Too much Iraqi TV violence blamed for Virginia Tech massacre
Blacksburg - (Rioters): President Bush has blamed too much gratuitious TV violence for today's student massacre at Virginia Tech where a lone gunman killed at least 32 students before committing suicide.
Read full storyBREAKING NEWS - Something happened, somewhere else!
In a shock news bulletin from a foreign news agency, something happened, somewhere else.
Read full storyChicago Cubs to get new Field
The Cubs have finalized a new deal, and their plans to get a new field for 2009 are now in place.
Read full storyPresident Bush to Appear on "Are You Smarter Than A Fifth Grader?"
Richard Nixon appeared on Laugh-In and said "sock it to me." Bill Clinton played the saxaphone for Johnny Carson. Now, George W. Bush has filmed an episode of "Are You Smarter Than A Fifth Grader?"...
Read full storySpongeBob NRA Partnership Ends In Tragic Shooting
(Provo--UT) "As Charlton Heston is my witness, I didn't think you could kill a cartoon character." That was the statement of disbelief uttered by NRA Executive Vice President, Wayne LaPierre, when he was informed that SpongeBob SquarePa...
Read full storyNCAA Gymnastics Finals Set
The NCAA men set the final teams in place for their gymnastics national championships for both individual and team competitions this week. As no one really cared that much, however, the event was not telecast on any major or minor television network...
Read full storyJeff Gordon Wins Texas NASCAR Race, Then Retires
Jeff Gordon won his second race at the Fort Worth area Texas Motor Speedway, then promptly retired from the sport after receiving his trophy.
Read full storyTheSpoof.com Writer 'Monkey Woods' Still Missing in Dudley
Our very own 5 star rated Monkey Woods is still missing in Dudley after being taken by circus folk whilst reporting for TheSpoof.com. It was 3 weeks ago that the TheSpoof.com first lost contact with Monkey and it is assumed that Ringo's Superstar...
Read full storyDon Imus Gets Job Offer From MC Hammer
Don Imus, the former radio shock jock who was fired for controversial remarks about the Rutgers University women's basketball team, has obtained a new job. The man most recently famous for talking about nappy headed hos will now write lyrics abo...
Read full storyProtestors torch Gere effigies after Shilpa Shetty snogging fiasco
Mumbai - (Ass Mess): Furious protestors set alight an effigy of Pretty Woman star Richard Gere after he snogged and groped Celebrity Big Racist winner Shilpa Shetty at an Aids awareness rally in New Delhi.
Read full story'Jew'-ropean Union Latest
Following announcements earlier this month that the proposed European Constitution would be rewritten, Jewish groups have been voicing their views for the way forward.
Read full storyAnna Nicole Smith Diaries For Sale On E-Bay
Two diaries written by Anna Nicole Smith will be auctioned off on E-Bay, with a reserve price set at $25,000 each. Both were listed for sale in a private auction, but none met the minimum price. The auction house felt that it was because all of the...
Read full storyAnn Coulter named new War Czarette. Vows to bring troops home immediately.
Washington, D.C. - The White House announced today that it is naming conservative pundit Ann Coulter to be the nation's first War Czarette. The fiery right-wing commentator and author has accepted the appointment, and responded to questions about...
Read full storyRichard Geres penis burnt by Indian!
Angry crowds in several Indian cities burned effigies of Richard Geres penis, a day after he swept up Celebrity Big Brother winner Shilpa Shetty in his arms and kissed her several times during an Aids-awareness event.
Read full storyThe Spoof warned in January "Comet McNaught portends royal disaster"
London - (Rioters): Prince William and Kate Middleton's break-up was foretold in January this year as satirical skywatchers advised of the ominous impact that Comet McNaught would have on the royal romance.
Read full storyAl Sharpton and Jesse Jackson Apologize to Duke
In a stunning turn of events, Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson have apologized to Duke University. In a written statement slipped under the door late night, it read:...
Read full storySigns and Portents: Cosmic Red Square entombs Death Star
Outer Space - (Cosmic Press): The Ministry of Space has confirmed the discovery of the near-perfect Red Square nebula in the Alpha and Omega quadrant at whose heart is a giant white death star named MWC 922.
Read full storyTony Blair attempts to get mental health law changed in time for next election.
Ministers face a fight to get mentally ill people through Parliament.
Read full storyMothman Found Running a McDonalds
After years of searching, scientific and paranormal researchers finally discovered what happened to the Mothman of Point Pleasant, WV.
Read full storyPrince William Hammered by Queen, Cocktails.
In an absolute shock to the country, and the world, Prince William has gotten drunk.
Read full storyBullet proof school ties to go on sale!
London, England, Rotters news. Due to the recent surge in gun and knife crime in and around schools, a UK firm is set to release a complete wardrobe of body armour, combat gear for use at school. Their first item off the production line is the bul...
Read full storyBritish Grand Prix News
There was an exciting two days of Grand Prix racing in Dudley this weekend, with competitors from all over the Black Country challenging for two world titles.
Read full storyKate: "It all boils down to orgasm"
London - (Unrequited Press): Her friends have always known what everyone else is only now realising: a multi-orgasmic woman has her needs.
Read full storyPrince William/Kate Middleton - Her Name Was "Too Short" Says Mail On Sunday
"She may have been a looker, but her name wasn't long enough."...
Read full storyAlien Found in Dick Cheney's Intestines
Early this morning, Dick Cheney was rushed to the hospital, having severe abdominal pains. Suspecting that he had swallowed another roll of hundred dollar bills, they quickly rushed him into emergency surgery. After determining that Vice Presiden...
Read full storyIran hostage sailors comfort William
Bovington Barracks - (Ass Mess): Prince William was being comforted in the bosom of the army last night as the barracks' camp commander brought in fourteen of the Iran hostage sailors to cheer him up following his break-up with wannabe somebody K...
Read full storyRev. Sharpton and Rev. Jackson Demand Ellen Degeneres' Job
Rev. Al Sharpton and Rev. Jessee Jackson were outraged at a comment made on air by Ellen Degeneres. They are now demanding that NBC network officials fire her over her racist remarks.
Read full storyBush Back On Booze
US President George Bush has started drinking heavily again. According to sources close to the White House, Mr Bush is knocking back up to three bottles of cheap sherry a day and has been seen in public parks in Washington, shouting at pigeons.
Read full storySuperheros to Die Soon
Work has already begun on the next Spiderman film in which the arachnid hero meets his maker.
Read full storyWilliam and Middleton Split Over Gingham Dress
Speculation continues into why Prince William and Kate Middleton have ended their Four year relationship. Sources close to the Palace have hinted that it may have been Prince William's insistence that he wears a gingham pinafore dress and sings a...
Read full storyCancer link with Catholic faith?
Dangerous Dioxin Levels Found in L.A. Communion Wafers...
Read full storyReligion was our best confidence trick yet admits Council
The United World Council of Religions issued a stunning announcement late last night. There had been rumours for some time that something newsworthy was about to be released but not as momentous as this.
Read full storyGarry Kasparov Arrested In Russian Chess Street Battle Revolution Thingy
Russian opposition leader Garry Kasparov was one of 170 people arrested in an anti-Kremlin rally in Moscow at the weekend.
Read full storyET McCrone Asks for Prince William's Hand
McCrone who has sought to reunite the PM with the USPrez has now made a bold move to become Queen of England! Liftevator operator in Liverpool, nyc and Tucson, AZ McCrone has run an off-beat campaign for what he call the PrezMinistership. He is obses...
Read full storyYu Dan, the CCP's "ears, eyes, throat and tongue"
Ya Dan, a female professor, narrate the story of Confucius, interpret the Analects of Confucius on CCTV-10. Yu Dan's work has attracted critics .But Yu Dan doesn't seem to worry too much about her critics, dismissing them by saying "It&#...
Read full storySharpton & Imus to Team on Sirius Talk Radio!
Our usually reliable sources indicate that Sirius CEO, Mel Karmazin, disgraced shock jock Don Imus, and world feared swell fella and intimate friend of Jesus, the most reverend Al Sharpton spent today in secret talks in Cockburn Town on the Turks and...
Read full storyTawad and Jihad Brigades Linked to the Bush Administration
(CMM) - The BBC said Sunday it is "deeply concerned" about an unknown militant group's claim that it has killed a BBC reporter who had been kidnapped last month in Gaza.
Read full storyHeroes and Villians Unite!
It is about damn time! Here we are labeling each other as victims, criminals, heroes, and villains based on track records, race, religion, and all of the BULL CRAP that is supposed to make the United States of America really stand up to it's title and do something decent for the citizens and immigrants. My name, as if Coporate America gives a rat's behind anyway, ain't even that import...
Read full storyRussians Take Lead from Bush
MOSCOW (Routers) - When activists gathered near the Kremlin in Moscow Saturday to protest President Vladimir Putin trampling on their democratic freedoms, the Russian authorities took the lead from the Bush Administration's handling of protestors...
Read full storyGeorge Will Jumps on the #42 Black Bandwagon!
A search of George Will articles in support of civil rights, integration and support for minorities held behind by prejudice yields a big goose egg! But that hasn't stopped the bespectacled conservative journalist from aligning himself and his ba...
Read full storyHarry Potter to be Killed off in Book Seven
The release of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows is on July 21, 2007. An employee from the book's publishers has leaked to the press that the book will end in a big disaster. The two characters the J. K Rowling wants to kill off are Harry Pott...
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