'For a few Escudos More' - Sir Ian Blair recruited by Portuguese Police

Funny story written by IN SEINE

Saturday, 3 November 2007

image for 'For a few Escudos More' - Sir Ian Blair recruited by Portuguese Police
A FEW ESCUDOS MORE?

Britain's top cop, Sir Ian Blair, second cousin to Lionel Blair, danced with joy today (Joy is his wife) as he has been approached by the Portuguese Police with a possible employment opportunity.

Talking from his home in Letsby Avenue, Sir Ian, (28) told In Seine news: "I've had a bit of a rough deal this year and find myself in deep water over my 'trigger happy' juniors. It seems that everyone is pushing me to resign - even the Portuguese Police. However, they are the only ones to offer me a better position than I've got now."

He then produced an airmail letter from his jacket pocket and read it aloud to me;

"Dear Sir Ian, you must be aware that both of our police services are hitting the news a lot this year. Since Saddam Hussein has gone, there is no REAL news to report so they pick on us, or you. I just want to tell you that if you do resign and want a better job, we can offer you one as Police Commissioner for Portugal. You will have a luxury villa with swimming pool, a chauffeur driven car; driven by Monsieur Jean Paul, (Henri Paul's younger [teetotal] brother) and a salary of 28,846,329 (about £100,000) per annum. It is always sunshine here"

"PS because you are a knight, does that mean you are Royalty? We have always wanted a British royal family connection! Sincere yours Mario Gonzalez."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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