topnotch Niger yellowcake uranium expert during the initial 9/11 cover-up phase of 2001/2002.
Her other career-best achievement was to wind up Dick Cheney and Scooter Libby to such fever pitch that her own CIA counterpart Valerie Plame was outed as an Agency stooge.
Livni's political profile is zero - much like GOP vice presidential wannabe Sarah Palin.
Washington AC/DC analysts think the women would make an ideal Middle East Piss Process dream ticket.
"Let's face it,' LA FagHagSlagMag's political editor Dave Skank said today, "neither John McCain nor his Israeli soul-mate Ehud Olmert has the balls to press the button that will obliterate Iran."