Mitt Romney Says Trump Will Be 2024 GOP Nominee
Former Governor of Massachusetts and US Senator from Utah, Mitt Romney, predicted that Donald Trump would be the 2024 GOP nominee for the United States president. However, Donald Tump’s former attorney, Michael Cohen, predicted that Trump would be in…
Read full storyLion-tamers to strike again
Just when Britain thought it had gotten over the effects of the last lion-tamers strike, another one is "lion"-ed up for the 13th of March. The Union of Lion Tamers is staging a walkout for higher pay and improved working conditions. "We're not ju…
Read full storyPeculiar sound over Washington DC extending with experts still baffled
A sound in the small hours of the night many people are now discussing seems to be extending rather than reducing. Reported first as located directly over the White House, it has spread throughout the country and into Alaska. Analysts working o…
Read full storyTiger Woods Seriously Hurt In Masturbation Accident
The world of professional golf was on tenterhooks tonight, after the former world number one player, Tiger Woods, was reported to have been admitted to hospital in a critical condition after being seriously injured whilst 'spanking his monkey'. Wo…
Read full storyEU cheese suppliers boycott Nr 10!
(NOT EDITED) As a result of a certain referendum, which has caused economic chaos in the UK, EU cheese producers have decided to 'twist the knife into the wound' even further by boycotting Nr 10 Downing Street. Very cheesy PM, Boris Johnson, a hug…
Read full storyMajor League Baseball Bans Sunflower Seeds In The Dugouts and On The Playing Fields
NEW YORK CITY - (Sports Satire) – After years and years of many players asking that Major League Baseball stop the archaic practice of allowing players, coaches, umpires, and bat boys to partake in sunflower seed spitting, things will be changing.
Read full storyTexas Finally Thaws Out!
(NOT EDITED) SAN ANTONIO – (Satire News) – Now that all of the damn, effen snow has melted, and is now in the Gulf of Mexico, things in the Lone Star state are slowing getting back too normal. The Vox Populi News Agency is reporting that the milli…
Read full storyEx-President Donald J. Trump is Pissed Off At Ted “Count Dracula” Cruz For Giving Republicans a Bad Name
PALM BEACH, Florida – In a perfect example of the pot calling the kettle black, reports coming out of the Plywood State say that the man who turned out to be a one-term president, is furious at Senator Ted “I’m So Cold” Cruz. DJT told his BFF, Sea…
Read full storyDonald Trump To Persevere With Insults
Ousted president, Donald Trump, was down in Miami to call on several old girlfriends and business associates, when journalists stopped him to ask him what he thought about Ted Cruz going to Cancun during the weather crisis. Trump simply smiled, an…
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