Windsor - "Damned well nearly pulled it orf," a sozzled Prince Philip confided to Castle guests last night amid growing suspicions of a botched Saudi 'inside job' to top the ambassador to the United States.
"Blaming dodgy Iranians for the Mexican narco-terror hit man hiring was, of course, a master stroke," Philip added, "and Young Harry should be congratulated for coming up with the Mexican angle!"
Not everyone in The Firm is overjoyed about the failed plot, however, as the 'problem' of a spat between The Windsors and Saudi Arabia's envoy to Washington continues to niggle.
Last year the Foreign Orifice demanded that Camilla return millions of dollars-worth of priceless bling given to her by Saudi sources after suspicious pawn shop receipts triggered a money trail probe.
Then there's the weensy problem of smuggled firearms, allegedly discovered by FBI agents in the Cambridges' 'diplomatic luggage' during William and Kate's Hollywood cringefest appearance in July.
Secret tracking devices planted inside the hardware by LA Bureau sleuths may have led to the outing of last weekend's failed assassination plot, news of which has ratcheted up international tension with the Iranian hardline state.
Another Palace plot to hire 'Lord's Resistance Army' mercenaries in Uganda to oversee the current Somali pirate recruitment program is bearing some fruit, however.
This week President Obama announced he's sending in 100 US ground troops to Kampala to weed out the vile African guerillas, thought to be tormenting his 2012 re-election hopes with daft stories about his 'Kenyan' birth.
Sarah Palin is 69.