Fat 19 year old's album makes UK No #1
London - (Large Ass Mess): A new Amy Winehouse she ain't. For a start Winehouse could fit three times over into Adele Adkins' since 20+ comfort-stretch jeans. In fact her entire body could squeeze into just one leg of Adkins' Country...
Read full storyCampaign Acknowledges Improper Videotaping
Hot on the heels of the New England Patriots' scandal involving the possible videotaping of their opponent's practices and signals, a similar videotaping incident has now come to light in the political arena.
Read full storyHayden Pregnant: is Milo the father?
The rumors are true: Hayden Panettiere and Milo Ventimiglia are moving in together. Sources have said that Hayden is only moving in with her older boyfriend to cover up the fact that she is already pregnant, and Milo may not be the father.
Read full storyHannah Montana song originally planned to be beamed into space as Valentine's Day gift to NASA daughters; jealous moms' demanded Beatles instead
Kennedy Space Center, Florida - News of a small but significant behind the scenes brouhaha over top NASA officials' decision to broadcast a Beatles song into space has not yet reached the mainstream media. It is the latest in the ages long strugg...
Read full storyVanessa asked to get "knocked up"
Vanessa Hudgens was shocked when a casting member on the High School Musical movie asked her to get "knocked up" for the filming of HSM3. "This just came as a total shock to me," Vanessa admits to Teen Fling Magazine. "I mean the movies are suppos...
Read full storyHeated Auto Seats Contribute to Rise in Deadly Anal & Urinal Infections
ALBANY - The National Institute of Research on Auto-Immune Diseases released a report today citing heated seats in automobiles as the likely reason for the recent rash of urinary tract (UTI's) and anal/rectal infections (ARI's).
Read full storySuperbowl Fever Kills Three
New York - Tragedy struck Midtown Manhattan Friday night when three patrons of Scruffy Duffy's Sports Bar were overcome with Superbowl fever and died; their lifeless bodies discovered in a heap near the dartboards.
Read full storyThousands of Illegal Immigrants Arrested while trying to Board the Dover to Calais Ferry
As the Police are unable to cope the British Army have been drafted in to Kent as Thousands of Illegal Immigrants who are desperate to leave the UK are attempting to board the Dover to Calais Ferry or sneak onto Lorries travelling th...
Read full storyK-Fed: Britney needs maximum security psych facility
Los Angeles - (Psychotic Mess): Delusional entertainer Britney Sears needs to be moved to a top security psychiatric facility Kevin Federline said today after negotiating a hefty increase in child support payments from his ex-wife's father's...
Read full storyParis Hilton asks: Has anyone seen Mike Hunt?
Socialite and elephant-lover Paris Hilton has added her celebrity presence to a high profile Internet campaign to locate a missing New Jersey man.
Read full storyCrack appears in Superbowl
Feenix Arizona - Sources close to Hilary Clinton today said that the much touted University of Phoenix Stadium, with its retractable roof and field, has been found to have a huge crack in it's structure. Engineers who investigated used the latest...
Read full storyEngland rugby team in trouble for nearly beating Wales
The English rugby team has found itself in hot water with the government's watchdog for mediocrity. The Council for Underperformance in National Teams has launched an investigation into how the England XV nearly won at Twickenham yesterday.
Read full storyFlavio Briatore Denies Paternity Claims
Formula One team boss, Flavio Briatore, batted away recent suggestions in the media that he has a long lost son which he is thought to be reunited with.
Read full storyBush blind trust frontman sold $500 million SocGen shares before framing rogue trader
Paris, France - (Embezzlement Mess): A frontman appointed by George W Bush's blind trust portfolio bagman William Stamps Farish III sold over $500 million SocGen shares held in an escrow account 'for an unnamed beneficiary' just days befo...
Read full storyPortuguese police: Blair is on our case
Praia Da Iluzion - (Goddawful Mess): Portimao prosecutors have issued a statement saying Tony Blair has schmoozed them with offers of UN gravy-train judiciary sinecures, front-row seats for the Beijing Olympics, cut-price first-class Virgin Airlines...
Read full storyOil Scarcity in Saudi Arabia
SAUDI ARABIA - Geologists reported that oil reservoir of Saudi Arabia is growing in scarcity. Last week, geologists reported that Saudi's oil decreased by 25%, greatly damaging Saudi's oil trades. Just yesterday the scarcity...
Read full storyEngland Football Manager Fabio Capello Dramatically Resigns Before First Game
Frustrated English Football Manager Fabio Capello has dramatically quit his job before a ball is kicked in his first match against Switzerland due to the fact the he was unable to find eleven Englishmen who where playing in the entire Football League...
Read full storyPunxsutawney Phil predicts wet conditions
While Groundhog Day has evolved into a fun diversion for news-starved media on a typically blah February 1, the real significance of Punxsutawney Phil's yearly appearance in the limelight is for old men who depend on the fat rodent to tell them w...
Read full storyArsene Wenger in Hospital Suffering 'Total loss of Facial Expression'
Arsenal Football Club, one of the top clubs in Europe and only slightly less big than Newcastle Utd, are in disarray as manager Arsene Wenger is hospitalised for 'the total and complete loss of all facial expression'.
Read full storyBeckham's PR Team nominated for prestigious award
David Beckham's PR Team have today been nominated for the highly-coveted Search for Positive In Negative (SPIN) award after Beckham was left out of the England Squad.
Read full storySpice Girl tour cancelled after row about lesbian act
The much hyped Spice Girl tour has been cancelled after irreconcilable artistic differences within the group. According to sources close to the band, two of the girls had felt that their act was not sufficiently raunchy for today's highly sexed u...
Read full storyHillary gave Me a Hickey
In a new series for TheSpoof.com this reporter has searched high and low for former suitors, dates and "steadies" of the leading democratic Candidate, Senator Clinton.
Read full storyMcCain to Take the Campaign to Guantanamo!
Arizona Senator, John "POW" McCain has announced that he will be campaigning in US Prison camp Guantanamo Bay, Cuba.
Read full storyHarmonic Tremor
On Wednesday, 30 January 2008, a strong earthquake, 6.2, struck off the coast of East Timor, eastern end of the Indonesian archipelago, a former Portuguese colony.
Read full storySuper bowl to be televised on NEPTV
Media producers seeking the absolute best quality TV broadcast of this year's have awarded the exclusive transmission rights to NEPTV, the New England Patriots Network.
Read full storyPointer Finds New Huckster's Flip:I Heart and Have Hearted All Along: Huckabee
The very rev Mike "Huckster" Huckabee has reversed hisself on the "I Heart Huckabee" film. Republican candidate the Very Reverend Mike Huckabee, in a last ditch effort to salvage his failing campaign, claims to have been the inspi...
Read full storyThis day in business history: Sporting goods giant DING merges with Spal Balls Inc
Sporting good giant Ding Inc surprised the business world 58 years ago today by merging with little know Spal Balls Inc.
Read full storyHPV Carcinogen Masculinas!
Just as all but the abstinence only crowd has become aware of the danger of HPV-caused cervical cancer, a surprising development has arisen among males. Men have been shown to be developing HPV-generated cancer of the throat in numbers that rival the...
Read full storyTips for improving self-confidence
Self-confidence is so important in today's cut and thrust life, and you really need to stand out from the crowd if you want to get ahead in this world. There is no point sitting at home feeling sorry for yourself, so get up on your feet and do something about your sorry excuse for a life. Be aggresive! Be firm! Stand up straight when people are talking! What's wrong with you?! You need a s...
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