10 Future Signs the Nation Is Headed in the Wrong Direction
New York -- Over 74% of Americans believe that the nation is "off on the wrong track," according to a recent survey conducted for The Wall Street Journal and NBC News. The pessimistic figure is the worst since October 2008, when 78% said that the country is headed in the wrong direction. But the trick here is not to dwell in the past, but to look ahead and identify forthcoming signals that i...
Read full storyBBC admit: Frozen Planet filmed in Iceland (the supermarket)
BBC bosses have today admitted faking a number of scenes in their wildlife showcase piece Frozen Planet, which viewers had assumed were filmed in the wild. In fact most of the scenes were filmed in the Iceland, not the country but a branches of the s...
Read full storyLocal Teen Falls Into Well, Looks Stupid
In Birmingham, Alabama today local teenager, Chet McDaniels was out skateboarding with his friends when they came across an old well. When asked if he could jump it on his skateboard, McDaniels reportedly replied "I bet you a million bucks I could!"...
Read full storyAngelina Jolie Is Very Depressed Because Brad Pitt Is Planning To Leave Her After The Christmas Holidays
PROVENCE, France - Angelina Jolie, who many consider to be one of the world's most beautiful women and a talented actress has shown her weak side. According to Gigi de Maupassant with France's Le News Agency Ms. Jolie has been acting extremely err...
Read full storyNewt Gingrich Replaces Herman Cain As Front Runner - This Month
Trice married Newton Leroy Gingrich is replacing Herman Cain both as the front runner of the Republican presidential nomination and in the ladies department. As yet, no ladies have stepped forward claiming extensive courtship, flowers, Tiffany gifts...
Read full storyMale gay penguin finds female penguin pussy more attractive!
The "ice cold" truth about male gays, penguins that is, has now been witnessed in a Canadian zoo. After spending many warm winters snuggled up together, Pedro and his intimate buddy, Buddy, have decided to split up because a wretched female has enter...
Read full storyHiggs Boson found at BBC
The elusive Higgs Boson - the theorised particle which inspired a 10 billion pound hole in the ground has been found. Well so the BBC would have you believe. The BBC, famed for producing misleading 'factual' programming claims to have photographed...
Read full storyExcitement mounts as The Hadron Collider shows a flash of nipple
The most coveted prize in particle physics - the Higgs bosom - may have been glimpsed, say researchers reporting at the Large Hadron Collider (LHC) in Geneva today. The Higgs Bosom is purported to be the means by which everything in the Universe o...
Read full storyObama Finally Admits: "I'm just in it for the crepes."
On a rainy day in Washington, I met with President Obama in a small diner just several blocks from the White House. We met to discuss the challenges faced working with such a boisterous opposing party. When he arrived he quickly ordered the crepes an...
Read full storyHenry Upt-Ight to Tell the World, "I'm actually pretty easy going."
Henry Upt-Ight, a local bed and breakfast owner, claims to have been cursed with a name wrongly identifying a personality trait. Upt-Ight wants the world to know how easy going and relaxed of a person he can actually be. I meet Henry at the Upt-Ig...
Read full storyHiggs boson - The 'god Particle' explained
By now most people will have heard of the so called 'god Particle,' but, do you know what it is or why people are trying to find it? Here is a brief explanation of its worth to mankind and what might happen if we fail to find it: Just like the similarly named comedy duo that reopened Mumbles pier in 1998, the Higgs boson particle has never been seen. It exists in the minds of leather elbowed b...
Read full storyEuro wackjobs suspected as hand grenade siege hits Belgian town
Liege - Federalist nutz are the top suspects behind a hand grenade attack in the Belgian town of Liege. Guns were fired amid a series of explosions outside a bus stop in the town's main square Place Saint Lambert. The landmark location is named...
Read full storyYoung Apprentice 'Tragedy For English Language'
An A-level student with 'wisdom beyond her years' has been crowned the BBC's Young Apprentice 2011. Zara Brownless, 16, won the accolade by impressing Lord Sugar with her online video game Piggy Panic. He told her: "You are calm, articulate and...
Read full storyBusiness Briefs hit the shelves
The high street store for the intelligentsia, Sparks and Mensa, are launching a new range of underwear for the economically minded executive: Business Briefs. This new range of stylish undergarment comes in three varieties. The lowest priced in...
Read full storyMembers of X-Factor winners Little Mix revealed to be judges' love children
Winners of this year's X-Factor and Simon Cowell's new banking machine, or "Little Micks", as the four-girl group prefers to be known, have been revealed as love children of the entire X-Factor judging panel and more. Jade Thirlwall, who speaks a...
Read full storyThames 'Nessie' lurks outside 2012 Stadium
London - "Maybe it's escaped from the Princess Diana Memorial Fountain," is how one wildlife expert assessed the situation this morning. Wildlife shots of the mystery beastie - definitely not doctored by the BBC or David Attenborough - show a Loc...
Read full storyWhat will teaching be like in 2035?
Teachers who are currently forty-five years of age will still be teaching in 2035 aged sixty-eight. At least those who make it will. This makes it highly relevant to ask what teaching will be like when they finally limp over the retirement finish line. The Spoof contacted futurologist James Randi, and asked him. "The teaching profession was remarkably resistant to change for centuries," said...
Read full storyClegg Mystery Solved
The non-arrival of Nick Clegg at the House of Commons to sit beside David Cameron justifying his cock up over Europe has been explained. 'To begin with David has this problem, which makes sitting beside him difficult. He farts continuously' said C...
Read full storyUniversity Challenge: Pembroke Fix Nottingham Good
Quite simply, the Cambridge outfit from Pemroke were just too good for Nottingham, who probably woke up the following day needing a dose of medicine from local outfit Boot's The Chemist. Nottingham took the first starter but that was it for the team from the East Midlands. Pembroke College, Cambridge, were generally faster on the button - and even when they weren't in the later stages, Nottingh...
Read full storyDentists want a reduction from 5-a-day
Dentists across the UK are opposed to government measures to increase the so-called 5-a-day, and want the opposite. "We need Britons to reduce to three a day, or even two a day," said Denby Twist of the Dorking Dentistry School. "The last thing we...
Read full storyStudents Arrested for Selling Homosexual Lawn Grass
DES MOINES: Several students in Des Moines, Iowa have been arrested for allegedly selling homosexual lawn grass. The arrest comes after several men started to complain of unusual and unnatural feelings for the same sex. The special grass, a uni...
Read full storyAdam Sandler Doesn't Care That 97% of All Movie Critics Panned His Latest Movie "Jack and Jill"
HOLLYWOOD - Adam Sandler says that he does give a flying flip what 97% of the movie critics said, he still feels that his latest motion picture Jack and Jill is one of the best comedies ever made and he truly believes that it could win several Academ...
Read full storyRolling Stones Announce 50th Anniversary World Tour
London - On the heels of a meeting between Keith Richards and Mick Jagger, the Rolling Stones have announced plans for their 50th Anniversary World tour. The aging duo of Jagger and Richards met for several hours today plotting out how to best cel...
Read full storyPrisons Change to Blue Flannel Jumpsuits; Shankings Down
Lee Henry Morgan, Warden at California's San Quentin Prison is breathing a sigh of relief these days as the number of shankings in this infamously dangerous prison have decreased greatly over the past several months. "I wouldn't have believed it...
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