The government has announced plans to look at changing all UK placenames that have a 'foreign sound', to something a little bit more English. The move comes just two weeks after Brexit, and is intended to appease people who think 'foreigners' stil...
The England squad arrived in Pristina for their Euro 2020 fixture with Kosovo geared-up for a torrent of racist chanting and other unseemly behaviour, but were shocked even beyond their wildest dreams when the thousands of ruffians at the airport beg...
There was confidence aplenty running through the England squad this morning, as they woke up early to prepare for their 'academic' Euro 2020 qualifying game against Kosovo in Pristina on Sunday. The corresponding fixture at The Dell, recently, end...
The racism that England players so bravely put up with, turned the other cheek to, and ultimately vanquished, reared its ugly head once more yesterday, this time on home turf, as an exciting FA Cup fourth qualifying round game was ruined by hordes of...
BILLINGSGATE POST: According to Sky Sports, an international soccer match between England and Bulgaria’s national teams was interrupted twice Monday by semi-nude streakers wearing Saran Wrap Speedos and hoodies. The referee was forced to pause th...
There was another easy three points for the England football team in Sofia last night, as Gareth Southgate's boys absolutely annihilated Bulgaria by a trouncingly-reassuring 6-0 scoreline, settling fans' nerves after last week's poor show in the Czec...
It turned out not to be England's night last night, after they were beaten by a late, late goal to lose 2-1 to the Czech Republic in Prague. The Three Lions took the lead through a Harry Kane penalty after 5 minutes, but one can't help thinking it...
Harry Maguire, the Manchester United central defender, is to be given the captain's armband when England travel to Prague to play the Czech Republic in their European Championship Group A qualifying match tomorrow, Friday 11 October. For Maguire,...
Biarritz, France In an announcement that surprised no one, President Donald Trump wants to hold next year's conference at one of his clubs in Florida. "Everyone will be happy. We have waiters that don't bathe to wait on the French, we've got spott...
30-year-old Joe Taylor has reportedly opened a bar in the basement of his parents’ home in London. Joe’s most frequent customer is Mr. David Taylor, a lawyer at a prestigious law firm. He is reportedly depressed, and jumps at the chance of walkin...
Tottenham starlet and all round average midfielder, Harry Winks, has been detained under the mental health act after proclaiming that “trophies are just around the corner” for his Tottenham team. He followed this bizarre outburst with statements like...
England Women's football team coach, Phil Neville, was philosophical in defeat last night, as his charges went out of the World Cup in Paris with a 2-1 reverse at the hands of holders and favorites, the USA. Neville told reporters: "It's back to t...
England Netball team boss Phil Neville was adamant yesterday that nobody should question David Batty's recall to the England football squad for the friendly against the USA. "I'm adamant that nobody should question David Batty's recall to the Engl...
A man reading a report on the football match played last night between Croatia and England, had to confess that he had no idea who Jadon Sancho was, and had never heard of the bloke. "I'd never heard of the bloke," he confessed. Moys Kenwood, 5...
John Terry, the former Chelsea and England player, has announced his retirement from football, as nobody wants him anymore. Terry, 37, played more than 700 games for Chelsea, and won 78 England caps. He joined Aston Villa for the 2017/18 campaign,...
Harry Maguire, the Leicester City and England defender, has turned down the opportunity to join Manchester United, saying he fucking hates them. Maguire, 25, was born in Sheffield, and has always been a Sheffield United supporter. As such, there...
Let the celebrations begin! The England football team, so often derided in the past and labelled 'disappointing' at major tournaments, have at last 'completed the job', 'delivered the goods', and, in one last pathetic strain for a brilliant flower...
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