
Trump And Boris In Huge Transatlantic Cat Fight
Trump’s fighting with everyone. This time, Trump picked a fight with Boris Johnson, and hung up on him. Like, slam, bang, no thank you, man! At first, Boris thought it was a bad connection. “Hello, hello? Donny? Donny, are you there?” First t...
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Man still laughing at joke in Miranda
Shoe-throwing ladies man, Brian Asshat, a 64-year-old citizen from Chutney on the Fritz has revealed that a joke he once watched on BBC laughter fest Miranda still makes him laugh. 'It was just so funny,' said Brian. 'There she was, laughing at th...
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Man spending second hour stroking his beard
Hipster, Martin Jarvis, a 24-year-old experimental entrepreneur from Mithering on the Trent, has recently entered his second hour of stroking his beard. After growing his facial hair for a few months, he is rightfully proud of the brown mass of ha...
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Let's look at Wile E. Coyote's Art again
BBC's Arts Critic-in-Chief, Melvyn Bragg, has decided that it is about time that the art career of Wile E. Coyote was looked at again. The hirsute Mr Bragg said, 'For years, we looked at Wile E. Coyote's life as a series of failures. All of those...
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Rejected Valentine's card grumbling in the recycling.....
Popular Chutney on the Fritz schoolgirl, Sarah Fitzmaurice, 14, received a surprising eight Valentine cards, seven of which have been thrown out. Sarah told us: 'I only kept the one from Thomas Johnson, as he is lush. The one from Snotty Bob, flat...
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Six-Year-Old Reflects on His Time Inside
Thanks to weeks of unremitting thunderstorms, six-year-old Nashville resident, Chucky Dillon, was sentenced to consecutive time inside, without even time off for good behavior. "You really start missing the sunshine," said Chucky. "I would have gi...
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Donald Trump - The Little Peter Tweeter (5 Tweets)
TWEET #1 – For the 13th time, I do not know this Rudy Giulani fella nor have I ever met the butt ugly looking loser. TWEET #2 – Let’s all remember that the attorney general is first of all, President Trump’s personal attorney. And secondly if the...
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Trump and Putin Secretly Agree To Allow Trump To Build A 101-Story Trump Tower In Moscow
MOSCOW – One of Moscow’s leading daily newspapers, The Moscow Red Press, has just announced that a 101-story Trump Tower will be built right across from the Kremlin. The Red Press learned of the deal from one of Russia’s top ballerinas, Sofilana N...
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Meghan Markle To Launch Her Own Line of String Bikini Panties
HOLLYWOOD – The former Duchess of Sussex has decided to launch her own panties line, and she is calling it The Princess Meghan String Bikini Panties Collection. Her husband Prince Harry encouraged her by telling her that she has the sexiest panti...
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Liverpool: Jürgen Klopp Says "It's Too Early To Think About Titles"
Liverpool may be 25 points ahead of their closest rivals in the race to win their first top-tier title in 30 years, but their manager, Jürgen Klopp, is taking nothing for granted, and says it is far too early to be thinking of such things. Liverpo...
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