Mom Tells Son That Eating Fruit And Vegetables Will Make Him Grow Up Big And Strong

Funny story written by Monkey Woods

Wednesday, 19 August 2020

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Klondike's preferred object of sustenance

Looking after your children properly and administering good advice is what being a parent is all about, and that's what one caring mom was thinking yesterday when she advised her four-year-old son that eating fruit and vegetables would make him big and strong, like his dad.

Mandy Arbuckle, 26, and her husband, Dave, have been having trouble with their son, Klondike, 4, and his eating habits.

The wayward youngster likes to eat pizza, hamburgers, hot dogs, chocolate and ice cream, but dismisses without discussion anything that might grow out of the ground.

Mandy said:

"He's very picky. We've told him time and time again, that he has to watch what he eats, what with being a bit of a porker, and having two fat bastards for parents, but he flatly refuses."

Mandy and Dave are both obese, and Klondike, whose friends at kindergarten already call "Fatty", is going down the same bulbous road.

Fatty won't be 5 until next June, but already tips the scales at 110 pounds.

His mom said:

"We've tried to get him interested in apples, oranges, bananas, and pears, but he just turns his nose up. We also serve him carrots, broccoli, cauliflower, and mushrooms, but he won't touch them."

Dave said:

"Mandy told him that, if he ate his fruit and vegetables, he'd grow up to be a big, strong guy like me, but he just said that he wasn't bothered about being strong."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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