Written by TonySofas

Tuesday, 28 August 2018

image for "Absolutely everything is OK" declares May.
Everything is brilliant, says Theresa May.

In a follow up to her enthusiasm about a No Deal Brexit being A-OK-not-a-problem, Theresa May has issued a reassuring statement relating to absolutely anything which may crop up, informing the British public, "it'll probably be fine".

This follows concerns that the country could potentially face some problems, generally, in the future, based on historic evidence that not all things in the world run smoothly and go exactly as planned. May stated, "while we would prefer things to be as good as we could make them, and for people to have a good quality of life, if we do run into issues, that's alright too."

She went on to cite a personal experience as evidence of why it's all going to work out just fine. "I once ordered a heavy duty, chain mail necklace, named Classic. Instead, the Blingtastic was delivered, which was disconcerting. In the end though, it was alright. I actually grew to severely love the Blingtastic."

She elaborated, "If we get into a horrendous shit storm and privatise everything, lose the ability to look after citizens of any country, become the laughing stock of Europe and throw away everything our forefathers and mothers fought for, it's not the end of the world. Basically, whatever happens is alright."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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