Battle of Britain Squadron to Reform
Enraged at the allegations made by historian, Dr Alan Cumming, a few of 'The Few' have decided to reform, some 67 years after the actual battle to prove his theories wrong.
Read full storyImmigrants Stealing British Workers Jobs
Home secretary Jacqui Smith faced embarrassing questions in the House yesterday after her claim that the majority of jobs created since Labour came to power in 1997 had been filled by home grown British Workers was disproved by figures released by th...
Read full storyBrown Applauds Saudi Leader's Jokes/Policies
Abdullah bin Abdul Aziz, the King Of Saudi Arabia, yesterday impressed British ministers, both with his politics and his inimitable humour. In conversation with MP's before the royal dinner Mr Aziz was questioned about the Saudi Arabian policies...
Read full storyBritney Spears is a bad Mom, says jealous bitch
Britney Spears barely talks to or plays with her two little kids - and treats them like fashion accessories, a child care 'expert' has found. Elaine Whey, 42 and fat, had this to say in her sworn court testi...
Read full storyFormer Bond Pierce Brosnan may Face Assault Charges
Smug b*stard Pierce Brosnan is being investigated for alegedly assaulting a photographer. LA County Sheriff Randy Allnite had this to say: "We are investigating a complaint made against smug b*stard Pierce B...
Read full storyHarry a threat to endangered species
London - (Orinthological Mess): Prince Harry is a right royal tosser and a threat to endangered species, Norfolk police said today.
Read full storyKucinich likens GOP's backing of Bush to Exxon Mobil's hiring of Exxon Valdez skipper
Philadelphia - (Excoriating Mess): The 2000 backing of George W Bush as the GOP's official Big Oil gunslinger has been likened by perennial Democatic presidential wannabe Dennis Kucinich to Exxon Mobil's hiring of Captain Joseph Hazlewood, th...
Read full storyCheerleader wins scholarship to University of Hard Knocks for team spirit for getting sacked by football team day after car crash
Seattle, Washington - Always wanting to be both on the sideline and on the field, Cali Kaltschmidt, a cheerleader at Washington State's Aubum High, was torn between just being a cheerleader boasting the team's spirits and wanting to actually...
Read full storyBBC DJ To Have Both Feet Amputated
Radio 2 early morning DJ is to have both feet amputated following serious gunshot wounds that the Director of the British Orthopaedic Foot & Ankle Society described as the "worst injury" he had ever seen.
Read full story'I told you I was right' says Mr Wrong
Mr Leonard Wrong, from Aberdeen in Scotlandshire told his wife of 39 years, 'I told you I was right' on his death bed.
Read full storyChristie's auction house livid at Lord Linley coke sex fiasco
London - (Depraved Mess): It's looking more like a farcical episode of Royal Trash in the Attic at London auctioneers Christies UK today as their chairman of less than one year, Lord Linley, emerges as the seedy 'minor royal' in...
Read full storyJust Kidding? 'Hurricane Katrina' Exposed as Scam
Hollywood (Selluloid Empire) - In what has come to be know as the greatest scam in the history of mankind, disgruntled anonymous film editors blew the whistle on local, state and federal officials and Tinseltown spintrepreneurs, expo...
Read full storyFraud Squad says Saudi king is Mossad plant
New Scotland Yard, London - (Assinine Mess): The head of the UK Serious & Disorganised Fraud Squad says the visiting King of Sordid Arabia is a Mossad plant whose DNA is closer to the notorious Romanov family hypnotist Rasputin than to the Bedu roots...
Read full storyParis Hilton Reported Missing
(Hollywood) - Peeple Magazine today announced it has filed a missing persons report with the Los Angeles Police Dept regarding the whereabouts of Paris Hilton. Ms. Hilton has mysteriously disappeared from the Hollywood scene and has not been seen by...
Read full storyRoomba Kill-Bots Kill 538 US Soldiers in Iraq
WASHINGTON (FMLiveWire) - Roomba executives are devastated to reveal that a squad of their new Warrior killer robots accidentally massacred 538 American soldiers just after the robots were deployed in Iraq.
Read full storyAlan Greenspan Admits USA May Be Near Bankrupcy
In a manner reminiscent of Dickens "A Christmas Carol" Alan Greenspan after a visit last night by the ghost of Ayn Rand, has recanted all his pomp's and works as former Chairman of the Federal Reserve Board. In tears during the intervie...
Read full storyCanadian Guy Can Go to the Doctor Anytime
The Cincinnati customer service firm of House and Harris has been learning a lot about Canada recently through the efforts of IT specialist Ian McDougalman, who has come there for 3 weeks from their Kitchener, Ontario location.
Read full storyHeather Muck Mills Denies Holocaust Ever Happened
Sir Paul's nutcase wife Heather Mills launched into angry outbursts during TV interviews comparing herself to Eva Braun, Yoko Ono, Paris Hilton, Myra Hindley, Britney, Diana, Hitler and Posh Spice. But still, on balance, she'...
Read full storyRoyal Blood Sports Probe- Prince Harry Culls Dodo's On Sandringham Estate
Prince Harry and two friends are being questioned after a pair of Britain's rarest birds were culled on the Queen's Sandringham estate.
Read full storyStephen Fry Goes Missing (Again)
Stephen Fry, the 'jolly educated' host of TV panel quiz game QI, has gone missing again, fuelling speculation that, this time, he may be gone for good. Fry first went missing in 1995, when, appearing in the West End play Cell Mates, he 'got nervou...
Read full storyOver 60s Now More Sexually Active Than Ever
People in the over 60s age group are now more sexually active than their younger counterparts, according to a bloke in the pub.
Read full storyGeorge Bush Receives Electroshock, Anti-Psychotic Medications for WW III Comments
WASHINGTON (FMLiveWire) - George Bush has received an extensive series of electroshock treatments combined with anti-psychotic medications after his lunatic comments about starting World War III over Iran.
Read full storyRepublican Duncan Hunter withdraws from Presidential Race
After a late night in consultation with advisors to the Rudy Giuliani campaign, Duncan Hunter has announced he will withdraw from his bid for the office of President.
Read full storyRon Paul - Jay Leno to be VP candidate
Ron Paul appeared with Jay Leno on the Tonight Show tonight and the two stunned the audience. Paul, a Republican presidential candidate on the rise, got down on one knee and proposed to Leno, asking Leno to be his vice-presidential candidate.
Read full story"Beatles ReUnion Concert Still Possible!" says Paul McCartney
Liverpool - In Memphis each year the remaining members of Elvis's band, including back-up singers, get together and sing with an Elvis Hologram and video display.
Read full storyThe Dedication from the Book I haven't written yet
When I first entertained the idea of writing a book, two things immediately ran through my mind.
Read full storyMy Workout Log
6:00 AM - Awaken from a good night's sleep. I quickly put on my Nike Dri-fit pullover and my tights - the ones I run in, not the ones I wear when I patrol the city at night searching for evildoers.
Read full storyGloves are off in Calzaghe/Kessler war of words
The recent attempt by the Boxing authorities to make the sport more family friendly came to an abrupt end as Joe Calzaghe met Dane Mikkel Kessler for the first time here in Cardiff last night.
Read full storyJesuits to install glory holes in confessionals; not exactly "dick in the box"
Jesuit leaders responsible for over 350 North America archdioceses announced today that they were taking steps to make it easier for priests to reach out to their parishioners by installing glory holes in their congregation's confessionals.
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