Banks Lobby Congress For Law Making Credit Card Defaulters indentured Servants

Funny story written by b kenneth mcgee

Wednesday, 21 October 2009

In what seems like an unprecedented move the bank lobby is pressing both the House and the Senate to pass sweeping legislation to designate all citizens who are in default on their credit cards as indentured servants. The legislation will affect millions of people and their families. What, at first, seemed like an incredulous suggestion, is now beginning to pick up momentum in both houses of Congress and the campaign contributions are flowing.

It appears that the entire Republican delegation in both houses is for the measure while Blue Dog Democrats and many others in the states on the southern border are considering the proposal.

Human rights groups were quick to reply and unanimous in their condemnation. "This is outrageous" stated the ACLU, "Absurd" sald the Southern Poverty Law Center, and the New York Times editorialized with a banner headline...." at last"

As the details emerged from the bill as presented, the banks would not hold the indentured servants in their own portfolio but would bundle them like derivatives and sell them in bundles. Under the provisions families could be seperated, husband from wife, children from parents, and the children would remain in the program until the parents debt was paid off....."Really not so much different than it is now" stated Republican Whip Eric Cantor.

Anti immigration proponents are solidly behind the issue. "Thls will solve a huge problem" said Senator Jim Demint of South Carolina. Our very own people will be taking these low paying jobs. Senator Jeff Sessions of Alabama added, "Finally....Engllsh Only in America...the spics will be going home"

The anti immigration caucus has added a provision to the bill to beef up border protection...."to keep the deadbeats from leaving" said Cantor. In this way, we won't have things like underground Railroads to contend with...people fleeing the country to escape their responsibilities. That's what we are all about..personal responsbility....and we are working with the Mexican government to keep Americans from leaving this great country while, at the same time, Mexicans in the tens of thousands will be going home to Mexico which is where they should be.....everybody wins"

While the well-to-do all over the country, in both the black and white communities were quietly celebrating the advent of cheap labor and cheap household help once again, influential members of the black community were speculating on the prospect of having their very own indentured servants. One well known media executive said on condition of annonymity...."I can just hear them at the fields...singing their music...and carrying on....they are such a carefree and happy people"

The Associated Press reports that the Reverend Jesse Jackson and the Reverend Al Sharpton have both suffered nervous breakdowns.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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