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Has-been Farage to tour the UK reminding people of their will

Funny story: Has-been Farage to tour the UK reminding people of their will

Today, Nigel Farage cuts a tragic figure, sitting in South Mimms motorway service station with a burger and chips. He compares himself to great historical figures who also never accomplished anything - but, when pressed, he couldn't name any. Tort...

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Welcome to my Garden.

Funny story: Welcome to my Garden.

Worried about running out of food with a NO DEAL Brexit? Then worry no more! I have stockpiles of food in my garden! Marrows, my wife is throwing at me. Courgettes, she wants to shove up my arse! Broccoli, she wants to throw at our neighbours who already have a supply until Christmas. Coming soon: Tomatoes and more tomatoes, all at the same time - to throw at any passing politician.

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Little Chef Boss Sees Brexit Dividend from No Deal Chaos

Funny story: Little Chef Boss Sees Brexit Dividend from No Deal Chaos

Little Chef chairman, ardent Brexiteer, Conservative party donor, tax exile and fast food entrepreneur, Sir Tom Arto-Ketchup spoke out today about his hopes for a Brexit Dividend as a result of a no deal Brexit and Operation Stack bringing the roads...

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Boris Johnson makes his resignation speech

Funny story: Boris Johnson makes his resignation speech

After quitting the cabinet last week over the state of Brexit, Boris Johnson made his resignation speech to parliament today. Here is a transcript of what he said: "Hello, grubbledy mugwumps. I am fed up with our higgledy-arsed approach to Brexit,...

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Brexiters' new tactics of mutilation and extortion

Funny story: Brexiters' new tactics of mutilation and extortion

In the current apocalyptic and grisly political landscape of the UK, Jacob Rees-Mogg has proven himself as deranged as any serial killer. Every day for the last week he has ordered one of his Brexiter minions to sacrifice himself/herself by resigning...

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Danny Dyer Appointed as Brexit Secretary

Funny story: Danny Dyer Appointed as Brexit Secretary

"Prime Minister" Theresa May surprised both Brexiteer and Remainer members of her party today when she appointed EastEnders on-screen hard man Danny Dyer as Secretary of State for Exiting the European Union following the resignation of the previous s...

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Wetherspoon to Stop Selling Champagne and Prosecco

Funny story: Wetherspoon to Stop Selling Champagne and Prosecco

"Frankly, we don't give a toss" was the reaction of France's Champagne industry to the Wetherspoon announcement that the fusty old gits chain of pubs would cease selling Champagne and Prosecco. Shortly after his recent shock announcement that he w...

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Leprechauns to control inner-Irish border

Brussels chief negotiator Michel Barnier and UK Prime Minister Theresa May have at last broken the deadlock in the Irish border issue. Brexit Minister, David Davis, has conjured up a new proposal which has been welcomed and approved by his counterpar...

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UK government admits that "Brexit plan fag packet" is missing

Funny story: UK government admits that "Brexit plan fag packet" is missing

In an astonishing admission of incompetence and poor planning, Prime Minister Theresa May has revealed that the cigarette packet on which Brexit plans were written has been missing for nearly two years. The empty box of Marlboro Lights was probabl...

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Space Threats Rain Down on Post-Brexit UK

The UK’s defence secretary has declared that we must be “ready to counter threats from space”. He made the announcement after watching Starship Troopers and posting a live Vlog of him standing on ants. The UK has proved itself incapable of dealing...

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German Teens Condemn 'unfair' English Exam in Petition

Funny story: German Teens Condemn 'unfair' English Exam in Petition

Grappling with Brexit in one English exam proved too much for more than 30,000 German school students, who are protesting in an online petition. About 31,000 students sat the English exam in the south-west German state of Baden-Württemberg but the pe...

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Fondle The Meat Balls

Insane and somewhat destructive news has come hurtling out of Sweden today as the country admitted that it’s famed “Swedish Meatballs” are in fact “Turkish”. At the mention of foreigners Brexiteers were up in arms and The Daily Mail published a “are...

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Wetherspoon Chairman Denies Quitting Social Media and Shuts Pubs Instead

Funny story: Wetherspoon Chairman Denies Quitting Social Media and Shuts Pubs Instead

Today, in a prompt volte-face, JD Wetherspoon’s weirdo chairman Tim Martin, the last living proponent of the mullet, hair style of the gods, informed the stock exchange that, rather than quitting social media as widely reported, his pub chain was to...

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Cambridge Analytica Behind Satan’s Election to CEO of Heaven

Funny story: Cambridge Analytica Behind Satan’s Election to CEO of Heaven

HEAVEN—Cambridge Analytica has some big wins under its belt—Brexit, the election of Uhuru Kenyatta in Kenya, and Donald Trump in the Confederate States of America, but the company pulled off one of its biggest sells just last week, when it rigged an...

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New British passport to be fifty shades of blue

Whitehall officials yesterday confirmed that all British passport holders currently in possession of the Burgundy European Union document will be issued with a new passport, in fifty shades of blue, once the UK has cast off the shackles of evil, sadi...

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Labour looks forward to Boris’ “Brexit Dividend”

Funny story: Labour looks forward to Boris’ “Brexit Dividend”

Labour party members are secretly preparing for power after “Prime Minister” Theresa May refused at the weekend to back her Foreign Secretary’s continuing claim that there will be a “Brexit Dividend”. The continued and ever increasing claims eman...

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Amazing Sleep Discovery

Funny story: Amazing Sleep Discovery

Dr Dawn Break, the famous sleep disorder therapist, has announced an incredible discovery that will revolutionise the scientific approach to sleep disorders. 'The main discovery' she told our Scientific correspondent Joe Wink 'is in how to get peo...

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Russia’s Maria Zakharova and the UK’s Boris Johnson meet for kick-box wrestling match at the Hague

Funny story: Russia’s Maria Zakharova and the UK’s Boris Johnson meet for kick-box wrestling match at the Hague

Press Secretary of the Russian Foreign Ministry Maria Zakharova has had her challenge to UK’s Foreign Secretary Boris Johnson accepted. Mr. Johnson and Ms. Zakharova went at it just last evening inside an ICC auditorium, standing room only. In...

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Breaking news…

Republicans Respond To Trump's Madness....

Today Congressional Republicans responded to all of Donald Trump's outrageous behavior and lies .....................................................................................................not.
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