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Funny story: Jess Philips urges Labour members not to vote for her

Jess Philips urges Labour members not to vote for her

British Labour Party leadership contender Jess Phillips has begged members of the party not to vote for her to become the next leader. The outspoken Birmingham lass said “My campaign is truly dreadful, I have shit for brains and I don’t know what I’m...

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Funny story: Poll guru Sir John Curtice makes astounding predictions about next week in Westminster – Jeremy Corbyn will leave his wallet at home and Boris Johnson’s new puppy will shit on the kitchen floor

Poll guru Sir John Curtice makes astounding predictions about next week in Westminster – Jeremy Corbyn will leave his wallet at home and Boris Johnson’s new puppy will shit on the kitchen floor

Polling expert Sir John Curtice, writing in Mystic Meg’s column in The Sun newspaper today, has warned that next Thursday, lame-duck Labour leader Jeremy Corbyn, will leave his wallet at home in a rush to get to work. The damning foretelling is bound...

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Funny story: Conservatives should vote on Friday due to voting card mix-up

Conservatives should vote on Friday due to voting card mix-up

A nationwide change to polling cards means that the election will now be spread over two days. Boris Johnson has insisted that his face be printed next to the Conservative party's candidate on every polling card printed. As a result, there has been a...

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Funny story: Johnson's U-Turn U-Turn

Johnson's U-Turn U-Turn

Looking like the ghost of a hunchbacked chef that haunts a ruined French patisserie, Prime Minister Boris Johnson performed a radical U-turn on his previous radical U-turn by revoking his earlier U-turn of doing everything everyone wants all at the s...

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Funny story: UKIP Manifesto

UKIP Manifesto

Voters up and down the country were caught by surprise, after UKIP launched their political manifesto to six people at a local dogging site in Chelmsford. Current UKIP leader, Pat Mountain, was pleased with the reaction to the manifesto, as no one th...

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Funny story: Britain faces a Christmas election

Britain faces a Christmas election

Normally it is an occasion associated with excessive consumerism, fat-bellied bearded men giving gifts, and a drunken day off work. But this year, the election will fall at Christmastime, meaning that it will be even more garish and vomit-inducing th...

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Funny story: Encylopedia of Pretexts for Politics and Business due out by Christmas on Amazon dot com

Encylopedia of Pretexts for Politics and Business due out by Christmas on Amazon dot com

This newly-established encyclopedia already shows massive pre-sales, with release date December 24. It bears an array of acknowledgements on its title page: “Fascism is the cockroach of contemporary politics—even a nuclear war will not kill it!...

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Funny story: The Rhyme Minister under attack again

The Rhyme Minister under attack again

UK Rhyme Minister Boris Johnson has been criticised by the House of Cowmen for his arrogance, attitude, and for wearing bling in the Houses of Pearlmen. When accused of undermining his position, and making the Pearlmen look like fools, the Rhyme M...

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Funny story: Government reveals advice on Brexit

Government reveals advice on Brexit

The UK government has released recommendations on how British people and businesses can cope in the event of a no-deal Brexit. The documents, which were created at a cost of tens of millions of pounds, will be advertised on TV and social media. You c...

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Funny story: Bozo Johnson Concedes in Tory Leadership Race Citing "Back Problem"

Bozo Johnson Concedes in Tory Leadership Race Citing "Back Problem"

The favourite to become Prime Minister, Boris Johnson, has removed himself from the Conservative party leadership contest after coming under mounting pressure following Sir Kim Darroch's resignation as British ambassador to Washington. Critics of Mr...

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Funny story: Trump Makes Surprise Job Offer to UK Ambassador

Trump Makes Surprise Job Offer to UK Ambassador

The revelation from Sir Kim Darroch, the UK's ambassador in Washington, who described so-called President Donald Trump's administration as "inept" in leaked emails, has led to a surprise job offer from the reality TV star turned politico, who normall...

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Funny story: Boris The Dodger

Boris The Dodger

Conservative leadership candidate, Boris Johnson, candidly dodged questions about his leadership bid at a press conference about his leadership bid, leaving onlookers agape. Assembled journalists, political aides and random hangers-on were left my...

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Funny story: Sajid Javid’s “rightly behind bars” inspires new sentencing for Assange at 400 years

Sajid Javid’s “rightly behind bars” inspires new sentencing for Assange at 400 years

British Home Secretary Sajid Javid’s remark that Julian Assange is “rightly behind bars” has led to further developments on "how long?" Mr. Javid signed a US extradition request, followed by disclosure that Mr. Assange faces 17 charges and 175 yea...

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Funny story: Empty chair favourite to be new PM

Empty chair favourite to be new PM

In a televised debate between contenders to become the new Tory leader (and therefore temporarily Prime Minister), the surprise winner was an empty chair. The chair agreed to take part as a last minute replacement for pie-munching posh scarecrow B...

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Funny story: Renault Remoaner - Our Motoring Correspondent's Review

Renault Remoaner - Our Motoring Correspondent's Review

Inital Impressions Good to drive, and seems fairly reliable. First impressions are good but quickly fade due to overbearing cruise control that steps in when you least need it. Controls are simple, as everything is remote-controlled from a shady o...

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Funny story: Who will be new Tory leader?

Who will be new Tory leader?

It is the world's premier backstabbing medieval fantasy show, full of intrigue and evil characters. But who will become the new Tory leader? We look at the leading contenders. Ebeneezer Moneybags (6-1 favourite) MP for Mint and Wallet, he owns a...

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Funny story: Outrage as Farage's EU Election Results Party is Called Off by Police in Milkshake Riot Fears

Outrage as Farage's EU Election Results Party is Called Off by Police in Milkshake Riot Fears

Boston is a small port in Lincolnshire, on the east coast of England. The Borough of Boston has a population of approximately 70,000 people and prides itself on being the most pro-Brexit constituency in the United Kingdom with 75.6% (22,974 votes) of...

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