Rugby world cup final win invalid due to illegal Springboks player
The 2007 Rugby World cup has been thrown into turmoil after English Newspaper, the Sun broke the news that full back Percy Montgomery was not eligible to play for the South Africans and as such the World Cup final and possibly the entire tournament...
Read full storyGlobal Warming is caused by the planet Venus
The lunar calendar and more accurately the Mayan long calendar predicts 2012 to be the date when the gravity of the planet Venus negatively affects the Moon's lunar trajectory and causes disruptions in the weather patterns on the planet Earth.
Read full storyCruise & Travolta Lobby For Scientology Reading Rooms
Hollywood, California. Inspired to action by national events rippling through the Constitutional Advocate pool of advocates demanding separation of Church and State and their opposition advocating, well, the opposite, specifically all faith chapels in national and international air terminals, celebrity actor Tom Cruise and fading celebrity actor John Travolta have joined forces in...
Read full storyParis Does Africa
Socialite Paris Hilton arrived at the Hôtel des Milles Collines late Tuesday night after an 18 hour flight from JFK to Kigali's International Airport.
Read full storyJustice League: An Open Letter To The Hollywood Suits
Hollywood is ablaze with rumours and innuendo in relation to the big comic movie of 2009, possibly the biggest comic book movie, like, ever. Yes, I am talking about The Justice League movie.
Read full storyCanterbury Research Uncovers New Form of Internet Related Disease
Cyberworld - Depressed, desperate, frustrated, angry and sad. Is this you? Then perhaps you have fallen into the murky mists of Seed's 'Blank Screen Law'.
Read full storyRumsfeld/Wolfowitz to Hand Out Candy Corns of Appreciation this Hallowe'en
District of Columbia (Scars and Tripes) - It began quietly enough last week when the Dalai Lama was presented the prestigious Congressional Gold Medal for his many years of selfless work with Tibetan llamas.
Read full storyWater Board For Attorney General Mukasey
Washington Toast - Unable to answer whether water boarding is torture, the chairman of the Senate Judiciary committee invited the newly nominated Attorney General, Mr. Mukasey, to spend a few hours on a water board to help pluck a simple "yes&qu...
Read full storyScorpio, the sign of the sting
Buckingham Palace - (Ominous Mess): Panic has erupted in the ermine-lined corridors of power at Buck House as The Puppet Monarch's confident prediction of an England Rugby World Cup triumph bit the dust late last night.
Read full storySatirist Sews Mouth, Dons Mask in Protest Against Stuff
Bogota, Colombia - (Associated Mess): An unemployed Colombian satirist has been reported as having sewn shut his mouth and locked himself behind a grotesque mask to demand the return of comedy to his beleaguered life.
Read full storyRudy Giuliani declares war on all alien life forms; vows to rebuild SETI and NASA space programs with offensive capabilities
Washington, DC - During a Giuliani campaign rally, an 8-year-old-boy asked him what he would do as President of the United States if it were discovered that alien life existed on another planet and it was hostile toward us. Without hesitation Giulian...
Read full storyHillary Clinton sells sexy used lingerie on eBay
After top MILF, Hillary Clinton, posed naked for an adult magazine and allegedly
Read full storyI got screwed sobs Tony
London - (Tossers Anonymous Mess): Former UK Prime Monster Tony Blair has sobbed his heart out and told reporters that his days in Number 10 were like being in an abusive, bullying relationship.
Read full storyJ.K. Rowling Outs a Harry Potter character to a crowd of her adoring pre-adolescent fans; draws collective gasp then...
New York, New York - Concluding her U.S. promotional book tour of the Deathly Hallows in New York City this week, J.K. Rowling dropped the bomb on the pre-adolescent audience gathered at Carnegie Hall to meet their number one fantasy writer by announ...
Read full storyMortgage Borrowers on Strike
Wall Street, New York (IP) - Our financial investigative reporter has discovered that mortgage borrowers have grown tired of being robbed blind by banks and other lenders and have gone on strike. This activity has caused a financial crisis of global...
Read full storyMail Order Bride lost in Post
There were embarrassed faces amongst postal workers in Delaware this week when it emerged that they had "misplaced" a mail order bride ordered by local businessman Jerry Crotch.
Read full story"Don't ask, Don't tell" says FIFA
Bruxelles, Belgium. In the aftermath of such a manly Rugby World Cup, FIFA has been forced to defend the few heterosexuals still playing "Association Football."...
Read full storyDNA - 1 UK - 0
London, Eng-er-land. - Scientists at the Institute of Physical Jerks in Norway believe they have isolated the rogue genetic sequence that causes British athletes to consistently blunder at important sports events.
Read full storySweeney Found In Cupboard With Fambly
The comet-haired physics teacher, Stanlonso Del Van Der Graaf Barber Shop Quintet Nucyulus-Sharpe, also known as Sweeney, WAS in the cupboard with Fambly, it was claimed a hundred years ago. And last night.
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