Ambitious Millennial opens bar in parents' basement

Written by KG Rose

Wednesday, 14 August 2019

image for Ambitious Millennial opens bar in parents' basement
Last orders, please, Dad

30-year-old Joe Taylor has reportedly opened a bar in the basement of his parents’ home in London.

Joe’s most frequent customer is Mr. David Taylor, a lawyer at a prestigious law firm. He is reportedly depressed, and jumps at the chance of walking downstairs and washing his sorrows away at a bar tended by his son, whom he fears is a chronic loser and never going anywhere in life.

Mr. Taylor said: “The drinks aren’t bad, and by drinks I mean drink, because God knows he knows how to make one. It’s his homemade special recipe—‘Millennial Malady.’’’

Joe said: “As soon as I get enough money from tips from my dad, I’m gonna get out and buy more booze, and open it to the public as a full service bar. The possibilities are endless.”

When asked how his mother was enjoying his entrepreneurial exploits, Joe continued: “You know, I’m seriously considering hiring my mum as a server.”

Mrs. Taylor chimed in: “It’s been twenty years since I’ve last waitressed, and it’d be nice to put away those adult colouring books for a while.”

Joe reportedly retorted: “My mum has anxiety. It’d do her good. She could have breaks in between shifts. She could drink, and I’d pay her in drinks, you know, on the house.”

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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