If Trump Slanders You, You’re Doing Something Right
Donald Trump has a habit of trying to slander his critics and even someone who out-sines him. Out-shines? That’s just about everyone except for Giuliani. They are equals. Take Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi. After raising five children, she r…
Read full storyA White House Insider Reveals Trump Will Flee the Country on January 19
WASHINGTON, D.C. – (Satire News) – A highly-respected White House insider has overheard President Trump telling Michael Flynn and Kayleigh McEnany, that there is no way on earth he is going to go to prison. POTUS, who is in deep shit, as they say…
Read full storyAstroZenzena - The New Cure For The Trumpapalooza Virus?
OXFORD, England – (Satire News) – It appears that in the race to find a vaccine for the Coronavirus, AstroZenzena may actually be better than either Pfizer or Moderna. Hundreds of scientists working with AstroZenzena have stated that their product…
Read full storyManchester United sign Maradona's unknown son!
(NOT EDITED) United's scouting system knows no boundaries when searching for global talent. However, they have beaten the rest to an unknown whizz-kid, who no other club knew about until the sad death of the Argentinian Footy Magician. Maradona, w…
Read full storySleepy Joe The Great: President Of The Holy Roiling Empire
BILLINGSGATE POST: Not since Pope Leo III crowned Charlemagne as Imperator Augustus on December 25, 800 has a man been so deified by the masses. Sleepy Joe the Great is in step to follow Charles the Great, who ruled the Holy Roman Empire until he die…
Read full storyDallas Cowboys Cheerleaders In Cheering Glitch
In a mix-up of gargantuan proportions, the Washington Redskins overwhelmed their rivals, the Dallas Cowboys, consigning them to yet another embarrassing loss, but there was controversy all the way through the contest, with the Dallas cheerleading tea…
Read full storyLonely old f*ck invited to Biden White House following Thanksgiving behavior modeling
This week Mr. Biden appealed to the country to keep Thanksgiving small, very small, in order “to snuff out the virus.” It is now understood he was also seeking “behavior models” on this matter, and this has led to discovery of a LOF ready, willing…
Read full storyBiden to Give a Free Puppy to Every Illegal Immigrant
In a pledge to the American people that has shocked political observers, President-elect Joe Biden has committed to giving a free Labrador puppy to all illegal immigrants caught crossing into America through Mexico. “These poor people have been de…
Read full storyWashington Turns The Dallas Cowboys Into Turkeys
DALLAS – (Sports Satire) – After most Dallas Cowboys fans had their Thanksgiving Turkey meal at home, they drove to Cowboy Stadium, where they saw lots and lots of turkeys dressed in white, gray, and blue Dallas uniforms. The Cowpokes just cannot…
Read full storyJoe Biden Agrees To Meet With Vladimir Putin
DOVER, Delaware – (Satire News) – Vox Populi says that President-Elect Joe Biden is wasting no time in trying to patch up the US-Russia differences, and has agreed to meet with Russia’s President Putin in February. The planned meeting will take pl…
Read full storyPresident Trump is Excited About Implementing a Federal Traveling Firing Squad
WASHINGTON, D.C. – (Satire News) – A White House insider has revealed that Melania Trump is extremely upset at her husband, because he wants to make a Presidential Executive Order that would allow the U.S. government to shoot prisoners, instead of pu…
Read full storyDonald Trump Is Calling It Quits
Donald J. Trump says he’s had enough abuse, and Donald J. is calling it quits. He is resigning: “The 2020 election was stolen from me, like a car-jack and Mike Pence can take over. He'll manage a superbly terrific job, living here in the White House…
Read full storyLocal Scientist and Teen Killed in Freak Delorean Accident
An eccentric inventor and local teen were killed yesterday when the Delorean in which they were riding crashed into a wall at an estimated 80 mph. Martin McFly, 18, and Dr. Emmett ‘Doc’ Brown, age unavailable, were pronounced “really dead” at the…
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