Over 60s Now More Sexually Active Than Ever

Written by Mister Meaner

Wednesday, 31 October 2007


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Singing and shagging, it's all they do!

People in the over 60s age group are now more sexually active than their younger counterparts, according to a bloke in the pub.

More than 95% of those interviewed by the man confessed to having had an extramarital affair whilst they had been drawing their pensions, whilst nearly a third claimed to have taken part in a 'threesome'.

One woman, Ethel Floozy, of the Frozen North, said:

"I'm 78, but that doesn't stop me. I'm at it like a rabbit every night!"

Another, Gracie Arbuckle, 83, from Manchester, choked by cigarette smoke, said:

"I get all randy about six o'clock after me tea. I mention to me husband about making sure he 'doesn't leave the backdoor unlocked', and that's all he needs. That's unless it's a Sunday. We usually wait until after Songs of Praise."

Analysts claim that sex amongst the old and crippled can be a good thing, and can even prolong life.

Dr David Brufen of the Old Age Sex Institute near Birmingham, said:

"There's nothing wrong with it as long as grandad is careful once grandma hits the high notes."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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