Doctors Claim Men Don't Empty Bladders Enough
In a stunning rebuke to conventional penis thinking, The American House Of Medicine has issued a report on men's urinating.
Read full storyExclusive interview with Senator Hillary Clinton
Websmuggler.com has snagged the first interview with Senatorette Clinton since she announced her candidacy for President.
Read full storyBranson "Helping Police" in Missing Data Fiasco
In a startling new development in Alistair and Margaret Darling's "Find the Data Discs" campaign, entrepreneur Sir Richard Branson has lent his help by donating £1 million pounds to help find the abductors.
Read full storyJose Morinho 'Baghs' Iraq Manager Job
Leather faced grumblestiltskin Jose Mourinho denies rumours he may take over the sacrificial lamb/temping post of England manager but has thrown his name into the bullet riddled hat to be the next president and manager of struggling third world divis...
Read full storyDeathrow for Heathrow
The M25 of the aviation world, Heathrow, has half baked five radical new 'pilot' schemes to combat its growing over use.
Read full storyClintons Reveal Dirt on Obama
The lid came off a scandal that may rock the race for the Democratic nomination to its scabby knees. In a press conference called earlier today Senator Hillary Rodham Clinton decided to come clean about the so called "dirt" she has on Senat...
Read full storyGeorge Clooney takes a break from Darfur to reengage his old arch nemesis, the paparazzi; claims to have new evidence they were in the grassy knoll
Hollywood, California - Falling just short of comparing the paparazzi to the terrorizing Janjaweed that conduct ruthless murderous raids on refugee camps filled with women and children in Darfur, George Clooney once again reengaged his arch nemesis,...
Read full storyHundreds of Ron Paul Supporters Protest the Tasing of White Nationalist Sympathizer, Lew Rockwell
Washington, D.C. -- Hundreds marched on Washington in protest over the recent tasing of White Nationalist sympathizer, Lew Rockwell, today. Shouts of "White! Pow-er. White! Pow-er," and, "Ron Paul! Ron Paul!" were amongst the neo-Nazi's and K...
Read full storyGovernment decides to arm British troops in Iraq
The Government has finally decided to arm British soldiers in Iraq. The decision, announced by the Armed Forces Minister, has been welcomed by the armed forces, who, until now, had been issued with spud guns and
Read full storyJudge releases killer but sends jury who acquitted him to loony bin
A Judge at the Old Bailey told a killer that he was free to leave the court on the grounds of diminished responsibility, then promptly told the jury that had acquitted him that they were bein...
Read full storyBritney's Freemason Ties Exposed in Tell-All Book
Britney Spears' first husband, Jason Allen Alexander, has just published a stunning tell-all novel about the pop princess turned Poppin' Fresh Dough Girl that reveals a myriad of stunning secrets about the star, including her ties to the secr...
Read full storyDetroit: Best Retirement Destination in America
In spite of Detroit's recent honor of being declared the most dangerous city in America, new poll of Salt Lake City prostitutes lists Detroit as the premier destination for retired people. The good news was most welcome by Detroit Police Chief E...
Read full storyPakistani "leader" Musharaf bans TheSpoof.com
Unpopular b*stard, President Musharaf of Pakistan, has taken another drastic step in his clampdown on any form of criticism of his regime by shutting down all internet cafe's which provide TheSpoof.com.
Read full storyClinton campaign setback as Arkansas mayor resigns claiming satanic abduction
Centerton, Arkansas - (X-Files Mess): Hillary Clinton's 2008 White House campaign is in dissarray as a key former political ally of her husband Bill resigned today claiming he was abducted and brainwashed by Satanists during the 1970s when provid...
Read full storyCivil Servant who lost Child Benefit CD thought it was a frisbee
A Government inquiry has revealed that the civil servant who lost a CD containing sensitive data about child benefit claimants, had thought the CD was a frisbee and had been playing with it in his ba...
Read full storyGovernment to sell banking details of child support claimants to highest bidder to raise extra cash
The cash-strapped Labour Government has announced that it plans to sell financial information about child support claimants to the highest bidder to help plug a £2 billion deficit in the Treasury cof...
Read full storyHuckabee's Big Move: Vows to Change Name
New York,USA -- The tide continues to turn for Mike Huckabee who's numbers improve everyday. The most recent coverage of his ethnic Serbian heritage seems to have given the candidate a bigger bounce than he expected, causing
Read full storyMourinho names his price
FA HQ, London - ('Ere we go 'ere we go 'ere we go Mess): Last spotted in October at the head of a Northern Crock queue with a pair of enormous suitcases and several burly minders, former Chelsea coach Jose Mourinho is sitting pretty at hi...
Read full storyNew sighting of missing discs in Morocco as Darling declared arguido
Whitehall - (Ass Mess): Treasury mandarins are breathing a sigh of relief as the missing child benefits data discs were sighted in Morocco.
Read full storyPretender's son hexed the football
FA HQ, London - (Disaster Mess): The Football Association has blamed Prince William for hexing the England team in last night's farcical defeat by the Croatians.
Read full storyBush Solves Problem of Missing Discs
The President of the fabulously wealthy country of America offered to come the assistance of the troubled British Prime Minister today.
Read full storyPope to Sex up anti-Sex Campaign
Sex Sells! We see it every day on TV, Radio, toilets, under manhole covers its in- (or un-) escapable.
Read full storyThe "Art" of Writing
As if. Do you think I would submit a piece called the "art of writing" if I knew anything about how to write stuff. What do you take me for? I can barely hold a pencil straight long enough to write down the number of the local pity clinic where I go weekly to get shots of confidence for my lagging libido. And besides none of that has anything at all to do with whether or not I can write.
Read full storyAmerican Talent
Harold Babbit and his wife, Mamie, were both handsome and pretty. Harold always dressed like a Southern gentleman, wearing a string tie which displayed an Indian design of white, blue, red and black stones. Mamie, in her forties, was still displaying that quick fading adolescent charm and innocence.
Read full storySteve McClaren - The Post-sacking Interview
Sacked England manager Steve McClaren has given his first interview after losing his job after only fifteen months in charge of the national team. Spoof reporter Harry Enscombe, respectful of the ex-Hull player's state of mind so soon after finding himself in the dole queue, put the questions to McClaren earlier today:...
Read full storyFrench Computer Calculates George Bush Should Go To Jail For 2 Million Years
A computer that analyses and compares data to come up with logical and mathematical solutions, has determined that, based on recent custodial sentences handed down to terrorists responsible for terrorism on both side...
Read full storyGermans found to be Industrious
A new report commissioned by the EU commission on Stereotypes was published today. Along with the startling revelations on the Germans it was uncovered that most of the Dutch people surveyed where easy going, Italians where intolerant maniacs, Irish...
Read full storyJob Centre Chaos As Thousands Apply For England Manager's Job
Staff at Job Centres across the UK were under siege today as tens of thousands of jobseekers descended on their offices to apply for the England football manager's job.
Read full storyAndorra To Blame For England Exit, Says McClaren
England manager Steve McClaren this morning berated the efforts of Pyrenees part-timers Andorra after their unsuccessful attempt to beat Russia last night - Andorra lost 1-0, a result which saw England crash...
Read full storyMiddle School students get culture from University field trip; remain shocked at what college has to offer
Eighth graders at a Middle School were taken to a local University for a field trip over the weekend. The University, was chosen because of its student diversity, great academic reputation and intimate setting with fewer numbers of students than near...
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