In the biggest single DNA test in history which were taken across the country at T-Bagger rallies, results show that 100% of the attendees are cousins! A spokesman for the testing company stated...."We thought we knew the results before we began..
In a stunning announcement today, Michael Steele Chairman of The Republican Party pronounced Abraham LIncoln as purged from the Republican Party. Said Steele....."We now know, proof positive, that Abraham LIncoln was not born in thls country and...
Reports are coming in from across the country that school administrators from grade school to high school are complaining about the behavior of students at sponsored dances. Evidently, the dancing has become so provocative that teachers and administr...
A memo leaked from the Republican National Committee notes that the GOP is shrinking dramatically in size. "We are now more like the pup tent party...not the big tent party"....notes the memo. "We must seize on our strengths....our individualism, and...
In a revelation that surprised many in the Jewish community but few in Washington DC, Senator Joseph Lieberman confirmed today that he has joined Hamas. Evidentially, Lieberman and Khaled Meshaal, the head of Hamas reached their agreement at a priva...
In one of the most stunning announcements in recent media history it has been revealed that Rush Limbaugh is not Rush Limbaugh at all but is an ex stand up comic named Joel Epstein! "He's a skinny little Jewish guy" exclaimed the source for this arti...
In a stunning announcement today, a spokesman for The T-Bagger and Birther movements stated that they were leaving in mass to emigrate to the moon. "We have had enough" said the spokesman, "and we're not going to take it any longer. We are going...
Colonel Yokado Nakamura, formerly of The Japanese Air Force and an instructor for Kamikaze pilots in World War 2 has been hired by the NRC to consult on the 2010 and 2012 elections. Mr. Nakamura now lives in Santa Clara California and is a floral...
Congressman John Boehner of Ohio stated today on the House floor that there was no need to include sexual orientation in the Hate Crimes bill. "Our country has a long and proud history of hate crimes" Boehner said. Joined by other members of the lea...
In a slogan eerily similar to the statement of Marie Antoinette, wife of KIng Louis XV1 of France 1774-1791, when she said "Let them eat cake" the T-Baggers have announced a new campaign to target those that receive any form of government entitlement...
A source inside the Republican National Committee has confirmed that the RNC is planning to hold the 2012 convention in a telephone booth. With the steep decline in the number of Americans who now declare themselves Republicans, the RNC has been face...
In what seems like an unprecedented move the bank lobby is pressing both the House and the Senate to pass sweeping legislation to designate all citizens who are in default on their credit cards as indentured servants. The legislation will affect mil...
In a joint news conference today, Senator Mitch McConnell, Congressman John Boehner, and RNC Chairman Michael Steele announced that they were petitioning Congress to build a Wailing Wall on the DC Mall. "It is time for REAL Americans to have a plac...
The NRA announced today that it is beginning a national sales campaign across American to promote the sales of automatic weapons and hand guns. "Our goal is to sell a weapon of some sort to every man, woman, and child in America over the age of six"...
Republican leadership in the House and Senate announced today that they would start the proceedings to water board Senator Olympia Snowe of Maine to determine if she is a real Republican. This will be done in the Senate chambers. They will also int...
According to a major news source, Rush Limbaugh is getting ready to make another purchase of a major institution. Following the disclosure this week that he is bidding to buy The St. Louis Rams, he has once again shocked the news industry and the po...
For the second time in two weeks, a well known media personality has been exposed in a sex scandal that has rocked the media world and their most devoted viewers. Still reeling from the expose of David Letterman and various staffers, the conservativ...
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