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Funny story: The Philadelphia Eagles Are Interested In Manchester United’s Harry Mcguire

The Philadelphia Eagles Are Interested In Manchester United’s Harry Mcguire

PHILADELPHIA – A spokesperson for the NFL Philadelphia Eagles has said that the team has expressed an interest in signing Harry Mcguire, the current captain of the Manchester United Red Devils to a lucrative contract. The Sports Mirror has learned...

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Funny story: President Trump Says That He Now Knows Who Brought The Coronavirus To The United States

President Trump Says That He Now Knows Who Brought The Coronavirus To The United States

WASHINGTON D.C. – President Trump says that he has finally found out how the Coronavirus got to the United States' shores. POTUS said that Rudy Giuliani spoke with a member of the Chinese Department of Food, and it appears that the virus was broug...

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Funny story: Joe and Jill Biden Are Already Picking Out The New Colors For The White House Carpets

Joe and Jill Biden Are Already Picking Out The New Colors For The White House Carpets

WASHINGTON, D.C. – Mr. and Mrs. Joe Biden celebrated his fantastic victory in the South Carolina Primary well into the wee hours. Reports are that the happy couple danced to the music of Led Zeppelin, The Eagles, and The Barenaked Ladies while di...

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Funny story: Elizabeth Warren Got Clobbered In The South Carolina Primary and Now Wonders Why Voters Just Don’t Like Her

Elizabeth Warren Got Clobbered In The South Carolina Primary and Now Wonders Why Voters Just Don’t Like Her

CHARLESTON, South Carolina – The woman that President Trump nicknamed “Pocahontas” got soundly beaten at the voting booths. Warren finished in 5th place with just 7% of the total vote. She sat in her motel room and wondered why so many of her supp...

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Funny story: President Trump Sarcastically Chimes In On The South Carolina Democratic Primary

President Trump Sarcastically Chimes In On The South Carolina Democratic Primary

WASHINGTON, D.C. – The president was asked by a reporter with RumorLand News for his opinion on the Democratic Primary. Trump grinned and said that he didn’t really see much of of it because he was watching reruns of “Gilligan’s Island.” He d...

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Funny story: Joe Biden Wins Big In A South Carolina Blowout!

Joe Biden Wins Big In A South Carolina Blowout!

COLUMBIA, South Carolina – Former Vice-President, Joe Biden, showed that there is still a lot of gas in his tank, as he scored a resounding victory in the South Carolina Democratic Primary, winning close to 50% of the vote. President Trump sent hi...

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Funny story: President Trump Defends The Houston Astros

President Trump Defends The Houston Astros

BRANDYWINE, Maryland – Republican, Donald Trump, was interviewed by Sports Balls Illustrated writer, Pistachio Custer, and was asked what he thought about the Houston Astros Sign-Stealing Scandal. POTUS put his Big Mac burger down, grinned like th...

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Funny story: Nik Wallenda Ready To Cross A Dangerous Lava-Spewing Volcano In Nicaragua

Nik Wallenda Ready To Cross A Dangerous Lava-Spewing Volcano In Nicaragua

SARASOTA, Florida – High-wire aerialist, Nik Wallenda, has been training to walk across an active volcano located a few miles outside of Managua, Nicaragua. The 41-year-old daredevil who is a 7th-generation member of he famed Flying Wallendas circ...

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Funny story: Some Points About The Coronavirus and Tax Refunds That Trump Is Telling His Republican Supporters

Some Points About The Coronavirus and Tax Refunds That Trump Is Telling His Republican Supporters

WILDWOOD, New Jersey – President Trump was speaking to a huge crowd of GOPers at The Benedict Arnold Middle School gymnasium in Wildwood, New Jersey. He threw out red MAGA caps to the crowd, and was shocked when he saw one of the caps get thrown...

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Funny story: Mike Bloomberg Compares His Billions To Trump’s Billions and The Result Will Shock You

Mike Bloomberg Compares His Billions To Trump’s Billions and The Result Will Shock You

TARBORO, South Carolina – Mike Bloomberg, the multi-billionaire who is picking up more Democratic support than Lizzy Warren, Joey Biden, and the Bernster Sanders put together, says that he is in “Full Kick-ass” mode. President Trump has said that...

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Funny story: Bernie Sanders Refuses Russia’s Amazingly Generous Campaign Offer

Bernie Sanders Refuses Russia’s Amazingly Generous Campaign Offer

LONG BRANCH, South Carolina – The candidate who is leading the Democratic pack running for president, Bernie Sanders, told The Washington Globe Express that he has just received a tremendously generous offer from President Vladimir Putin of Russia.

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Funny story: Melania Trump Reveals Why She Wants To Move Back To New York City

Melania Trump Reveals Why She Wants To Move Back To New York City

WASHINGTON, D.C. - Reports coming out of the White House are that first lady Melania Trump is not a very happy camper. An unnamed White House insider said that Melania has recently been looking at photographs of Trump Tower and she suddenly break...

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Funny story: Harvey Weinstein Requests To Be Put In The Same Prison Cell As Bill Cosby

Harvey Weinstein Requests To Be Put In The Same Prison Cell As Bill Cosby

NEW YORK CITY – Now that disgraced movie mogul, Harvey Weinstein, has been found guilty of sexual assault, he will be sentenced to prison. Weinstein spoke with a reporter for the New York Sun Observer, and said that he wants the judge to send him...

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Funny story: Meghan Markle Says That Her and Melania Trump Have Been Secretly Texting Each Other

Meghan Markle Says That Her and Melania Trump Have Been Secretly Texting Each Other

GALVESTON – Prince Harry and his gorgeous wife traveled to Galveston to visit the hotel/museum where famed pirate Jean Lafitte had spent a weekend back in the summer of 1799. Harry and Meghan are fans of the infamous Carribean buccaneers which inc...

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Funny story: An Ex-Hooters Girl Claims That President Trump Fathered Her Triplets

An Ex-Hooters Girl Claims That President Trump Fathered Her Triplets

CHICAGO – The Chicago Daily Wind is reporting that a woman has come forward alleging that the occupant of the White House, Donald J. Trump, is the father of her 13-year-old triplet daughters. Milly Wetwind, 34, who goes by the name of Milly Knocke...

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Funny story: Major League Baseball Reveals The Punishment The Houston Astros Will Be Receiving Due to Their Sign Stealing Scandal

Major League Baseball Reveals The Punishment The Houston Astros Will Be Receiving Due to Their Sign Stealing Scandal

NEW YORK CITY – The commissioner of Major League Baseball, Rob “The Man” Manfred, has just released his ruling on the Houston Astros Sign-Stealing Scandal. After much consideration, Manfred said that he will be implementing a three-part punishment...

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Funny story: Taylor Swift Surprises Her Millions of Voting Age Fans With An Amazing Political Offer Regarding Trump

Taylor Swift Surprises Her Millions of Voting Age Fans With An Amazing Political Offer Regarding Trump

MEMPHIS - One of the most popular singers on the music scene today is Taylor Swift. She has sold over 200 million singles and albums worldwide, including 3.2 million in Guatemala alone. Tay-Tay, as her 100 million-plus Twitter and Instagram follow...

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