Residents of Mayberry hit with rash of multi-syllable words including, "conurbation"
Residents of the sleepy little town of Mayberry, North Carolina didn't know what hit them after a rash of multi-syllable words swept through their town yesterday. Language analysts and detectives say that the words were traced to middle school st...
Read full storyIs WMD fantasist 'Curve Ball' really David 'Bend-It-Like' Beckham?
Badheim, Germany - (AssoCIAted Mess): US intelligence sources are probing reports that the Iraqi defector Rafid Ahmed Alwan, code-named Curve Ball, who spun such whopping great big porkies about Iraq's purported WMD program, is really a...
Read full storyIs the Corrupt Bastards Club pulling the strings in the $40 billion Alaskan stash?
Juneau, Alaska - (Graft, Bribery & Embezzlement Mess): The US Justice Department is probing reports that the Alaskan Corrupt Bastards Club is pulling the strings that control the state's $40 billion Alaska Permanent Fund which doshes up...
Read full storyCalifornia Senator Feinstein Votes to support Mukasey for Attorney General
"We decided to let George Bush go ahead and have his fun with waterboarding, until his term ends," Feinstien remarked, yesterday, when she stated that she will vote to confirm Michael Mukasey for Attorney general, even though he doesn't...
Read full storyBBC Unveils Strictly Naked Come Dancing Xmas Special
BBC TV Center, London - (Ass Mess): The Xmas TV ratings war has kicked off early with the BBC unveiling a strippers' version of its flagship moron programme Strictly Come Dancing.
Read full storySearch for Madeleine Continues as New Photofit released
Gerry McCann went back to work as a cardiologist at Glenfield Hospital in Leicester, England this week. Looking sexy ater his boob job, he said that he and his wife Kate had done as much as they could in the search f...
Read full storySatirist King David arrested for watering plants
Satirist and imponderable soap box washer, King David reported himself arrested today while watering his plants (not pants). The 44-year-old character assassin said that he was standing in his front yard watering a lowly crocus when Durham police spo...
Read full storyWriters Vote To Strike - TheSpoof.com Unaffected
(Hollywood) - In spite of a writer's strike crippling the entertainment business, it's business as usual at TheSpoof.com ...
Read full storyComet 17P/Holmes For Sale on Ebay
Pasadena, California (IP) - Comet 17P/Holmes is on sale on Ebay and the starting price is $19.95. The seller is Dr. Holmes who discovered the comet.
Read full storyComet 17P/Holmes Puts on Spectacular Show
Mount Palomar, California (IP) - Comet 17P/Holmes has been putting on a spectacular show. The comet is currently located in Perseus in the northeast sky at night and is shinning at about 3rd magnitude.
Read full story'For a few Escudos More' - Sir Ian Blair recruited by Portuguese Police
Britain's top cop, Sir Ian Blair, second cousin to Lionel Blair, danced with joy today (Joy is his wife) as he has been approached by the Portuguese Police with a possible employment opportunity.
Read full storyUS to use "terracotta" diplomats for service in Iraq?
After the state department emailed 250 diplomats and told them that they may be asked to fill over 50 positions in Iraq next year, outrage was sparked in those individuals that received the mail.
Read full storySHOCK as Graham Norton admits that he is a Homophobe!
The entertainment world is shocked as Graham Norton, today confessed that although he is outwardly gay; he is in fact a rabid homophobe.
Read full storyRon Paul Now President Of The United States
George W Bush in a special message from the Oval Office announced that Ron Paul would soon be sworn in as President of the United States by the Chief Justice of the Supreme Court.
Read full storyPresident vetoes support of a terracotta navy
The president vetoed support of a terracotta navy today as congress tries to find solutions for an overstretched army. Originally, congress proposed to send navy servicemen into the army to fill the gaps left by declining numbers in that branch of se...
Read full storyBarbara Streisand Denies She's Had Plastic Surgery
The massive diva Babs Streiand has firmly denied she has ever been near a sharp scalpel, let alone laid down legs akimbo on a surgeons table.
Read full storyAsstronaut blows hole in international space station; beans blamed
An American asstronaut blew a hole in one of the international space station's East, West, South, North facing walls last night as he got up to go to the bathroom. The incident happened around midnight as Discovery crew member, Colonel David Bowi...
Read full storyBush Denies Monkey Business
President Bush has furiously denied that a monkey features in his family tree: 'This is crap - my great, great grand daddy was NOT a chimp! We had doves in our family tree!'...
Read full storyMicrosoft's Bill Gates Purchases US Treasury
ISWIRE News - After long discussions among administration officials on how to reinstate the US Dollar as the official world reserve currency, all hope was just about lost until Henry Paulson Jr, Secretary of the Treasury, remembered a suggestion mad...
Read full storyCarol Vorderman Doesn't Throw Her Clothes Away Very Often
Carol Vorderman, the 'letters girl' from the crap TV game show Countdown, made history yesterday when, for the 25th Anniversary of the show, she wore the same pair of brown suedette trousers...
Read full storyMister Meaner To Marry Threadpit Girl
Rumours are circulating that Mister Meaner, the acclaimed writer and social misfit, is to marry the astonishingly sexy Threadpit Girl, who can be seen on satirical news website The Spoof. The Girl, clad variously in tight-fitting red T-shirts and...
Read full storyBush employs terracotta army to join US forces in Iraq
With 50% enlistment down amongst African American and Hispanic recruits, it was reported today that President Bust would be sending in terracotta soldiers to fill in for the desperately needed men to fight his war in Iraq.
Read full storyRoger Federer to Play 2008 Wearing 5 to 10 Pounds of Ankle Weights On Each Leg!
Switzerland - In a rare interview from Roger Federer's home in Switzerland, the world Number 1 tennis player has an interesting proposition to the rest of the world's ATP players. "I'm sick of winning so easily," said Roger, &qu...
Read full storyFake Interviews With Real People - Sen. James Inhofe
A growing number of hippies and tree-hugging fools, undeservedly referring to themselves 'scientists', are presenting the theory that the earth is experiencing a potentially catastrophic unnatural warming. Based on a large body of something called 'empirical evidence', these so-called 'scientists' are claiming that this warming of the earth is being heavily influenced by h...
Read full storyU.S. Doctors Separate Conjoined Twin Pygmy Elephants
San Diego Wild Animal Park - Two California doctors worked feverishly over the weekend to separate a pair of critically endangered Borneo Elephants that were born as conjoined twins.
Read full storyThe Queen Is Pregnant!
Buckingham Palace has denied rumours that the Queen is pregnant by issuing the following official statement directly from the Queen yourself:...
Read full storyRoyal Spokesperson Has Denied Royal Inflagrante Dilecto!
In the latest sensational twist in the Royal Orgy story, an anonymous royal spokesperson has said that there was no 'inflagrante dilecto' and that this was 'de facto scripto rex!' and also 'evidence of nothing happening at all rea...
Read full storyHeather Mills Critical!
Heather Mills has been involved in an accident with a posse of paparazzi and fell foul of the law for beating up three old women.
Read full storyEndangered Hoop Snakes Making a Comeback!
UPIAPBBCCBSCNNFOX- Martha May Daltry was walking home from school last week in Northfolk, Virginia when she saw something rolling down the road next to her. At first she thought it was a bike tire, perhaps pushed by a friend to frighten her, but nobo...
Read full storyNon-Dairy Cows To Go On Strike!
WisCONsin - Did you enjoy that Non-Dairy creamer in your coffee today? How about that Non-Dairy milk substitute for the lactose intolerant? Ever wonder where these products and many more Non-Dairy products come from? Well where else! They come from N...
Read full story"No Christmas Trees This Year!" Says Union President Paris Hilton
The International Christmas Tree Growers Union voted to strike today over the growing trend by people to use fake Christmas trees. President Paris Hilton says that Union Members are fed up with the growing trend towards plastic trees and called for a...
Read full storyGiant head of I-CANN, Vint Cerf angered by travelers
It was reported today in Los Angeles that four travelers and a dog arrived at the steps of I-CANN (Internet Corporation for Assigned Names and Numbers) and asked to speak with the father of the internet, Vint Cerf.
Read full storyParis Hilton's Halloween Porn Shopping Spree
Paris Hilton donning a Scream mask and skeleton suit entered a Canadian porn shop during the Halloween festivities last week approached the counter and demanded the shop take down her likeness, a cardboard cutout of her obviously advertising One Nigh...
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