The Gov. Cuomo Action Figure Doll is Flying Off the Shelves
NEW YORK CITY – The toy manufacturing company Toypaloosa is reporting that sales of the new Governor Andrew Cuomo Action Figure Doll are going through the roof. Governor Cuomo has become very popular of late because he conducts his daily C-19 pres...
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15 Year-Old French Girl Gets Book Published: Writers Commit Mass Suicide
New York -- Flavia Bujor, a 15 year old girl from Paris, France became a published author this past week, sparking a wave of mass-suicides among writers across the globe.
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New York Man Says There Are Two Things You Can Be Sure Of
A man in New York has spoken out about what he says are the two things in life that are so certain, that they are absolutely impossible to escape. Andrew Smith, of Long Island, was evaluating the drudgery, lack of freedom, and uncertainty of moder...
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No-talent kid says he is Bob Dylan's son
NEW YORK CITY -- A young man claiming to be the son of Bob Dylan has come forward to say that he cannot follow in his father's footsteps because he has no talent and doesn't care to have any.
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Hulk Porn Greeted With Bad Press
NEW YORK CITY-Comic book legend Stan Lee announced that the release of Marvel's new adult movie ‘Hulk In The Pants' will be delayed due to the string of bad press the unreleased movie has already received from critics.
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Tekashi69 COVID-19 Fundraiser Song Released!
(Brooklyn, New York) Rapper, social media influencer, urban poet, and Internet meme groundbreaker Tekashi69 wasted no time after his recent release from a Brooklyn jail (due to the threat of the COVID-19 pandemic) to release a new song meant to raise...
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New York City Mayor Mike Bloomberg's Latest Food Restriction Is Un-American
Song celebrates streets of San Francisco
Martians: Earth Day, Phooey! We Want a Mars Day!
Queens Man Singlehandedly Making America Old-School Again
After Brexit, Texas mulls "Texit"
Martha Stewart flees country with Michael Jackson
Hillary Clinton Develops An Interest In Sex
NBC's Newest Realty TV Show is "I Want to Impregnate a Hilton"
Ultra-rich Facing New Challenges Due to COVID-19
New York Woman Heartened by Effusive Praise from Tech Support Specialist
New York Governor Cuomo: 164 Sudden Covid Deaths, Bullet Holes Aside
Anthony Weiner Dejected and Depressed Says He May Just Say The Heck With It And Move To Africa
Crazed Clown Car Chase (National Alliteration Championships soon)
A crazed clown was spotted driving down a major New York highway in an exploding stunt car at noon today. The clown later revealed to be local legend, Stinko the Clown, put his floppy shoed foot to the pedal, which in turn was put to the metal in per...
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Munchkins from the Wizard of Oz Demand Recount of 1939 Oscar Race
"Gone With The Wind" won for Best Picture that year. Supposedly. But who knows, say the Munchkins. The recent error in the announcement of Best Picture in the 2017 race is the catalyst for the action of the little people, who have commented, "Hey, mi...
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Spiderman Quits Law Enforcement, Becomes Pizza Boy
Marvel Comics character and part-time superhero Spiderman announced his retirement today to a stunned New York City and a number of delighted criminal masterminds.
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Drones Don't Get Invited to City's New Year's Eve Bash
Outrage was in evidence among drones (y'know, those flying thingies that come in all sizes and shapes) when they learned they were not invited to the massive party thrown by the city of White Plains, north of New York City. More specifically, the d...
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De Blasio Pledges to Bring NYC Carriage Horses to White House if Elected
After failing to follow through on the promise he made on the day he took mayoral office in 2014, to eliminate New York City's cruel and archaic carriage horse industry, Mayor Bill de Blasio has vowed to bring every last NYC carriage horse with him t...
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Saddam Hussein Signs Underwear Deal with Calvin Klein
NEW YORK - Calvin Klein announced a three-year deal with Saddam Hussein in which the former Iraqi dictator would appear in a series of advertisements modeling fashionable underwear. "We want to show the world that every man can improve his image by w...
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Queens Man Admits to Being Non-Essential Worker
Notwithstanding the documentation partially exempting him from the COVID-19 lockdown and authorizing him to leave his house to travel to the grocery store where he has been employed for nearly two years, Harry White of Queens, New York, admitted to n...
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Drone Crashes Through Window, Lands in NY Apartment
Yikes! Are the aliens from outer space arriving? No, not yet, anyway. There's an interesting backstory here. A reporter from The Spoof, one skilled in talking and understanding "drone talk," has gotten the scoop from the nosy drone. Here's the skinny. Apparently the drone was flying near the apartment house when he noticed that one of the residents was watching the movie "Star Wars,"...
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Depressed Pigeon Misses Shitting on People
(New York, New York) Cher Ami, an ordinary New York City pigeon named after the famous British homing pigeon, is suffering from extreme depression and downright anger now that the city has entered its sixth week of lockdown. We caught up with Cher on...
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Dan Rather Joins Naked News Team
NEW YORK - CBS News anchorman Dan Rather will not go gently into that good night after his final broadcast. He will go naked instead. Rather, 73, announced this morning that he is joining the staff of Naked News, where he will serve as weatherman an...
Read full storyFunny New York Headlines
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Kozlowski takes up kick-boxing, gets ink in anticipation of prison sentence
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NY Times to Lay off All Reporters
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New York Nuns Not Happy About Car Getting Towed
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Some People Don't Hate Us, NYC Rats Say
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Obese Tourists Breathe Sigh Of Relief As New York Soda Ban Lifted
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The U.S. Department of Weather States That The Statue of Liberty Could End Up Buried In Snow Up To Her Derriere
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Cartoon Characters Squawk at NYC Press Conference
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No Parking: A Story of Revenge
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New York Man Reaches Good Stopping Point in Relationship
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Many Democrats Are Now Wanting Gov. Andrew Cuomo to Throw His Hat Into the Presidential Ring
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Susan Sarandon's Breasts, JeLo's Butt Protest Disease, Famine, "Bad Stuff"
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Osama's Niece Is A Terrorist.
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Brooke Astor strikes back
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McDonalds Opens Store In New York City For Only Halal Food
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Terror Trial Slated for Governor's Island
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John Gotti Endorses Paladino For New York Godfather
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New York City To Build A 113 Story Parking Garage
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New York officials investigating 'Walking Dead' Zombie stunt!
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Ice Bucket Shortage Plagues U.S.
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Trump Threatens to Send Scientists That Talk About Global Warming to Jail for Spreading Fake News
