Every Secret Service Agent That Protected Him Said That He Reminded Them of An Orange-Looking Hitler

Funny story written by Abel Rodriguez

Friday, 1 July 2022

image for Every Secret Service Agent That Protected Him Said That He Reminded Them of An Orange-Looking Hitler
"Damn! It looks like Trump combs his hair with firecrackers!" -SEN LIZ CHENEY

WASHINGTON, D.C. - (Satire News) - One Secret Service agent who was assigned to Trump has just come out with a new book on the Trumptard.

The book is called, "I Protected Trump - But I Felt As If I Was Actually Protecting Hitler."

The tell-all book was written by Wilford A. Ruckenberry, who was assigned to guard Trump 24/7.

Ruckenberry writes in his book that Trump was really nothing more than an arrogant, conceited little piece of shit, who demanded his way 100% of the time, even when he knew he was totally wrong.

The author of Trump's book also wrote that he had never, ever seen a father kiss his grown daughter on the mouth more than Trump kissed Ivanka.

Ruckenberry saw that many times Ivanka would simply kiss her father against her better judgement.

The author revealed that one time up in Green Bay, Wisconsin, Trump started to kiss Ivanka on her lips and she quickly kicked him in his balls.

She told him that she was afraid of getting his Trumpapalooza virus germs.

SIDENOTE: Ruckenberry's book is 419 pages long, and has over 91 personal photos, along with 6 charcoal drawings.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot