Trump’s fighting with everyone. This time, Trump picked a fight with Boris Johnson, and hung up on him. Like, slam, bang, no thank you, man!
At first, Boris thought it was a bad connection. “Hello, hello? Donny? Donny, are you there?”
First things first, Boris, the guy’s never been all there. Catch the drift? And second: What is this Donny business?
“I dare say, the chap’s hung on me! Me, the Prime Minister of Great Britain, and all the ships at sea! It is an outrage.”
Commiserate with Hillary. And his first and second wife, and James Comey, General Kelly, Andrew McCabe, General Mattis, the Mayor of San Juan, Puerto Rico, Stormy Daniels, John Bolton, Nancy Pelosi, Robert de Niro, Jeff Bezos, Meryl Streep, General McMasters, Obama to name a few. The list could stretch across the Atlantic to England’s Lands End, making a bridge.
But getting back to the Boris and Donald catfight, it seems Donald doesn’t want Boris to hire Huawei, a Chinese high-tech giant, to build Britain’s 5G information network. Donald doesn’t trust Huawei.
Shouldn’t it be the other way around?
It doesn’t matter. Boris does trust Huawei, and it’s Boris’s purse. So, slam, bang, no thank you, man! Miffed, Boris canceled his planned trip to the US. So there!
Learning that there was a dispute in existence between her Prime Minister and Trump, the Queen got on the blower, and the red telephone on the Prime Minister’s desk rang. The Prime Minister stood, lifted the receiver, then bowed.
“What the Sam hell is going on? That lunatic has fighter jets and bombs, as well as MBS and Putin’s poison tip umbrellas. Apologize at once.”
“No can do, your majesty. Trump hung up on me.”
“Hung up on Great Britain? Carry on, then.”
The Prime Minister, however, will attend the G7 meeting at Camp David. Warning: The Prime Minister’s cabin will be absent of bathroom facilities, and the outhouse pointed towards the Mexican border. Bed bugs, a certainty. Mice? Bet on it. Mattresses? None. Food? Leftovers. Mosquitoes? To be Imported by the truckload.
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