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Funny satire stories about Wayne Rooney

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Funny story: Paul Scholes Crocks 'Judas' Rooney In Training Ground Horror Tackle

Paul Scholes Crocks 'Judas' Rooney In Training Ground Horror Tackle

Speculation grew today that want away striker, baldy Scouser, Wayne Rooney may have played his last game for Manchester United. News leaking out from Carrington indicated some kind of horror tackle by Scholes, which left the Scouse lothario writhi...

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Funny story: Wayne Rooney Exclusive: It's Synchronised Swimming!

Wayne Rooney Exclusive: It's Synchronised Swimming!

We can exclusively reveal that it's not money or the attraction of another club that is pulling Wayne Rooney away from Manchester United. He wants to perform in Britain's synchronised swimming team at the 2012 Olympics in London! The shocking n...

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Funny story: Rooney Won't Sign New Deal - Can't Write Own Name

Rooney Won't Sign New Deal - Can't Write Own Name

Wayne Rooney looks set to leave Manchester United because he will not, or cannot, sign a new deal at the club. The England striker is not thought to be interested in a move away from Old Trafford, but is understood to be physically unable to write...

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Funny story: HMS Ark Royal a gift for the WAG who has everything

HMS Ark Royal a gift for the WAG who has everything

News that HMS Ark Royal is to be taken out of service, immediately, has sparked a furious row between the WAG's of UK based footballers. "It's what no one else can have and I want it" the wife of a famous Chelsea player told NMC News today. Sev...

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Funny story: The Big Match: Chewing Gum Fergie Versus £200 per Ciggy Pack Wazza.

The Big Match: Chewing Gum Fergie Versus £200 per Ciggy Pack Wazza.

Old Trafford, Manchester: £200 per Ciggy Pack Wazza who has not been loyal to his wife, understandably is not loyal to his football club and now wants a move from Manchester United and Chewing Gum Fergie. In what has been classic Chewing Gum Ferg...

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Funny story: "The Chosen One" only wants Rooney if he learns proper English, mate!

"The Chosen One" only wants Rooney if he learns proper English, mate!

Jose Mourinho "The Chosen One" has shown interest in unsettled, once upon a time Superstar, Wayne Rooney. His club Real Madrid will do anything what Mourinho requests and have no problems offering Wayne a job at Real Madrid. There are though se...

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Funny story: Rooney To Stay At United - But He Will Be Farmed Out In Loan Deal

Rooney To Stay At United - But He Will Be Farmed Out In Loan Deal

According to inside news leaked from Lou Macari's chippy, under fire United striker Wayne Rooney will be staying at Manchester United, but will be farmed out by the club on a twelve month loan deal until the dust settles. Most probably to Tranmere...

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Funny story: Roo and Fergie in Love

Roo and Fergie in Love

Wayne Rooney and Sarah Ferguson have been captured together on the floor of a Manchester nightclub scoring. Fergie shouted in glee as the striker hit home. Wayne told your reporter, tipped off about this encounter, that he felt closer to the Queen...

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Funny story: Wayne: I want Chelsea.

Wayne: I want Chelsea.

Rooney officially has come out and said that he wants to quit Manchester United. The overpaid and over-laid Manchester United forward, and former Blueboy, told his boss that he wants to go to "Chelsea". But not to the club. Yes, it's 24 year...

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Funny story: One a Blue, Always a [insert team colour here]. Rooney's on the Run

One a Blue, Always a [insert team colour here]. Rooney's on the Run

It seems his tenure at Old Trafford is finally coming to an end. Following allegations that he had chatted to another woman via Facebook the other night, Sir Alex Ferguson commented how "he'd had his last chance. He's still up to his old ways and...

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Funny story: Wayne Rooney is going nowhere, says Colleen

Wayne Rooney is going nowhere, says Colleen

Media speculation has been mounting over the departure of Wayne Rooney from Manchester United after a supposed bust-up between him and Alex Ferguson. However, according to his wife, Colleen Rooney, Rooney will be staying in Manchester. There has b...

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Funny story: Rooney To Join Ronaldo At Real?

Rooney To Join Ronaldo At Real?

Despite continued denials from Manchester United officials to the contrary, the smart money down Sir Matt Busby Way seems to be on baldy Scouse striker Wayne Rooney departing to Real Madrid in the January transfer window. Insiders say that Sir Ale...

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Funny story: Rooney to leave Manchester United

Rooney to leave Manchester United

Wayne Rooney has confirmed he is to leave Manchester United next summer. In an exclusive interview he said: 'My heart lies elsewhere and so it's not fair on the fans.' Rooney was once a world number one however of late his talents have fallen shor...

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Funny story: Wayne Rooney Romantically Linked To Sir Alex Ferguson's Wife?

Wayne Rooney Romantically Linked To Sir Alex Ferguson's Wife?

Rumours are tonight circulating that Wayne Rooney could have played his last game for Manchester United after the striker was alleged to have been romantically involved with manager Sir Alex Ferguson's wife, Cathy. It's thought that Rooney may hav...

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Funny story: Wayne Rooney Real Madrid Latest

Wayne Rooney Real Madrid Latest

Manchester United and England striker Wayne Rooney could be on his way to Spanish giants Real Madrid in the January transfer window, if a bloke on a bus I was on today is to be believed. Rooney, 24, whose current contract expires in 2012, has appa...

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Funny story: Coleen's revenge

Coleen's revenge

Wayne Rooney has been seen in central Manchester with his mother-in-law, Colette. Sources close to the family are saying that Coleen decided to send Rooney on a shopping trip with her mum, in an attempt to rebuild the bridges he destroyed, while he w...

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Funny story: Wayne And Colleen - Prague Trip Passes Safely

Wayne And Colleen - Prague Trip Passes Safely

There were sighs of relief throughout eastern and central Europe this week as Wayne and Coleen returned home from Prague without sparking a 30-year conflict. As we reported last week, there were concerns that Coleen might exact a terrible revenge...

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