50 Cent Awarded Purple Heart

Funny story written by CamoDude

Friday, 4 March 2005

NEW YORK, NEW YORK-- At a packed press conference in 50 Cent's hometown, President Bush made an appearance to honor 50 for his remarkable accomplishments and achievements to the hood and the gangsta way of life. Many of 50's friends were on hand to celebrate this wonderful occasion and so were some of his many enemies as well. Security was thick in case a brawl was to ensue.

The Purple Heart is awarded to the common soldier for wounds that he sustained by weapons in the hands of an enemy. With all the song references to wars on the streets and being a "soldier", 50 Cent was able to meet this criteria unconditionally.

"I can't believe it has taken this long to award this valliant young man the Purple Heart," said Bush. "His noble and heroic efforts have gotten him shot 10 or more times yet, he is still with us today," the President went onto say. "He makes me and he should make all of you proud as well to be a citizen of these great states."

With this announcement comes controversy though. It appears that a group of 50's enemies are running a T.V. commercial questioning his Purple Heart and threatening his chances of winning more Video Music Awards this year. With the 2004 VMA's on Sunday August 29th, 50 Cent needs to somehow silence this group if he wants a shot at the awards.

This "group" is known as, Original Gangsters For Truth. And, they are smearing 50's street credibility with every commercial they put out.

One commercial says that Ja Rule, the main guy leading the attacks, served with 50 on a crack cocaine deal in Harlem back in 1996. Ja goes onto say that when things heated up, 50 bailed and he was the one that took a bullet, not 50. "50 only recieved a scrape on his arm out of the deal and was able to apply self-aid," added Ja Rule.

Rap artist Jay-Z also says in a commercial that his music video 99 problems, is about himself taking bullets for a scared and frightend 50 when a heroin deal went bad in a dark alley in the Bronx. The artists in this group have also claimed that the hospital records for any of 50's gunshot wounds can't be found anywhere.

50 Cent has immediately condemned these Original Gangsters For Truth advertisements saying they are slanderous and lack credibility. "No one will believe these ads, why because I'm 50," boasted 50 Cent. "I'm going to go to the Video Music Awards on Sunday and still bring in at least six VMA's," bragged 50.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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