British Council chiefs use credit cards for lavish lifestyles of five-star hotels, Michelin-starred restaurants and retreats at exclusive golf resorts and spas
Money strapped Britain: In the austerity streets of Britain where the local libraries are closing down, cuts of 20% to the Police planned, reductions in hospital care, so much so that a recent Government report has slammed the care of the elderly in...
Read full storyA True Diary of Woe - Part Twenty-two
A diary of one man's utter failure, depression, frustration, cock-ups, and poverty, starting in August 1947 For three years, I actually took a proper holiday away, fishing with three mates from the Robin Hood Angling Club - Bill Bates, and Jock Kirkpatrick, and Mad Ken. Here's how they went: Chapter 37 - The Angling Holidays - Number 2@3 - Bungay, Suffolk En route to the Inn where we w...
Read full storyGov. Rick Perry Calls Michelle Bachmann A "Racc**n" On Sunday New's Show
BILLINGSGATE JOURNAL: Today, on one of the most watched Sunday political new's shows, Texas Governor Rick Perry, when asked if he had any comment regarding Michelle Bachmann's description of him being a "redneck Republican," he replied: "Despite...
Read full story100 US soldiers track notorious Uganda guerilla Joseph 'Putin Bitch' Kony
Kampala - NATO always had suspected, of course, that Joseph Kony, leader of Uganda's mass-murdering Lord's Resistance Army guerillas, was the inspiration behind the naming of Vladimir Putin's female black Labrador Retriever Koni. The mutt was wide...
Read full storyCelebrity Cannon Proves A Success
The new giant Celeb Super Cannon, which blasts annoying celebrities into space, has been hailed a big hit after successfully ridding the world of the UK's current Big Brother contestants. The group of 15 men and women join dozens of other reality sho...
Read full story"Occupy London" fails
A protest group calling themselves "Occupy London" failed dramatically to live up to their name yesterday when they only managed to occupy a small area near the financial district. Even that barely lasted a few hours until the police moved them on.
Read full storyTime's Up for Leaning Big Ben
Experts investigating London's leaning 'Big Ben' clock tower have now identified the cause. They say it is because of the vibrations going through the tower's structure every time the Great Bell, 'Big Ben', is chimed. The leaning problem with Big...
Read full storyMick Jagger Leaves List of Don'ts for McCartney at His Carribean Villa
Island Somewhere - Mick Jagger offered the use of his private Caribbean island Villa to Paul McCartney and new bride Nancy Shevell. He apparently left notes all over the house of what could and couldn't be done in the Villa, along with detailed "How...
Read full storyHeads no tails
After a spate of incidents involving football players long hair and ponytails the F.A. is thinking of bringing in a new rule to ban long hair and ponytails altogether! "Football players these days are worth millions of pounds and need to be prote...
Read full story'Yanks fell for Iran angle hook, line and sinker, heheh' Philip tells astonished guests
Windsor - "Damned well nearly pulled it orf," a sozzled Prince Philip confided to Castle guests last night amid growing suspicions of a botched Saudi 'inside job' to top the ambassador to the United States. "Blaming dodgy Iranians for the Mexican...
Read full storyYemen takes the lead in dealing with Occupy Wall Street protesters: shoot them dead
SANAA, Yemen--President Saleh, who's been dealing with Occupy Wall Street protesters since before they were called that, decided two days ago to have his troops open fire on protesters in hopes of putting an end to the silliness. Calling for the p...
Read full storyTop Publisher Sues The Dorking Review
Lawyers for top London publishing house, Stodgy and Wristflick have announced that they will be taking civil action against the team that put together this years surprise best seller The Dorking Review A spokesman for S&W's lawyers said today...
Read full storyRon Paul Ready to Endorse Ron Paul
TEXAS - Republican presidential candidate Ron Paul has just picked up more steam in his pursuit for the presidency of the United States of America once again. Formerly employed physician, author, and congressman Ron Paul has decided to endorse Ron Pa...
Read full storyMitt Romney Returns Favor and Endorses Governor Chris Christie's Favorite Snack
TRENTON, N.J. - When New Jersey Governor Chris Christie was asked if there was any quid pro quo being played under the table with Republican presidential candidate Mitt Romney, he vehemently denied all such allegations. In fact, the Governor of N...
Read full storySarah Palin Jealous Occupy Wall Street is More powerful than Tea Party
NEW YORK CITY - Occupy Wall Street continues to shake financial centers all around the world as average Joe's and superior celebrities sit on their lawn chairs and wait for America's next move. What makes this revolutionary more powerful than the...
Read full storyCellphone Kidnapper Still Loose on Foot
PHILADELPHIA - Police are looking for a man whose been running the streets snatching people's smartphones and stealing them while left unattended. Victims of the crime have pleaded for people to help catch the guy 'wearing a big jacket with the Germa...
Read full storyThe Real Reason Why New Jersey Governor Chris Christie Decided Not To Run In The GOP Presidential Race
HACKENSACK, New Jersey - The governor of The Garden State, AKA New Jersey, Chris Christie was in Hackensack as the honored guest at the dedication ceremonies for the newest Captain Cluckity Cluck Clucks Chicken Shack. Louisiana stand up comedian Z...
Read full storyObama Calls For No-Fly Zone Over U.S
Washington, DC U.S. President Obama has requested that NATO and the United Nations establish a no-fly zone over the United States to protect protesters from his fleet of drones that carry Hellfire missiles. "In light of my recent drunken assassi...
Read full storyGovernor Rick Perry Hits Back At Herman Cain And Puts The Pizza Dude In His Place
SAN ANTONIO - Texas Governor Rick Perry was in San Antonio as the guest of honor at an old-fashioned Texas-style barbecue that had been thrown in his honor by San Antonio natives George Strait and David Robinson at the former San Antonio Spurs palati...
Read full storyH.R. 2829 Politicians Advance Bill Targeting Taxpayer Funding for Government:
(Washington,DC) - A U.S. House committee Thursday approved a bill linking taxpayer contributions to the Treasury to significant financial, regulatory and other reforms, one day after presidential candidate Ron Paul said he would sign the measure if i...
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