Web users warned about social networking site MyBankDetails.com
Consumer groups are warning users not to use a new social networking website called MyBankDetails.com.
Read full storyPutin is a fascist whoremaster says NATO
NATO HQ, Brussels - (Armageddon Press): NATO military intelligence officials reacted with derision today at Vladimir Sputum's latest remarks urging the West to "drop its silly Atlantic solidarity" campaign.
Read full storyAishwarya Rai the Goddess: India culture minister offers to quit
Mumbai, India - (Mythological Mess): India's culture minister Ambika Soni has offered to quit in a row over whether Bollywood actress Aishwarya Rai is a reincrnated Hindu goddess.
Read full storyNew drug hits the streets
After a damming report, by boffins at Southampton University, which stated that a mixture of commonly used food colourings could cause hyperactivity in children, drug users have cleared supermarket shelves of all leading confectionery products.
Read full storyHelvetica font kidnapped
During a celebrity showing of Gary Hustwit's film "Helvetica" the famous font was kidnapped by an previously unknow group of Apple Mac fanatics.
Read full storyVanessa Hudgens to be the new face of Estee Lauder tampons
New York - (Ass-related Press): The House of Lauder is recruiting High School Musical starlet Vanessa Hudgens on a $5 million, two year contract to be the face (sic!) of its newly launched Estee Lauder Tampon.
Read full storyRosie Bashes Old People - Baby Boomers Retaliate
(Hollywood) - In another case of celebrity bad behavior, fat lesbian self-destructive Rosie O'Donnell, in her recent book, "Fat Pig Lesbian", called for older people such as Barbara Walters to voluntarily step aside or be forced to reti...
Read full storyPortuguese cops think Pope is shielding Kate McCann
Portimao, Portugal - (Disaster Press): Lip-readers hired by the Portimao police have told the Special Porsecutor reviewing evidence in the Maddie McCann case that Pope Joseph Ratzinger might be shielding Kate McCann.
Read full storyCOBRA meets as £50 billion Northern-on-the-Rocks black hole points to Lord Levy tosser CEO
City of London - (Disaster Mess): The Government's COBRA emergency management committee has met today amid Financial Services Authority reports that the Northern Rock building society has a £50 billion black hole in its acounts.
Read full storyEx-Police singer Sting stung outside German brothel
Hamburg, Germany - (Spotted Ass Mess): As deafening Frankie Goes to Hollywood lyrics blared out into the early morning Hamburg streets on Wednesday this week former Police singer Sting got an unexpected surprise outside the city's notor...
Read full storyGerman cardinal hails Nazi trashing of 'gay' modern art
Cologne, Germany - (Ass Meserschmitts): Cologne's primate Cardinal Joachim Meisner has said modern art, especialy gay artists' conceptual work, is a lot of tosh "that should be incinerated" along with the vast majority of non-Arian...
Read full storyDame Judi Dench in love tryst with Commander James Bond
MI5 handlers are reportedly furious that top secret agent James Bond has been caught with his pants down on the job with his crusty boss Dame Judi Dench (also known as M).
Read full storyIs it Check-mate for 'Chessboard Killer', Alexander Pushpinkov?
Russian police made a gruesome discovery in Bitsa Park, a forest, Southwest of Moscow; when they uncovered 16 bodies so far. Whoever the killer is, has been nicknamed the 'Beast of Bitsa' - because there are bitsa bodies everywhere!...
Read full storyLeeds Fans Can See The Point Now
Leeds United got their first points of the season with a 3-0 away win at Bristol Rovers last night, and supporters celebrated by smashing up half of the West Country.
Read full storyEngland Edged Out By South Africa
England pushed South Africa hard in Paris last night, but, in the end, it was the Springboks superior strength, determination, fitness, skill and quality that nudged them clear of the World Cup holders. It was a close game, and from the early exch...
Read full storyGerbils: Human Guinea Pigs
10 Gerbils were catapulted into space today for a twelve day voyage. These mammals, often under-utilized as household pets, are now being vitally employed in the field of scientific research.
Read full storyUS Housing Disaster and Market Mess "All My Fault" Says Alan Greenspan
WASHINGTON (FMLiveWire) -- Alan Greenspan says blame him for the American housing disaster and the latest mess in financial markets here and throughout the world.
Read full storyDiary Hopes Dashed
Prosecutors in the Disappearance of Evidence Case have had their hopes dashed yet again with another case of disappearing evidence.
Read full storyPolice try to question OJ about theft; former NFL star threatens suicide and flees in Ford Bronco
Las Vegas - Police investigating the theft of sporting memorabilia from a hotel announced that the main suspect was OJ Simpson. Simpson, who had claimed ownership of the goods, promptly stole a white Ford Bronco, pla...
Read full storyDick Cheney Admits He Is Gay
Startling observers on both sides of the Isles, Vice President Dick Cheney, on Tuesday, announced that he was 'Coming out of the Closet' and admitting that he is gay.
Read full storyJenny Craig's latest spokesmodel: Britney! Move over Kirstie Alley and Valerie Bertinelli. No. Really. Move over, Okay?
Los Angeles, California - Move over Kirstie Alley, move over Valerie Bertinelli here come Britney! After her catastrophic performance on the MTV's Video Music Awards, Britney's family and friends have decided they have no choice but to conduc...
Read full storyMore sexy pics of Vanessa Hudgens appear on the Web; caught playing tonsil-hockey with her 'girlfriend' in hot seductive lesbian poses
Cyberspace - As if having naked pictures of her splattered on the Web was not bad enough for the squeaky clean image of Disney's High School Musical 2 sweetheart, Vanessa Hudgens. Now photos of her apparently French kissing one girlfriend, smacking l...
Read full storyBishop Bonkers Identifies Farrant as UFO-Conjuring Witch
After months of investigation into alleged sightings of UFO's over Bournemouth, the British Occult Ley Line Organisation & Xylophonists headed by Dr. Roger Carp released its report today, entitled "The Bishop Bonkers Papers". B.O.L.L.O.
Read full storyDr. Phil In Need Of More Clichés
Prominent psychologist and television personality Phil McGraw, who demands to be affectionately known as Dr. Phil, is looking to expand his collection of trite one-liners and vague meaningless bullshit used to counsel guests on his show.
Read full storyBritney blames her lackluster MTV Video Music Award performance on a bad hair day
Las Vegas, Nevada - Looking like a wardrobe malfunction in progress. Sounding like poorly dubbed Chinese Kung Fu movie where the actors' lips do not match up to voiceover track at times. Surrounded by more youthful looking, energetic dancers that...
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